How does it feel
by Jaguarin
Summary: Caution: Slash fic HB. Helena discovers she loves Barbara but she is scared to talk about her feelings afraid to lose her friendship.
1. Chapter 1

**HOW DOES IT FEEL**

Title:HOW DOES IT FEEL

Pairing: H/B

Rating: NC17

Disclaimer: WB screwed the Birds of Prey show and we just remember it here. Shame I don't own it.

Content disclaimer: Adult language and sexual situations. F/F H/B

Fandom: Birds of Prey

Summary: Better no, read and discover it.

Comments: Constructive comments and suggestions welcome.

Others: First attempt to write an Salsh fic here, so please, no tomatoes, no eggs; but I accept complains and suggestions. Thanks soooo much to Mel. The help editing was wonderful. And thanks to Captain N. -I can't reveal her identity, but she does too a wonderful editing job!! Waves!

Helena jumped easily to the sidewalk. Putting her hands inside her pockets, she walked toward the Clock Tower. She was in a pretty good mood today. The last few months had been nice; things had returned to normal after Harley Quinn's assault on the Clock Tower. The months directly following that had been difficult for all of them. Barbara was smiling again.

She was off from work and just wanted an excellent night patrolling. She wanted action, adrenaline rushing through her veins. She pressed the security code at the elevator and stepped inside.

After a few seconds, the doors opened and she walked into the Clock Tower. "Hello, everybody!" The Delphi was vacant. Well, now that was weird. She looked around.

"Hellooooo?"

"Here, Helena." She heard Barbara's voice upstairs.

Knowing the redhead hated her to use her meta abilities inside the Clock Tower, she went to the stairs. "Why aren't you at the Delphi? No evil villains today?"

"No, it's not that, come here."

The brunette was up the stairs in a few seconds. She froze when she arrived in the living room. Dick Grayson was there; sitting on the couch next to Barbara, looking very comfortable, as if he lived there.

"Hey, Helena!" he greeted, standing up to meet her.

"Hi, Dick." She tried hide her discomfort; a fake smile plastered to her face.

He didn't seem to notice it and patted her back roughly as her hugged her. "You look great!"

"You too." The brunette looked at Barbara trying to figure out what he was doing there.

The redhead didn't notice her discomfort either; she was used to her bad moods; she put the cup of tea she had in her hand on the table. "He called me and I invited him to come."

"Great…" the young woman growled, "What are you doing here?"

"Well," Dick said, sitting close…very damn close….. to Barbara, who was also on the couch. "I came back to New Gotham and I thought it would be nice to see all my good friends again." He touched the redhead's hand.

Helena wanted to kick him. What was he doing? She fixed her eyes on their hands laced together. He was touching her very familiarly, and she… liked it?

"I think we can take the night off, Helena."

The words jerked the brunette out of her thoughts; she blinked. Did she hear that right? Barbara never cancelled sweeps. "What?"

"I invited her to dinner." He lifted Barbara's hand and kissed her knuckles. "We have a lot of things to talk about."

"Why don't you call Reese?" Barbara asked her, smiling. "We have been busy the last few weeks and you two haven't gone out in a long time for fun."

"Well…" Helena looked at her nails. "We broke up."

"Oh… I'm sorry to hear that."

"Not me." She shrugged her shoulders. "We are still friends, but our interests…" she raised her eyes and looked at her mentor, "…are different."

"Oh…"

"Shall we go?" Dick asked, rubbing his hands, "We can get drinks first."

"Good idea." Barbara began to transfer herself to the wheelchair.

Helena watched them both, incredulously. "But," she mumbled, "Are you serious? No sweeps tonight?"

"No, Helena," Barbara waved her hands "Go have fun. You deserve it. You never have time for yourself."

"It doesn't bother me…"

"Come on, Helena." Dick stood up following the redhead. "Enjoy life."

"Have a good night, Helena," Barbara said.

They passed next to her. The young woman was speechless; she hadn't expected that. When the elevator doors closed behind them, the brunette remained motionless, feeling a great anger inside her. Great, the wonderful night she had been expecting was ruined.

Dammit.

Annoyed, she let herself fall on to the couch, putting her feet on the table. Why was he back? What did he want now? Was he thinking about coming back into Barbara's life again? Did he think she was some kind of toy? He appeared and disappeared from her life as if she were nothing. It was unfair.

It wasn't fair. Barbara was enjoying life; she was smiling again after… Wade's death. It had taken long time for both of them to recover after Harley's invasion of the Clock Tower. What if he hurt her? She didn't need that.

"Hey, Helena! What are you doing? Barbara didn't tell you?" Dinah appeared suddenly.

"Tell me what?"

"We have a free night."

"Yes." The brunette took the remote control and turned on the TV.

"Are you going to stay here?" Dinah crossed her arms and looked at her.

"What's he doing here?" Helena ignored her question and began to surf channels.

"Well, as far as I know," the blonde moved the brunette's feet to the side and sat next to her. Helena returned up her feet to the table, "he has been calling her for the past two weeks."

The brunette turned to look at her in surprise. "What? She didn't tell me anything."

"I dunno why," she shrugged her shoulders and took the remote control from Helena's hand, "they've been talking every day. They went out for coffee last week."

"Coffee? When? Why didn't I know about it?"

"It was the day you had a double shift at the bar. Remember? Leonard punished you."

"Shit!" Helena growled, annoyed. "Why didn't Barbara tell me?"

"You know, she doesn't like to talk about her personal life. Remember the Bahamas trip with Wade? She didn't tell you about that either." Dinah started to change the channels on the TV.

"But she told you!"

"Maybe because I live here and I'm here all day; and you know, with Alfred around, it's impossible to keep a secret."

Helena stood up suddenly and walked toward the elevator.

"Where are you going?" Dinah asked.

"To get a drink. See you later."

The blonde shook her head and stopped her channel surfing on an old movie. "Hey, this one is good."

--------------------------------

The next day, the brunette pounded the punching bag. Imagining that it was stupid Dick Grayson was making the exercise routine easier. A violent kick made the chains tremble. Her entire body was drenched in sweat. She'd been working out for almost two hours and she still didn't feel tired. Thinking about Barbara dating him had kept her awake last night. The same questions twirled around her mind over and over: Why had he come back? Why didn't he just leave Barbara alone? He always appeared for a few days and then he'd leave. Barbara didn't need that crap now. She was only just recovering from her last loss.

Wade.

A loss for which she was responsible. Barbara had forgiven her, but she didn't know if she would ever forgive herself. Helena stopped, feeling a presence behind her. She turned. Barbara was there, watching her with those intense green eyes that seemed to penetrate her. The pale light of the sun that crossed through the round windows fell across her red hair, making it shine. It looked like an autumn afternoon. She was wearing her white workout outfit and those pants that hugged her legs like a second skin. Her abs were clearly visible on her exposed belly.

She swallowed.

"Hi," Barbara greeted. "Are you done?"

"Yeah…"

"Good." The redhead wheeled toward her exercise machine.

Helena followed her with her gaze and watched her get in position to hang upside down to do her sit ups. "So…," she tried to sound casual and picked up a big stick, "how was the date with Dick?"

"It was not a date… well… yes. But no."

"Very clear," the brunette mocked her and examined the stick.

Barbara shook her head while she secured the leather bands on her ankles. "I'm trying to say that we, well… we feel comfortable together, we have always felt comfortable together; and it's nice to be together again. He is fun, terribly fun. I don't notice the time when I'm with him."

"What does he want now?" Helena rotated the stick between her fingers.

"Sorry?"

"Well, he always appears after a few months and later disappears." The brunette walked toward her.

"We are not married." Barbara smiled.

"I don't understand, he seems very attentive to you, he spends a few nights here and then he leaves."

"Helena, this does not concern you."

"I don't like that he just uses you. How many weeks is he going to be here? He just wants to get you in bed and when he's finished, he leaves."

"Helena!" the redhead shouted in annoyance, feeling insulted.

"I hate that he uses you."

"My life is my life." She pointed at Helena with her finger. "Don't try to cross the line; if I want to take him or other man to my bed, it's my life! What makes you think that he is using me? Maybe I'm using him. Keep your nose in your business. Understand?"

The brunette nodded her head, she hadn't meant to offend her. "I'm sorry, I…"

"What you do or don't do with Reese is your problem. Fix your personal life first before trying to fix everyone else's." She hung upside down on the exercise machine. "It will take you years. Now, if you'll excuse me."

Helena knew she had screwed up again. Whatever she said now would be useless. She put the stick in its place and, putting the towel around her neck, she walked outside the training room.

Alfred was preparing lunch when she entered the kitchen.

"Hi, Alfred."

"Afternoon, Miss Helena."

She took a milk carton and sat at the dining room table with a leg over a chair. He noticed by her face that something was wrong. Years of working with the 'family' made him an expert at reading all of their gestures and expressions. He had learned to do it after realizing the women were not used to expressing their emotions, not talking about their feelings or fears. For him, now, it was easy to know when they were happy, sad or worried. Her expressions and movements were like an open book to him.

"Something happened?" He gave her a napkin.

Helena took a big swallow from the container, she licked her mouth and put the milk on the table. "No."

"Why is she angry with you now?" Alfred asked.

"How do you know she is angry with me?"

He smiled at her.

Helena knew she was cornered. She surrendered. "I opened my big mouth again."

"Is it about Master Dick?"

"I hate that he toys with her!"

He lifted his brow knowing he had hit the issue. "How do you know he is playing with her? They were a couple years ago."

"Alfred, please!" she said, exasperated. "When she was recovering, I never saw him here taking care of her. She was alone! She spent nights crying alone, she felt useless!"

"He was here sometimes, as I remember, but she didn't feel well. She was afraid of starting a relationship with someone."

"He gave up so easily. He should have kept trying! She needed to be pushed! And he just… just… just left her alone! It never bothered him if she was sick. It's unfair!" The brunette took another gulp of milk.

Alfred watched her curiously; he opened a cabinet and took out a box. "Unfair? May I ask you what is unfair?"

"I'm sure he is going to be with her for just a few days and then he'll leave, as always. That's unfair. Barbara doesn't deserve it."

"Have you considered that maybe she is happy with things this way?" The old butler opened the box of cookies and put some on a plate.

Helena looked at him incredulously. "She cried the last time he was here, before Wade, remember? She cried many nights after he was gone. She shouldn't have to cry again for him or for any one else. She deserves to be happy."

"And," he gave her the plate of cookies "according to you, who would be the perfect man for her?"

The brunette shrugged her shoulders, taking a cookie. "I don't know, anyone else."

"As I remember, you never liked Wade."

"He was dumb. Barbara was smarter than him."

"Oh, I see. So, Miss Barbara is angry with you because you told her this?"

"Yeah." Helena took another cookie.

"But in your 'own' words." Alfred emphasized 'own'.

The brunette sighed and took another sip of milk. "Yeah."

"I understand." He turned and started cutting an onion in slices. "You need to apologize."

"I tried, but she was very angry."

"She never is mad at you for too long, you know that."

"Whatever, I'm going to take a bath." She stood up.

"Pick up your clothes when you're finished. I'm a butler, not a nanny."

The answer was a soft grumble. He smiled.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day the brunette stretched after a long nap on the couch at the upper lever of Clock Tower. She stirred like a sleepy cat. Yawning, she sat and moved her head side to side until she heard her bones crack. That had been wonderful. She heard voices downstairs.

Barbara and… the stupid boy wonder again... She stood up and looked down. She couldn't hide her anger. Yes, they were talking at the Delphi. He sat on a desk next to the redhead, laughing. It would be great if the earth opened up and swallowed him suddenly, but unfortunately, she didn't have Dinah's mind powers.

Her eyes were fixed on all their movements. He was becoming very friendly with her. Not good. She didn't like seeing him there. Suddenly, he stood up. Instinctively, Helena took a step back, she didn't want them to notice she was there. Dick put his hands on the arms of Barbara's chair and leaned toward her. Helena felt her muscles tense.

"I'm really a great guy," he said playfully.

"I don't think so," she smirked.

"Girls say that I'm really a marvelous man."

The redhead raised her hand and touched his chin. "Can you prove it?"

He bent down and kissed her softly on her lips. Helena suppressed a growl and clenched her fist. Son of a bitch… How could he…? How could she…? Her knuckles turned white.

The tall man moved back enough to look into lovely green eyes. "You need more proof?" he asked breathlessly.

"I think so…" she whispered "You know, as a detective… I need to check all of the evidence."

"So… I'll need to stay." He kissed her nose softly. "I need time to show you all of it."

"Wonderful idea." Barbara wrapped her arms around his neck.

Blue eyes, watching from upstairs, tuned feral, as Helena felt anger burning inside.

Dick bent down and kissed her again. Barbara moved her arms around his neck and deepened the caress. She was lost in the wonderful feeling of feeling loved and… wanted.

The sound of the doors closing made Barbara break the kiss; she tilted her head up. Dick followed her gaze.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

"No… I thought…" She shook her head and smiled at him "Forget it. Where were we?"

Her eyes followed the movements of the cursor on the screen. She pressed a button. A map appeared. She pressed another button and a window opened on the screen next to her. She moved her wheelchair there and checked the files that appeared. After a few seconds, she chose one and a picture appeared, along with some information there.

"Okay, Huntress, the guy is very dangerous. An assassin. Be careful. He's an expert with knives."

::Good, I want action.::

"Be careful."

::I'm fine. I know what I'm doing.::

"Your coat is new."

Silence over the comm. The redhead smiled, knowing that had worked better than her suggestion of taking care of herself.

::You're right, I'll have careful.:: Helena said. ::I'm in…::

Sounds of a fight echoed. Grunts and blows. Furniture breaking. Something crashing.

That was a nice lamp, asshole…::

The sound of a fist against a face was unmistakable. Helena was being really rough.

"What lamp was that?" the redhead asked, scratching her chin.

::Century XV Chinese.::

"I see… how many guys there?"

::Two standing up again. Three down.::

"When you finish, go find Dinah, she is upstairs trying to find the books."

::Got it.::

"Dinah?..." Oracle turned to view her other screen "You in?"

::Yes. I'm in.:: the blonde answered.

"Have you found the account book? It would be helpful to support the evidence against the fraud."

::I'm checking some here at the desk… wait… I found it.::

"Good, take it and get out."

::Isn't this illegal?::

::You always ask that.:: Helena's voice was heard. ::For your information, it isn't possible to get a super-hero license yet. We don't have a union either; all the things we do are illegal, as are we; so just work and shut up.::

"Be nice, Huntress."

::I am. Let's go, little bird.::

::Are you going somewhere?:: a voice echoed in the place.

::Uh…oh...:: Dinah mumbled.

"What's going on?" Oracle raised her head.

::Bad guys, big guns...:: Helena mumbled.

"Dammit…" the red head growled.

::Hands up.::

::Stay back, kid.::

::No, Huntress!:: the blonde shouted.

Guns firing. Glass breaking. Yells.

"What's going on?" The redhead almost shouted. "Huntress!!"

The noise of guns firing was the answer.

::Huntress! Be careful! Behind you!:: Dinah's young voice called out.

Suddenly, an unexpected explosion and Dinah's cry made Oracle freeze in her chair. Something breaking was the last sound she heard before silence washed over the comms.

"Dinah?" Oracle looked at the two lights on the screen that signaled her protégées' location.

Silence.

"Dinah? Helena?" the redhead asked again, feeling her heat beating so fast that she thought it would break her chest. Why hadn't she installed cameras in the necklaces of her protégées? "Are you okay?... Answer me, dammit!"

::Cough, cough::

"Dinah? Are you okay?"

::Cough, I think so… cough::

"What happened? Where is Huntress?"

::I'm here… cough.:: the brunette answered.

Oracle felt a great relief and, resting her elbows on the desk, she let her head fall on her hands. "God… What happened?"

::Huntress is crazy!!:: Dinah shouted.

::I saved your ass, shut up.::

"Easy! What happened?"

::She threw me through the window! We were on the third floor!::

::Did you want to die?::

"Huntress!" Oracle shouted "Let Dinah explain."

Three guys appeared with guns, Dinah said, Huntress jumped at them. They fired.

::I knocked out two of them, but the third one had a bomb. Huntress' voice interrupted, He was going to blow us up. So I took Dinah's arm and jumped through the window.::

::We were on the third floor!:: the blonde growled.

::I was not going to let you fall! Please!::

Huntress loved adrenaline; she was crazy. The redhead rubbed her temples. "Why did you attack the men? They had weapons! I have told you a million times not to do that."

::We're safe, we have the book.::

"Come back now, got it?"

::Ok.::

She was angry, she always was in control of herself, but now she felt she had lost it. She typed at her keyboard; she pressed the search button and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose with her index finger. Huntress had never been cautious about fighting, she loved the adrenaline, the danger; but the problem wasn't that Huntress loved to live on the dark side, over the edge, the problem was that she was putting Dinah's life at risk, unnecessarily.

Leaning back, she hit her fist against the arm of her chair.

Damn girl.

"Barbara?"

"What?" she snapped out.

The blonde hesitated; her mentor was in a bad mood, nothing pleasant. She stepped back. "Uhm… sorry."

The redhead shook her head; she turned to see her, her clothed were covered in dust. "I'm sorry, are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm okay…" Dinah walked to the Delphi and gave her a big book. "Here is the account book.

"What happened?"

"You know how Huntress is," the blonde put her hands in her pockets, "she didn't like a gun pointing at her. She attacked them, but one of them had a bomb in his hands."

"I heard you screaming, I thought…" The redhead touched her arm and looked at her, worried.

"Sorry," the teen moved her hair nervously behind her ear. "Suddenly, she jumped over me and, the next second, I was falling out of the building."

The redhead shook her head in annoyance.

"Oracle… she protected me the whole time. She got the worst of the impact of the bomb and…"

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, she was coming behind me."

The elevator doors opened, Helena stepped out, cleaning the sleeves of her long coat with her hands. "Hi, superheroes."

Barbara glared at her, trying to remember the Zen thing to remain in control.

"Everything okay?" The brunette walked toward them.

"What the fuck do you think you were doing?" The Zen thing could wait. Barbara wanted to kick the young woman's ass.

"Huh…?" The reaction disconcerted the brunette. "…Kicking some bad guy's ass?"

"Don't try to be clever with me, not now. Are you crazy?"

"What? I was saving her!"

"Yes, but first you put both your lives at risk. You jumped on two men with guns!!" the redhead said, waving her hands, exasperated. "I have told you thousands of times…!"

"Nothing happened, Barbara." Helena tried to explain, "We're okay, we have the book."

"Thank God, you were lucky. I don't care if you want to kill yourself, but she is a kid!"

If those green eyes were knives, they would kill the brunette easily. Helena felt uncomfortable and avoided her look.

"Being a superhero is more than winning a good fight. It's avoiding them to protect innocents, and not putting people in danger unnecessarily; being a superhero means thinking of others first, and later of ourselves."

"Hi, everybody!" The elevators doors opened and an elegant Dick Grayson appeared with flowers in his hands.

Helena rolled her eyes, the last thing she needed: Dumb Grayson in her home.

The tall man looked at the girls. "Hey, what happened to you two? Were you cleaning the basement?"

"We were working on a mission," Dinah explained.

"Cleaning basements is a mission?" He leaned down and kissed Barbara on her lips.

Helena glared at him. What was he doing here?

"We had a situation…" Barbara cleared her throat, avoiding looking at the brunette, "But we already finished our conversation."

"Great," he gave her the flowers. "These are for you."

She couldn't avoid smiling. "They're wonderful, thanks…"

"Well, I'm going to bed," Dinah mumbled. "I have an exam tomorrow."

"Good night, Dinah," Barbara said.

"Good night." Dick kissed the girl's cheek.

Helena remained still, not knowing what to do. Dick rubbed his hands and looked at the redhead. "Well, I have a surprise for you."

"Yes?" Barbara asked.

"Yes, a wonderful dinner under the bright stars."

"Oh Dick, I'm sorry… I'm tired…"

"Oh, don't worry. I have it all ready… here." He pointed at the balcony.

"What?"

"A table, candles…"

She smiled, that sounded nice. "How?"

"Alfred helps a lot."

She took the back of his head with her fingers and pulled him toward her. He was so sweet, and a great kisser too. She lost herself in the moment, the sensations… until a soft cough broke the spell. She turned, Helena was still there.

"Yes, Helena?" she asked with a cold voice.

"Well… I'm," the brunette pointed toward the elevator nervously, "I'm... going home… uhm… do you need anyhing else?"

"No, thanks."

"I'll get the wine, it's in the fridge," Dick said, kissing Barbara quickly on her lips.

Helena watched him go.

"You and I still need to talk tomorrow," Barbara said.

Helena sighed and lowered her head.

"Good night." The redhead put her glasses on her desk.

"I'm sorry," the young woman mumbled, "I didn't want…"

"I said, we'll talk tomorrow," Barbara cut her off.

Helena nodded, knowing it was useless to try to talk with her now; Barbara was always a rational person, except when she was really angry.

And right now she was really angry.


	3. Chapter 3

After a pleasant dinner, with the dark night of New Gotham covering them, Dick and Barbara made another toast. She laughed.

"I love your eyes," Dick said, leaning over the table in the middle of the balcony, illuminated with a single candle.

"I love these wonderful moments. You are a great friend." She touched his chin.

"I don't want to be just your friend." He leaned over and kissed her.

The redhead sighed, feeling a bit uncomfortable, she'd felt watched all night. She looked around. It was absurd; they were on the balcony of the Tower.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

"No, thanks, it's been a lovely night." It was nice to feel that someone was attracted to her again. Dick was a handsome guy, they always had felt something for each other, but it always had been like a game. Helena's words during their discussion in the gym echoed in her ears.

"_I don't like that he just uses you. How many weeks is he going to be here? He just wants to get you in bed and when he's finished, he leaves."_

He felt her hesitate. "What's wrong, Barbara?"

She took the cup of wine in her hands. "Why do you come back, Dick?"

He put the cup of wine that he was holding on the table and took her hands. He touched her long, elegant fingers. "I always remember you."

"Me too… but... why are you here?"

He kissed her knuckles and took a deep breath, smelling her soft perfume. "Because I want to try… and I would like for you to try too."

"Try?"

"Try something serious between us, stop the games." The tall man stood up and kneeled next to her.

She felt his lips on hers. He was gentle and she opened to him. He tasted wonderful. She moved her hands to his arms, big, strong.

He moved back breathlessly, lost in the sea of those beautiful green eyes. "I want to be with you…"

She looked at him and smiled, he was worth the risk; she would try. After all, he'd known her since she was a teen and they had shared wonderful, dangerous, and sad moments, they know each other very well. Wade was gone and she needed to keep going; she needed to move on. "I want to be with you too…" She finally said, kissing him again.

The fine hearing of a dark figure hidden in the shadows had heard, very clearly, the whispered words. She couldn't believe it. He was going to hurt her again. Blue eyes blinked back unshed tears. The dark woman, who sat on top of the Clock turned. It was best to leave before someone noticed she was there.

Helena had been silent almost all through lunch. The brunette's face was glazed over as she lost herself in her thoughts. She poked her dessert with the fork. She hadn't touched it. The redhead narrowed her eyes. Helena not eating dessert; that was weird. She seemed to be elsewhere ever since she'd arrived at noon.

Barbara put a piece of cake in her mouth and cleaned her mouth with a napkin before asking: "Something wrong?"

Helena took her time before answering. "No."

"No."

"No."

"All day you've been… in another world?… Tell me what's bothering you?" the redhead requested. "You haven't touched your cake. You love chocolate cake. When something is bothering you, you usually don't eat and just play with it."

The brunette looked into Barbara's eyes, feeling exasperated, "Do you always have to analyze everything?"

"I'm not analyzing, I know you," Barbara took a sip of her coffee "you always act the same way under certain circumstances."

Helena, annoyed, lowered her gaze and, after stabbing a piece of cake with her fork, she put it in her mouth. If she was so smart, why couldn't she see…. ? Damn. Stupid Dick Grayson had stayed in her room all night.

Asshole.

Big asshole.

No, not a big asshole. A son of a bitch.

"Trouble at the bar?" the redhead prodded, trying to help.

"Hey!" Dinah walked inside the kitchen with a big smile on her face "Am I in time to start sweeps?"

"You're in time," Barbara answered.

Dinah kissed her cheek, "Where's Dick?"

"Out of the city. He had to go to Metropolis."

"He is a really nice guy-- funny and smart." The blonde sat next to her.

Helena rolled her eyes. Yeah, yeah, keep encouraging her.

"He is." Barbara smiled.

Dinah leaned a bit towards her mentor. "And he is good?"

Helena stood up abruptly. "It's late, time to work."

"Don't worry. We have time." The older woman said with the cup of coffee in her hands.

"I'm tired." The brunette took her coat. "I want finish early today. Come on, kid."

"Dick will be back tomorrow," Barbara said. "Are you going to have dinner with us?" She was still annoyed with Helena, her behavior the last few days had been annoying, but they couldn't fight like children all her life. She was just impulsive, angry, she was just… very Helena.

"Oh thanks," the brunette said, "but I can't… I'm going to see Reese."

"Excuse me?" the redhead asked in surprise.

Helena waved her hands, "He wants… to get back together… and… well, we are going to talk about it."

Barbara felt a bit disappointed, she had expected had a nice dinner with them and… maybe filing harshness.

"He told me he'd come to the Dark Hose after my shift."

"Oh…" the redhead put her cup of coffee on the table, "I'm glad for you."

Silence filled the room. Dinah felt a strange tension there that could be cut with a knife. "Well…" she clapped her hands, "Let's go to work."

"Yeah." Helena sighed and walked toward the elevator.

------------------------------------------------

Helena handed Reese a beer. He sat at a table next to the bar. He had been going to the Dark Horse everyday for the past week just to be near her. She had agreed to date him, but she wasn't yet convinced to be his girlfriend again. She was thinking about Barbara all the time; she couldn't avoid being worried about her relationship with Dick. She was afraid that he would hurt her again at any moment; and, this time, she would kill him for it.

Snapping his neck would be fast, but maybe not painful enough. Reese touched her hand, she smiled at him. They were trying to fix all their problems and he knew he needed to be very patient.

"You look wonderful tonight."

She winked at him. "You too."

"What time does your shift end?"

"Thirty minutes. Are you going to wait for me?"

"Sure."

"Hey, good evening…"

Both turned, surprised, Barbara and Dick were there. Helena smiled nervously.

"Hi."

"Hi," the detective smiled back.

Barbara looked at Reese's hand laced with Helena's. She cleared a knot in her throat. "I suggested to Dick that we come here. You've been so busy and we haven't seen you all week. You've just been working and on sweeps…."

"Oh, yeah…" the brunette said, "Reese, this is Dick, an old friend of Barbara. Dick, this is Reese."

"Detective Jesse Reese, it's a pleasure." He shook his hand.

"The pleasure is mine."

"Sit, please." Reese waved his hand, "I'm waiting for Helena to finish her shift."

"Want a drink?" Barbara asked Dick.

"Yeah, sure," the handsome man said.

"Okay, ask, I'm the Bartender here." Helena smiled at them. She observed him. Perhaps ripping his head off his shoulders seemed to be the best idea; but she needed to focus on the moment and be polite.

After two hours of nice chatting, Dick practically dragged the redhead to the dance floor. Helena sat next to Reese, watching them. They seemed to be having a lot of fun. She looked so happy, her eyes were only for him; her smile was perfect. Had she ever once smiled at Helena that way?

Her hair was beautiful, as was she. It fell gracefully over her shoulders. He leaned in and said something to in her ear that made her laugh. She moved her head back and Helena could see her perfect neck. She was beautiful. Her hands wrapped around Dick's neck. She had felt her close so many times before – her softness, the firmness of her muscles.

"Helena? Are you okay?" Reese asked. They were standing up at the table, listening to the music in the bar.

She swallowed all her tequila in one shot. "Yeah." She took a bit of lemon and sucked it. At that moment, she wanted to be a normal human being, able to get drunk with just a few shots of liquor.

"Something wrong with Barbara?" The tall detective slipped an arm around her back.

"No, why?"

"Because I'm talking to you and you are in another world. All night you've been looking at her. Your eyes are glued to her."

"Well, we had an argument last week. That's all, but everything is fine now."

"You sure?"

"Yes." She smiled at him. She turned to see the couple on the dance floor. The redhead kissed him. It felt like a punch in her gut and she took another tequila shot. When she raised her head, green eyes were looking at her. She felt her skin burning. Without thinking, she turned and, surprising Reese, she put her hand behind his neck and pulled him down.

She kissed him fiercely; it was long, wild, desperate. It was an impulse, a way to run away… but, run away from what? After long seconds, he moved back breathlessly.

"Wow… what was that?"

She looked at him, trying to not think.

"I hope that was a yes." Reese smiled at her, touching her cheek.

"Give me time…" she whispered, hiding her eyes behind her dark bangs.

"Time for what? I'm pretty sure that I love you, you don't?"

She hesitated a few seconds before answering. "I don't want to hurt you… It's not that… it's… it's what I am."

"What about what you are?" He was not going to let her run away. He took her hand in his.

"I'm confused…" She chewed at her bottom lip; she needed to think fast to escape the mess she had built "…about what I was, what I am, and what I want to be…"

"I love what you are." Reese took her chin between his hands and pressed his lips to hers.

"You are having a good time too, eh?" Dick interrupted them.

Reese smiled and wrapped an arm around Helena's waist. "Always."

Barbara finished her cup of wine without saying a word; she put it on the table and licked her lips.

"We can call this a night," Dick said, looking for his wallet.

"My treat." Reese stopped his movement. "Please."

"Are you two celebrating something?" Barbara raised her brow.

"Maybe we will give you a surprise soon." The tall detective grinned toward Helena.

"Oh… good." The redhead nodded.

"Well, thanks." Dick shook his hand, "We need to go, Barbara has to be to work early tomorrow. It was a pleasure to meet you, Reese."

"You too." He shook his hand.

"Bye, Helena."

"Bye, Dick, see you, Barbara."

"Have a good night, Helena… Reese." The older woman smiled at them.

They watched them go and then Reese turned to Helena. "Want something else to drink?"

The brunette hugged herself and smiled at him. "No, I'm a bit tired, I would like to go to sleep. Would you excuse me?"

"Sure, let me get the bill." He raised his hand to the waitress while Helena, with her eyes hidden behind her rebellious hair, watched the door close behind Barbara and Dick.


	4. Chapter 4

Barbara removed her glasses and put them on her night table with her book. She had been trying to concentrate on her book, but had been unsuccessful. She turned her torso and hit her pillow lightly, before lying down. Stretching her arm, she turned off the lamp and closed her eyes.

After a long two minutes, she opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. Her mind was wandering; Helena had been distant, speaking to her only when necessary or when discussing work topics, nothing else. After the dark months that had followed Quinn's assault, things had been flowing so wonderfully. Helena had been very attentive to her, nice, in a word: lovely.

Sometimes the brunette had surprised her and Dinah with something small or would just lie on the couchwatching TV and eating popcorn. Helena and her weird sense of humor made her laugh almost every day. She'd even been playful with Dinah. It made her feel so happy; her family was back.

But the last few weeks, Helena had turned distant, hostile, she had been… yes, she had been avoiding the ClockTower, since Dick had come back in her life. She was like a big jealous child, demanding attention all day. She needed to understand that she was trying to rebuild her life.

She knew Dick from years ago; he was an important part of her life. They had been friends from the beginning and, later, they had started a game of flirting that sometimes ended in furtive and unexpected lovemaking.

Later, things had changed, he had been trying to find himself without Batman, and she had been trying to find herself after the shooting and trying to help Helena survive her personal tragedy. In some way, saving Helena had saved her too. She had to give the girl long speeches about why they should keep going, keep living…

One night, she found the rebellious teenager standing on the edge of the balcony. Half of her feet were in the air and the other half on the slippery surface of the cold bricks. Seeing the thin brunette there, with her gaze lost on the lights of the city below her; ready to jump, had taken the air from her lungs.

She had called her name, softly, afraid that any sudden movement or loud noise would make her jump. Shyly, the dark head had turned to face her; blue eyes filed with tears; she could read in them that she was saying good bye.

She had been terrified. At that moment, she'd realized the girl was an important part of her life, a reason to wake up and to keep going, and she'd understood the meaning of all the speeches she'd given Helena.

"_Please, don't leave me alone. I… I can't do this without you…" She had caught her attention; sad blue eyes were glued to her. "Help me," Barbara said softly, "you give me strength, courage… You are my reason to keep going. Please…" She extended her hand to the girl._

_The brunette hesitated, her gaze lowered to the extended palm of her guardian._

"_I need you, Helena." She wheeled slowly toward her. "I need you so much."_

_The young girl remained still. Barbara knew she was on the edge. Sshe stopped and smiled at her. "Please, stay with me. I love you."_

_Helena jumped down and walked toward her silently. Suddenly, she collapsed and hugged her guardian desperately, sobbing. The older woman sighed with relief and hugged her back and cried; she had been seconds from losing her. The two shared the moment, needing each other._

Barbara closed her eyes, remembering that wonderful moment. It was so good to hug the girl, comfort her. Helena felt so vulnerable in her arms. She knew she loved her so much. She didn't need to be jealous; her place in her heart was unique, irreplaceable. They had shared so much pain, sadness, hope, triumph, failure. She was an important part of her life, of herself.

But Helena needed to understand that she needed Dick; that it was different. Love was a wonderful feeling and she was trying to find it again with him.

She sighed.

Sometimes she wondered if things would work really with him. He was nice, handsome; strong, but sweet; always doing the small things for her. A fantastic lover, but… she still felt something was missing. Dick was incredible; any woman would die for him. She didn't understand why, after all the attention and care he took with her, she still could feel…

Unsatisfied?

A hard word, but, yes, she was unsatisfied.

She was selfish, what else could she ask of him? He was giving her everything.

"Damn," the redhead mumbled, brushing her hair back and fixing her eyes on the ceiling. Had the years in that chair made her cold?

Frigid?

Another difficult word.

"Relax, Barbara," she said to herself. Maybe she was stressed, things with Dick had moved too fast, plus Helena's tantrum. She just needed time and things would flow again.

The brunette would understand, it seemed that she was back with Reese. Barbara didn't like that idea very much, he was not the person that she expected for her; he was a bit… chauvinistic? Macho? Well, any one of the words would fit him perfectly. He was a really handsome man, educated and nice. But, there was something in him that she didn't like.

And her sixth sense never failed.

Helene and Reese together; no, definitely not good. Helena was full of life, loved the rush of adrenaline, the action. Reese was rigid, always thinking about rules.

No, he was definitely not for her.

She closed her eyes and tried to sleep, the next day would be hard.

The old butler cleaned the silver, with his sleeves pulled up to his elbows in the dining room. It was Tuesday. Tuesdays were typically ideal days to clean it because there was not much work.

Dinah appeared, after a long day in school, with her big smile and sat next to him.

"Hi, Alfred."

"Good afternoon, Miss Dinah," Alfred said. "Did you have a good day?"

"Yes. School isn't so bad after all." She crossed her arms on the table, "Where's Barbara?"

"She called and she told me she needed to stop by the book store."

"She really enjoys looking for new titles, eh?"

"Yes, it's her favorite sport."

She took an apple off the fruit plate and bit it. "Alfred, do you know what's going on?"

"Excuse me?" he raised his brow.

"Helena and Barbara, they've been acting weird the last few days."

"Weird?"

"Oh, come on!" Dinah rolled her eyes. "You know, since a month ago, Helena doesn't come here often, and neither of them talk much. Barbara's been in a really bad mood. Those two have problems. Barbara always talks to you. What's going on?"

"You know, Miss Dinah, that Miss Barbara is very private and she never shares things about her personal life."

Dinah glared at him.

"Perhaps you should ask them."

"Barbara is in a pretty bad mood." The blonde said, "You know how Barbara is when she is in bad mood. And you know that no one can make Helena talk when she doesn't want to talk."

"Yes, I know." Alfred picked up a cup to clean it.

Dinah watched him and, after a few seconds of silence, she frowned. "And?"

"And?"

"Alfred, please!" she pleaded.

"Miss Dinah, a crime fighter's life is a mystery. You must know that. Mysteries are hard to solve. And Miss Barbara and Miss Helena, are a big mystery."

"Mystery? What's a mystery?" Helena appeared in the kitchen.

"Life is a mystery." Dinah rested her head on her hands.

"And?" the brunette asked.

"And?"

"Yes, and?"

"Forget it. I'll go change, we need to train." The blonde stood up giving Helena her apple and went to her room.

Helena watched her go and bit the apple. "What's going on?" she asked the old butler.

"Teenagers are a mystery," he responded, smiling to himself.

"Good fight Dinah." Helena smiled, patting the blonde's back in the training room. They were finishing a long, exhausting training session.

"This was great." The teen put a towel around her neck.

"Good movements," Alfred complimented, walking toward the furniture. He needed to clean it.

"Thanks," both girls responded.

"I'll go take a shower. I'm going with Gabby to the movies. Want to come with me?"

"Nah," Helena waved her hand toward the punching bag. "I want to practice a bit more."

The brunette arranged her gloves and walked to the punching bag. She began with fast punches and changes of movement. A few moments later, she was working on a combination of kicks and punches. The young woman rotated herself and sent a strong kick at the bag.

Dick walked down the corridor toward the kitchen and almost bumped into Dinah at the elevator.

"Oh, hi," she said, smiling.

"Hi, how are you?"

"Fine, I just finished my training with Helena."

"Oh."

"Sorry, I gotta go." She waved her hand and went toward her room.

"Bye." He watched her disappear behind her door and, an instant later, his gaze went to the elevator. Helena was downstairs. She had always been a temperamental girl and it pissed him off that she always seemed so arrogant. He hated that Barbara were always considerate with her, putting up with her bad moods and her rebelliousness. The brunette took advantage of her.

Helena thought she owned of the house, well, in some way she did; but Barbara was in charge. He was thinking seriously about starting a new life with Barbara, maybe it would be good to talk with the impetuous girl about that. He was not like Barbara and he was not going to tolerate her impulsiveness or her tantrums. He was going to be the man of the house and he wanted order.

Helena jumped and launched a double kick at the punching bag.

"Impressive," a man's voice appraised behind her.

Helena turned, Dick was standing in the door frame, wearing pants and a thin shirt, His feet were bare. And his hair wet.

Wet?

That was strange, had he taken a bath… in Barbara's shower? What the hell was he doing in her room?

"Hi… What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I was with Barbara… I took a shower and I left her sleeping. I came out to look for some coffee, but I heard you in here."

He had been with Barbara. In her room. The two of them. Alone. He had taken a bath and left her sleeping. Two plus two equals four. It didn't take a genius to figure out what they were doing. Blue eyes morphed as she turned and walked toward the weapons rack that Alfred was cleaning. She took two sticks and threw one to him.

"Wanna train with me?"

Alfred turned his head and looked at her.

"Sure," the tall man responded, moving the stick between his fingers.

They circled each other. Helena grinned at him.

"So… you had a good day?"

"Yes."

The brunette attacked, but Dick blocked by raising his stick.

"Barbara is a great woman," he commented.

"I know."

"She is sweet, kind, gentle… but… she has a lot of adrenaline inside."

Helena attacked with quick movements, making him step back.

"I want to talk with you."

"About?" She circled him.

"Barbara and I have been thinking about starting a life together."

It was like a punch on the girl's stomach. "She said that?"

He launched an offensive with his stick. Helena ducked and hit his knee.

"Good move…" He jumped back "Yes, we've been talking about that, and I would like to talk with you about how things are going to be."

"How things are going to be?" Now, that sounded really bad.

Alfred curiously turned his head to watch Dick.

"Well, I'll be around now and you better get used to it." He attacked her again. Helena avoided his blow and threw one of her own, but Dick was fast and stopped her. Their faces were inches apart.

"She wants you to come to live with her?" the brunette asked, incredulously.

"I'll ask her that… but I want you to know first. I know you don't like me very much."

"Clever." Helena pushed him back with her stick.

"I know you and Barbara are friends, but I'll be the man of the house, responsible for Barbara." He moved quickly and his stick flew toward her.

That 'man of the house' speech sounded like a load of shit. She barely stopped the blow and turned. "Responsible for Barbara?" She laughed. "What kind of crap is that? She can take her of herself, she doesn't need anyone, especially not you."

Alfred raised his brow. He didn't like this.


	5. Chapter 5

"Well," the tall man attacked her again with two fast movements, "you only worry about yourself, you are selfish. I've seen her dealing with you. Most of the time you give her headaches and trouble."

Furious, Helena answered his attack and hit him again. This time on his arm.

"Excellent…" he smirked. "As I was saying, Barbara has feelings."

"I know that," Helena growled. He was a fucking idiot.

"She needs someone who listens and…. she has needs. Needs that only a man can satisfy."

"What do you want?" the brunette glared at him and stepped back.

"I'm going to come live with her: I don't want trouble. I want you to respect this place as my home." 

"_Your_ home?" Yes, he was definitely crazy.

"Yes, this will be my home, and you need to respect our time and space."

Helena blinked. "What?"

"You are used to coming here any time you want, doing whatever you want. So… we need to…eh… establish a time?"

"Establish a time?" Had he lost his mind? He was going to tell _her_ when she was allowed to come to the Tower?

"Yes, we need privacy. I don't want to walk out my room at midnight and find you lurking in the corridors."

"This is our home and you are not going to change it," she growled. That was enough. She used all her strength and smashed her stick against his.

"Things change, Helena, always." Dick smiled sweetly and answered her attack.

Helena raised her arms and blocked him. Crouching down, she swept the stick below his feet.

"Wow, that was a good move." He jumped and raised his stick.

The next crash of sticks echoed loudly in the training room. Alfred stood and watched them. Both of them were becoming too aggressive. He needed to stop it.

"How long have you been living with Barbara? Eight years?" Dick asked, hitting his stick against Helena's.

"Five. The other three in my place," the brunette answered, stopping another blow.

"Sometimes I just don't understand how she took care of you. No offense."

"Why? I don't have three legs." She stepped back.

"But you were a perfect candidate for Juvenile Hall," Dick mocked, finally hitting her on her thigh.

The comment angered the young woman so that she didn't feel the blow. "And I thought you were a candidate for the Old folks home."

"Good move, but not better than mine." He hit her again successfully on her hand "I'm not so old. I have a lot of energy, ask Barbara."

Feeling her blood burning, the brunette attacked him. "Barbara deserves a good man."

With six fast movements, she cornered him. Rolling on his side, he hit her. She stopped his blow and, with the sticks between them, their faces were once again inches from each other.

"I'm a good man." He smiled.

"Yeah? Where were you those first few months when she was healing after the shooting?" she hissed.

"I kept an eye on her."

"Sure, by phone every month. Great."

His face hardened.

"Where were you on the nights that she cried alone in her room, feeling miserable and lost? Watching TV? You are a great friend.."

Dick clenched his teeth; she was going too far.

Knowing she had hit a sore spot, Helena grinned. "Wait, I almost forgot," she said. "You weren't here when she was sick either. I spent my nights taking care of her, giving her medicine, lowering her fever." She pushed him back. "Where were you? Where were you when she laughed again for first time in months?"

"What's your problem?" he asked annoyed. "Me? That she is happy with me?"

"Happy with you for how long? You always leave without stopping to think if you hurt her or not."

In irritation, he used his stick to sweep her legs. The brunette fell back. He tried to hit her, but she rolled away in time, the stick hit the floor hard. She kicked him in his face. Alfred noticed, with concern, that the fight was now real…

"What about you, Helena?" Dick moved the sick from one hand to the other as he walked around the room, "She gave you her life, and you have only been rude and violent; always challenging her."

"You've always played with her feelings," Helena growled.

"Love is a mystery; it takes time, sometimes you don't want to, but you hurt… We have been learning. We learn from our mistakes, because we want to keep going, we want to be together." Dick stood up in front of her, smirking "What about you? You betrayed her…"

The brunette froze, biting her lip.

He knew he had her now. "You told Quinn all the secrets of the Clock Tower, all about Wade, didn't you?... He is dead because of you."

She pounced on him. He stopped her and tried to punch her, but Helena was faster. She kicked him hard.

"Master Dick! Stop it!" Alfred shouted.

His back crashed against a rack that held towels, breaking it. He moved to the side to avoid another kick he grabbed her leg. Helena flew to the other side of the room.

He stood up to find Alfred in front of him, raising his hand. "Don't!"

"Alfred…" he warned.

"Move away, Alfred!" Helena shouted.

"Someone here needs to think with their head," the old man said to Dick. "Think of Miss Barbara."

He grimaced and glared to the brunette. Alfred was right.

"Let me kick his ass!" Helena growled.

"Miss Helena, please, go back to your training." He extended his arm in front of her to stop her. He knew she was stronger than him, but he also knew that she respected him too much to disobey.

"Okay," Dick threw the stick to the floor, "Just keep Barbara's pet away from me." He walked out of the training room.

"Pet? Son of a bitch!" The young woman tried to hit him, but Alfred stood in front of her.

"Miss Helena, please!" the butler said with a firm voice noticing her eyes were feral. "Miss Barbara would be angry if she knew you two had been fighting."

The brunette remained motionless for a few seconds, glaring toward the door. She wanted to kill that asshole. Finally, she shook her head and stepped back.

"He is an asshole," she mumbled, walking toward the bench. "Who the fuck does he think he is? Now he is trying to make me follow a schedule to come to the Clock Tower. What's next? Giving us a visitation schedule to see Barbara? Just Mondays at five?"

"I think he is trying to clarify some things." Alfred said.

"This is not his home! He doesn't have the right to make rules! He just uses her! He was never with her when she was suffering, dealing with… with the… fact that she would never be what she was. I was here! You were here, but not him!"

His face remained passive, waiting for the brunette to finish.

"We were here for her," Helena continued and sat on the bench to remove her gloves, "He is an asshole, he appears suddenly, after years, and he thinks he is the lord of the house. He acts as if all this is his. What is happening to her? Is she so blind? She just has eyes for him. And us?" She started to remove the bandages that covered her hands, "This is so unfair…"

"What if he moves to live here, with her?"

Helena opened her eyes wide. "No way!"

"Why not'"

"Alfred, no!" The brunette stood up and faced him, "He is not going to control my life here! He doesn't love her!"

"But she loves him," he explained softly.

"No!" Annoyed, Helena turned her back on him and began pacing.

"Why not?" Alfred was watching her carefully.

"Give me a break!" The brunette stormed toward the door. She was in a bad mood and she didn't want to keep listening to more stupid things.

He watched her go. Shaking his head, he smiled. He had opened a door that she didn't know existed in her heart.

The red head stretched her arms. Her headache had almost gone. She had called Alfred to tell him she would be at the library. Thankfully, Dick had been there because a strong headache hit her. She needed to be more careful to eat breakfast. Every time she went to work without eating, the headache came.

He'd driven her back to Clock Tower, but a mechanical problem had delayed them. He had fixed the car, but was filthy afterwards. When they arrived, Helena and Dinah were in the training room. She had wheeled toward her room and fallen asleep immediately while Dick showered in her bathroom.

She looked at her watch. She had slept almost two hours. Soft knocks at her door caught her attention.

"Come in."

The door slowly opened and Dick appeared. "Hi, how do you feel?"

"Fine," she smiled at him. "I'm sorry I was so rude and fell asleep, leaving you alone."

"Don't worry, I took a bath." He walked toward her. "Sorry, but I needed it."

"It's okay. Where were you? I thought you had gone."

"I went to the training room, I had an excellent match with Helena."

"Good." She rubbed her temples. "I'm feeling much better."

He sat next to her and touched her hand. "I want to talk to you."

"About?"

"About us."

She suddenly felt uncomfortable.

"I've been thinking that… maybe we…"

"Don't you think it's too soon?" she interrupted him, lacing her fingers with his.

"Soon?" he smirked. "We've known each other for over ten years, we have lived together; we're comfortable with each other… I'm so happy whenever you are near to me; I love you... We have great sex… what else do you want?"

She kissed his knuckles, he was right. But, the truth was, she wasn't sure if she wanted it. "I know, but… I need time, Dick; the changes in my life over the last years have been so fast. I'm happy you are back, but… I need to organize my thoughts."

"Take all the time you need. I'll be here." He leaned down and kissed her.

Suddenly, the door opened.

"Barbara, I need…" Helena stopped in her tracks. Damn, he was there.

"Do you know how to knock?" he asked, irritated.

"I didn't know you were here." She glared at him. "This is not your house."

"I told you to get used to seeing me here," the tall man stood up to face her, "and learn to respect the space of others."

"Hey…Stop!" Barbara waved her hand. "What's going on?"

"I need to talk to you," Helena answered, locking her eyes on Dick..

"Knock first."

"I never knock on Barbara's door."

"Well, learn to do it."

"Dick! Helena! Please," the red head sat up on the bed, "my headache is still lingering, I don't want it to get worse over your argument. "What's wrong, Helena?"

"Later, you are busy now." The brunette growled and walked out of the room, closing the door with a big slam.

Dick crossed his arms and looked at her, "She needs to learn to respect our space."

The redhead closed her eyes "Dick please…"

"This is precisely what I want to talk about." He sat next to her. "About us, about our space and about the girls."

Barbara frowned "What about the girls?"

"Look at what just happened."

"This is their home."

"I know, I know, but we need our own space."

"We have it."

"What if we were... And she suddenly comes in?"

"Dick… this is our home. I can't ask them to leave. They are my family."

"I want to be your family too."

Barbara touched his arm "Dick, please… I need to think, I need time."

"How much time?" he asked gently.

"Just give me time, okay?" She leaned over and kissed his lips. "I need it."

He didn't like the idea, but he nodded. "Anything you want."

She typed at the keyboard. Stopping her work, she removed her glasses. It was useless, she couldn't concentrate. She looked at her watch, almost two o'clock in the morning. She moved her chair back. Dick had been on her mind all day, he was pressing her so much. She didn't like to feel pressured.

She needed to consider her feelings and think about the consequences of her decision. The ClockTower was the girls' home. Dick was right, if they chose to live together, it would affect the girls. And that was unfair for them, Dinah and… Helena.

Maybe Helena's mood over the last few weeks had been because she was afraid of that, of things changing in her home. Because even though she 'lived' at her own place, she spent the most of the day here. Barbara smiled to herself. Not to mention that half of the brunette's clothes were scattered about the Tower

"Hi."

The redhead jumped in her place.

Shit.

Helena and her silent approaches would give her a heart attack one day.

"You're up late," the brunette said.

"I was finishing some work…" Barbara was glad to see her. The last couple of days they had been distant. They used to talk much, but things were changing and it bothered her. "What are you doing here? It's late. I thought you had gone home."

"I was on the balcony. I wasn't paying attention to the time. Sorry, I'll go now." She turned toward the elevator.

Barbara stopped her, taking her by her arm. "No, no… don't go. It's okay. What did you want to ask me this afternoon?"

"Nothing important." The brunette lowered her head.

"Nothing? Come on, tell me."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Excuse me?" Barbara blinked.

"You barely talk to me." Blue eyes locked in green.

"Oh… I'm sorry, I've just been so busy…"

"With him."

Barbara frowned slightly. She understood where this was going. She understood Helena. She took the girl's hand. "Things are changing, Helena…"

"Are you thinking about living with him? Marrying him?" she asked in a whisper.

"We… we've been talking about that…" A shiver ran through the redhead's body.

"So it's true, eh?" The brunette felt a knot in her throat. She was so afraid to lose her; he was taking her away.

"We've just had been talking." Barbara rubbed her hands together nervously. "We haven't made a decision yet."

"And what about us?" Helena turned her back to the redhead, her fingers touched the screen next to her. She was afraid to lose her. "Dinah… me."

"He is not going to change things between us."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

The lithe woman sighed before asking, "Do you think he will be okay with that?"

"Okay with what?" Barbara frowned.

"That things don't change between us."

"He is not going to dictate my life. This is our home, Dinah lives here, you can come here any time you want."

"I think you should ask him first."

"Ask him what? It's my decision. He is not going to make decisions for me."

"Maybe you've forgotten that you are going to be a couple, you won't be alone anymore. You need to think of him too, before making a decision." The girl lowered her lashes and walked toward the elevator.

"Helena, wait!" The redhead took her arm. Something was wrong. "What happened? He said something to you?"

The younger woman squeezed her eyes shut before opening them once again turning to face her partner. She didn't have the right to take away her happiness. That was selfish. "No. Why?" she finally said.

"Why are you saying all of this?"

"I'm just thinking. If you are with him, things can't be the same. Not because you don't want it to be the same…. but…you share your life with another person and you can't ignore what he wants. A couple is two people, not one."

The redhead stared at her in silence. She was right, but Dick would never try to separate her from them or…?

Helena lowered her face and touched Barbara's hand; she caressed the back of her hand with her thumb. Her fingers were delicate, her skin soft. Slowly, she raised her eyes, her firm abdomen, her perfect breasts, her delicate neck. She looked at her; the woman was so beautiful. Red hair, perfect nose; wonderful green eyes that make her knees tremble; her lips red. She was so perfect, so tempting. God! She wanted just lean down and kiss her.

Helena blinked and pulled back slightly.

Speechless, she stared at the other woman.

Kiss her?

"We haven't made a decision yet," the red head said.

Helena tried to focus. Shit. Kiss her?

Barbara frowned; her protégée was looking at her with a mix of horror, fear and surprise. "Helena?"

Oh damn! She was in love! The brunette hadn't planned that. She was a free spirit. A woman who loved her independence.

"Helena, are you okay?"

The young woman released her hand as if she'd been shocked and stepped back.

"What?" Barbara asked, watching her protégée in confusion.

"I…. I gotta go." The young crime fighter avoided meeting her eyes.

"Are you okay?" her mentor asked, reaching for the younger woman's hand.

Helena pulled jerked her hand away.

"Helena? What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry... I'm tired. I gotta… go, see you tomorrow." The brunette went to the elevator in a hurry.

Barbara wanted to stop her, to tell her not to go, but the words died in her throat. Helena disappeared behind the elevator's doors. Silence filled the ClockTower. Staring at the elevator, she found that she was suddenly feeling very empty.


	6. Chapter 6

The brunette looked at the city below her feet. With her hands in her pockets, she tried to understand what had happened. Maybe she was just a bit hormonal… but… every time she thought of seeing Barbara; butterflies filled in her stomach and her heart started to beat harder.

She was in love… with someone she never expected. With the person who had taken care of her for years. How could she not have realized…?. It was wrong. She would disappoint Barbara. She crouched down and grabbed her head in her hands. It was so confusing.

Now what was she supposed to do?

Barbara was worried. Helena was becoming more and more distant. Physically, she was avoiding the Clock Tower, and when she was there, she spoke few words.

She was clearly jealous of Dick, afraid that would take her space. And, worse, she'd turned extremely aggressive in her fighting and that was dangerous.

She typed at her keyboard. They were trying to rescue a kidnapped girl, daughter of one of the most important businessmen in the city. She followed the clues to a place outside of New Gotham. "They are on your left. Careful."

Got it. Dinah said. I just knocked out two here. 

Green eyes followed the movement of her protégées on the screen. Helena was on the rooftop of the small building.

I can see them. the brunette responded. Two playing cards at a table. One in front of a door and another two at the window… and two more around back. 

"Maybe the girl is behind the closed door." 

Must be…I can't see her. 

Be ready. Oracle's voice said.

Huntress looked though the skylight. "I am…" Her eyes turned feral. She turned to face a man, who was running toward her with a big axe in his hands. She ducked and the man stumbled, falling through the skylight.

"Shit," she growled. "Change of plans… Dinah, inside now!"

The brunette jumped through the hole that the criminal had created in the skylight. She dropped onto the table, surprising the men inside. Before they could react, she kicked two of them in the face, swinging her leg around, and jumped back.

The door opened and Dinah appeared. She raised her hand and pushed a big man back with her telekinesis.

Helena hit another man on his head. "The girl, Dinah! Get the girl!"

The blonde followed her instructions and ran toward the door. She opened it with a blast of her power. A small girl was curled up in a corner with her hands tied and her eyes blindfolded. "Bastards," she mumbled, running toward the child.

The kid moved back, scared. Dinah removed the cloth covering her eyes and talked to her softly. "It's okay, I'm gonna take you back to your mom. You're safe."

"Mommy?"

"Yes," Dinah hugged the girl and lifted her easily. "I've got her, Oracle."

I'm calling the police now. 

Get out of here! I'm covering you! Huntress shouted over the mic.

The blonde ran out of the room toward the exit. Huntress was dealing with five big guys.

"She needs back up, Oracle," the blonde said ,crossing the entrance door. "I'll get the girl somewhere safe and come back to help her."

No! Stay with her! Keep her safe! Huntress growled I'm having fun. 

"There's too many, Oracle," Dinah insisted, holding the girl against her.

Focus on your mission, Dinah, Oracle instructed.

The brunette knocked out one of the thugs with her fist. "One down." She turned and kicked other guy in his gut, "This will take some time to heal."

Strong arms wrapped around her from behind. She lifted her legs and kicked the guy in front of her. The brunette pushed herself back with her legs, knocking the man holding her against the wall. The old wall broke under their weight. They fell and crashed through the weak wood floor, falling to the floor below.

Huntress? Are you okay? 

After a few seconds of silence, the men above picked up their guns.

"Kill her!" the boss shouted.

The men looked through the hole, trying to find the brunette.

"Can you see her?" asked one.

"No."

Suddenly, a shadow jumped from the hole and hit him. "Miss me?" Huntress grinned. She moved quickly and disarmed the guy next to him.

A man was going to punch her, when a something fell on top of him. Huntress turned in annoyance, Nightwing was knocking out two of _her_ bad guys. Another man charged at her, but she knocked him out easily. After a few seconds, all the criminals were unconscious on the floor.

The brunette glared at Nightwing. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"You're welcome." The tall man grinned.

You needed back up. Oracle said. I asked him to stay close. 

"What? I don't need a nanny!"

Huntress! 

"Okay, let's get something straight." The young crime fighter pointed at Nightwing. "This is my city. I do the fighting."

"This has always been my city, too." Nightwing crossed his arms. "You're going to see me here often."

"I see," Helena crossed her arms. "You exchanged your pink stockings for black ones, and after all these years, you come back to claim what you left behind, including Barbara…"

"Don't go there," Dick growled to her.

"What's wrong? The truth hurts?"

Huntress, Nightwing, stop! Oracle almost shouted. Get out of there, the police are arriving. 

"Fine." The brunette clenched her teeth and turned, jumping through the skylight.

Barbara listened the police report. The girl had been rescued after two long days. They'd picked her up from a safe place after a mysterious phone call. All the criminals had been caught and, strangely, all had been found beaten and unconscious.

The door of the elevator opened. Helena stormed out. Dinah followed her with quick steps.

"I know what you're going to say," Helena growled. "I was too hard on superhero boy, right? He swooped in out of nowhere, dropped into_ my_ fight. Who does Dick think he is?"

Barbara removed glasses and watched Helena pace in agitation. "It was the kid's life. I needed to be sure the girl would be safe."

"Did you send him there as back up, without telling us?" Dinah asked, stunned.

Helena stood in front of her mentor, feeling her blood boil. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"You're stubborn! I wasn't sure how many guys were there. I wanted that kid safe."

"So now you don't trust us?" Helena shouted, raising her arms in exasperation. She resumed her pacing.

"I trust you two completely."

"So?" Dinah asked her, "Why did you send him?"

Barbara sighed and leaned back in her chair, looking at them. "It looks like we'll be working together."

"What?" the teen blinked.

"No way!!" Helena pointed at her. "I'm not going to work with him!"

"You should be grateful. I saved your ass today." Dick suddenly emerged from the elevator.

"I had everything under control."

"Sure." The dark haired man walked toward Delphi, removing his mask.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Helena turned to face him.

"Exactly what I was going to ask you." Dick crossed his arms over his chest. "You're only thinking of yourself! Barbara was thinking about what was best for that child."

"Listen to me, wonder boy," the brunette faced him, "We've been working in this business for over five years, while you were hiding I don't know where."

"Be careful, Helena." The man clenched his jaw.

"We don't need any more people here. Why don't you go back to your place and let us work?"

"Stop!" Seeing a fight brewing, Barbara moved her chair between the two.

"You must tell us! We are a team."

"Yes, _we_ are a team." Dick said ironically, "I'm glad you finally understand it. It's what's best for all of us."

"Shut up…" The young crime fighter wanted to smash his face. He just shows up after all these years and now he "knows" what's the best for them.

"Please!" Barbara pleaded. "I wanted what was best for the girl. Any help was useful."

"And your boyfriend is the best? Now we have to adopt all of your…?" Helena closed her mouth before finishing.

Dick stepped towards Helena, he was going to close her mouth for her. Barbara raised her arm and stopped him. This was not his problem and Helena had crossed the line again.

"She needs to learn to respect you!" Dick wanted to defend the redhead.

"I don't need any help. Could you please leave us alone?" Green eyes turned and glared at deep blue ones.

"But I…" 

"Please." Barbara said firmly, without taking her eyes off of Helena.

In a bad mood, the Dick walked toward the elevator. When the doors closed, Barbara spoke: "All my what Helena?"

The brunette remained silent and looked everywhere but at her mentor.

"My what, Helena? Finish it!"

Helena's lips trembled with anger.

"My lovers? Is that what you were going to say? Is that it? You know I would never do that! You disappoint me!"

"He doesn't have right to be here now," the young woman spat out. "Why is he suddenly so important? Just because you need him, doesn't mean we need him too."

"What's wrong with you? He was helping."

"I don't need any help!"

Dinah interrupted, trying to calm things a bit. "You should have told us, Barbara, we always talk before making a decision. I think Helena is angry, not because he was there, but because you were going to bring him on the team without telling us."

"I haven't made a decision yet." Barbara took a deep breath. "I'm thinking about it."

"You said…"

"I said 'It looks like we'll be working together.' But I'm not sure yet, Dick has his own style and we have our own."

"Why did you send him without tell us?" Helena asked.

"He arrived here after you two had gone. I told him what was happening and he offered to go and be there just in case. I said yes, I was thinking of the child. What's wrong with that?"

"I'm not going to work with him. Forget it. This isn't his place." The brunette shook her head. She never expected the redhead's next words.

"And what if I decide to be with him indefinitely, Helena?"

Dinah watched Helena's face pale.

"Tell me. What are you going to do?" Barbara insisted. "Are you going to choose? Because I don't want to choose. I won't do it."

It was worse than a punch directly to the young crime fighter's solar plexus.

"I'll be around." Dinah said in a soft voice and walked away, knowing they needed to talk alone.

The redhead played with her fingers. She took her time, she wasn't sure how to say everything that was on her mind. When Dinah disappeared upstairs, her voice was almost a whisper, but she was sure Helena's sensitive hearing could pick up her voice.

"I think I love him."

The brunette felt her knees buckle, tried to swallow the hard knot in her throat.

"I wish you two could have a good relationship," Barbara explained. "We are trying, I wish you were happy for me."

Helena looked at her, feeling as if the floor was swallowing her. How could she tell Barbara that she wanted her to be happy? How could tell her she loved her and would die for her? How could she tell her so many things that she felt, but that she'd never know?

"It would be much easier for me, that way." Barbara whispered "After Wade I… I thought…"

The brunette was ashamed. He was gone. Quinzel knew about him because of her. His death had been a terrible blow to her mentor. She kneeled in font of the redhead, resting her hands on her knees. "Barbara…"

"You're very special to me, Helena," the redhead took the slim hands in her own and caressed them with her thumbs: they were soft, perfectly manicured; hard to believe they could kill so easily. She raised her laced hands and surprising Helena, she gave her fingers a long and soft kiss.

"You will always be special to me," the red head said. "Dick won't change the things between us."

The brunette stood and met Barbara eyes. She moved her hand between the redhead's fingers and cupped her cheek. She was so beautiful, she wanted to lose herself in that heavenly green, taste those red lips.

Barbara felt herself struggling for air. Helena's face, a few inches from her own, her incredible eyes changed in front of her from a deep blue to a powerful gold. She was a really sensual woman; her small nose, her perfect lips.

Helena leaned toward her, slowly, closing her eyes.

Barbara's heart beat harder, she thought, feared and… hoped? that the younger woman would kiss her? She closed her eyes and felt the fine hairs of the other woman's cheek against hers, listened to Helena's soft breathing. The young woman's smooth lips met her cheek.

"I'm sorry…" Helena whispered in her ear. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

The brunette slowly moved back, breaking the spell. Barbara opened her eyes; her breath was heavy. The young woman stepped away and departed without another word.

The redhead, speechless, remained motionless. She hadn't kiss her… she was a bit disappointed about that. She raised her hand and touched her cheek; she could still feel the warm touch of Helena's lips against her. Suddenly, the older woman blinked, what the hell she was thinking?

Helena?

She shook her head, to clear it, and brushed her hair back. She wheeled toward the kitchen, she needed some strong coffee.

The brunette distractedly watched the people on the dance floor as she sat at a lonely table in a dark corner of the bar. Flashing colored lights morphed and swirled overhead. A tequila bottle next to her, a cup in her right hand, she moved her head to the rhythm of the music.

She swallowed the entire contents of the glass and poured another shot. Finally, after the third bottle, she was numbed a bit from the alcohol. This was one of those moments when it disgusted her to be meta; it was hard get drunk. She'd been trying to forget her feelings for Barbara, unsuccessfully.

And now, Barbara told her that she was in love with Dick.

It was like have a burning knife buried in her heart.

It hurt like hell.

She swallowed another shot of alcohol in one gulp.


	7. Chapter 7

"What am I supposed to do?" The redhead put her cup of coffee on the table.

"Well, both have terrible tempers. I think they're going to have to learn not to see you as part of their territory." Alfred laced his hands behind his back.

"Excuse me?" She turned to see him.

"Master Dick is very possessive, he is a bit jealous of the time Miss Helena has spent with you. You and she are very close, and I'm sure he would like to be the one so close to you…. Miss Helena, well, you know her, she's always been glued to your side. It's natural that she feels he is trying to take you away from her."

"Helena has her own place, no one can replace her. We've grown together, supporting each other in the worst times of our lives… and Dick… well, Dick is different. Dick is… a man."

"Obviously," he smirked, cleaning the fridge with a cloth.

"I'm trying to say that my relationship with him shouldn't be some sort of rivalry for them. They're different feelings." The redhead rubbed her eyes.

"Yes, but both have possessive personalities and you need to deal with it before they kill each other." He moved toward the counter and, folding the cloth, he put it down.

"Maybe you're right." She stopped in front of him. "Dick is tense every time Helena is around and she's been acting so strangely the past few days. I think she is avoiding me."

"Maybe you need to talk with both of them about all of this."

"I'm trying. It's hard. Dick wants to start a serious relationship."

"That is good, no?" Alfred asked, pressing her.

The older woman sighed. "I don't know."

"Is Master Dick here?"

"I asked him to let me talk with the girls alone and he left. I'm glad, I need time alone. I never expected this, I mean, Dick and I now, all this is happening so fast…"

"Fast? After ten years?" he mocked. "You have a strange concept of speed.."

She picked up her coffee. "It's not an easy decision. Helena is right about one thing, it will affect them, she and Dinah."

"Miss Barbara, I can tell you that if they love you, they will do anything to make you happy. Master Dick knows you have a whole life around the girls, especially Miss Helena, and he must accept that. Miss Helena must accept that he is the love of your life, and you need to live your own life."

"Sounds good, but do you think those two will do it?"

"I doubt it."

"Me too."

-------------------------

_**Stupid Dick Grayson.**_

Helena poured herself another shot. The loud music in the bar made it impossible to think—something she was entirely grateful for at the present time.

When she was younger and felt sad or alone, just lying on the redhead's bed was comforting, like being in a warm cocoon. Barbara found her sleeping in her bedroom many times. The older woman had just climbed into bed without waking her. Every time Helena woke next to her, she'd felt an incredible joy inside.

Now she understood the feeling.

The discovery of her feelings toward the redhead had hit her like a big rock on the head, stunning her. She understood at that moment why she wasn't comfortable with Reese; she just wanted to be with Barbara; she understood why Dick annoyed her so much, he was touching, sleeping with _her_woman.

_**Fucking Dick Grayson.**_

Afterwards, there was guilt. She'd known Barbara since she was a child, she had been her mentor, her protector, her friend; she had comforted her, guided her, as her mother would do… she felt like a pervert.

Finally had come the acceptance, Barbara was a mature woman, and she was no longer a child. She was a strong young woman, with feelings, needs. In the years after her mother's death, she had been confused, rebellious, with so much anger. She had her first sexual experiences with men and women.

She remembered her first time with a woman; she had never thought of herself as bi, but the woman was gorgeous and Helena was young and still confused by her mother's death. The seduction had been easy. She was sure Barbara didn't know about it and she would never know.

After that, her experiences had been as nice and as pleasurable as with men. And now, the thought of being with Barbara had become a fantasy. In the last few months, since she had discovered her feelings for the redhead, the dreams had burned themselves into her mind.

And they were marvelous.

Barbara was incredibly smart and could talk about anything. Politics, history, even stupid things like old TV shows. She was perfect. Her skin was so soft. Her teeth so white, and every time she smiled, the room lit up.

The one thing that had always affected Helena the most was her smell. She smelled like orange and cinnamon, and that smell always made her feel relaxed, secure, safe or… excited, terribly excited. The redhead was unbelievably sexy… and there were those little things that turned her on, like when she wrinkled her nose just so….or her expression. Sometimes she looked at her and the only thing Helena wanted was jump on her and take her.

She closed her eyes and let her head fall to the table.

She dreamed about her confident touch, feeling her skin under her fingers, tasting those lips that seemed to be so soft. Losing herself in touches and feelings, smells and flavors, feeling Barbara's long, delicate fingers demanding, teasing.

-------------------------

Barbara stared vacantly at her bedroom ceiling. She couldn't get the image of Helena's eyes from hours before out of her mind. The soft brush of those lips against her cheek. Why were those images stuck in her mind?

She pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. She was worried, she didn't want a rift between them, after all they had been through together. She needed to find a way to settle things. She closed her eyes and tried to sleep.

Again the image of Helena's feral eyes looking at her so intensely appeared.

Why?

-------------------------

"Hi, beautiful."

The brunette lifted her head and opened her eyes slowly; who was bothering her?

"May I sit?" a tall blonde woman asked; she was holding a wine glass.

Helene looked her up and down; the woman had long hair. Her eyes were deep blue. She looked like a model out of a magazine. She was really stunning.

The brunette nodded and took another shot; after all, maybe she needed a bit of every day conversation.

"My name's Josie."

"Helena." She poured more tequila in her glass.

"I hope I'm not bothering you." The woman sipped her wine.

"No, it's okay, I'm just drinking."

"I know, I've been watching you."

Helena raised her brow and looked at the woman, smirking "Watching me?"

"Yes, I've never seen someone drink that much alcohol and still be standing."

"Well," the brunette laughed, "I don't know if I can stand up now."

"Are you trying to forget your boyfriend?" Josie smiled, winking at her and finished her glass of wine.

"Nah! I'm just killing time."

"Nice jacket."

"Versace."

"You have good taste."

"Thanks."

"I've een you here before." Josie crossed her arms on the table. 

"I like this place." The brunette sipped her drink.

"I like this place too. It's cool and the music is great."

"Yes, the music is wonderful." Helena looked at the woman's empty glass and waved her hand toward her bottle, "Want some, Josie? Josie is your name, right?"

"Yes, sure."

Helena was comfortable with the strange woman. She needed something to distract her from the violence that surrounded her life and, more importantly, the source of her sadness: Barbara. The redhead was so straight.

After a few drinks, Josie stood up to dance; she invited the brunette, but Helena shook her head, she preferred to drink. Sipping a bit more of her tequila, she followed the other woman's movements.

Sexy.

Yes, definitely.

Helena had a better time that she ever imagined. Josie was fun. The two women laughed until the night club closed. The manager had to ask them both to leave. When Josie tried to stand up, everything around her moved.

"Whoa..." she mumbled.

"Hey, easy." 

"I think I'm drunk… But I think I can go home."

Helena realized that the blonde could barely stay on her feet. It wasn't a good idea to leave her alone. She was drunk, but not as much as the other woman. Meta-genetics, of course.

"Maybe I can call a cab," Helena offered.

"No, no, no," Josie shook her head, smiling. "I live two blocks from here. I can make it."

"Okay, so I'll help you to go the right way, ok?" The brunette knew it was late and the neighborhood wasn't in the best part of the city.

Her new friend nodded. Helena helped her stand up. The woman rested her head on the brunette's shoulder as she was guided down the sidewalk.

When they arrived at Josie's apartment, it was locked as she had said. Her place was on the second floor. The young crime fighter looked for the keys inside Josie's bag and opened the lock.

"We're here."

Josie leaned and surprised the brunette by kissing the back of her neck softly. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"You are so nice." Another kiss to her neck made the brunette move her head lightly to the other side.

"Josie…" Helena hadn't planned on an adventure that night. She wasn't in the mood for it.

"Sorry, I was just trying to thank you." The next kiss was on her ear. Shit. That was her most sensitive spot.

"Listen…" A soft, warm tongue circled the inside of her ear. The brunette tried to move back, but the woman wrapped her arms around her and soft lips were on her neck.

"You are so beautiful." Josie's hand cupped the young woman's breast suddenly and kneaded it firmly. She didn't want to let her go. The touch worked, as she felt Helena's sharp intake of breath. Immediately, she pressed her lips against the brunette, her tongue pushing against soft lips.

Helena's knees trembled as she opened her mouth and lost herself in the sensation of the demanding strokes. The blonde pushed her gently inside the apartment and put her against the wall, closing the door.

"You smell so good…" Josie's free hand cupped the brunette's head, "and you are so sexy."

Helena had always been the aggressive one, but being passive was not so bad, she decided. It was just "different" and fun. Feeling wanted was arousing her. Fierce lips were on her mouth again, kissing her hungrily. Helena returned it with the same passion. Tongues played; she wrapped her arms around her new "friend".

"I've watched you for so long…" Josie mumbled, "thinking of a way to talk to you…" the hand on her breast moved down, "to be with you…"

"Yeah?" the brunettes asked in a hoarse voice. Suddenly, Josie's hand cupped her crotch and thrusted; she growled.

"I want you, Helena," the blonde whispered, licking the shell of her ear.

"Josie…"

The tall woman placed her thigh against the back of her hand to thrust more forcefully. Helena cupped Josie's head with her hand and kissed her roughly while the other woman kept a firm, steady rhythm and flexed her own pelvic muscles.

Helena took the other woman's wrist, trying to stop her movement. She closed her eyes, trying to steady her breath and avoiding looking at the woman with eyes that now were feral.

Josie breathed heavily and buried her head in the brunette's neck, biting it softly. "Helena? What's wrong?... Don't you like this?" she thrust against the younger woman once more.

Helena couldn't avoid the moan that escaped.

The brunette swallowed before speaking in a hoarse voice: "Where's your room?"

-------------------------


	8. Chapter 8

The first thing that Helena did, upon arriving at the ClockTower, was to assault the fridge. She buried her head inside of it, looking for something to eat. It had been an unexpected and fantastic night. Maybe not much sleep, but she had burned a lot of energy and frustration.

"Rough night?" Alfred asked, walking in the kitchen.

"Fun. Where is the milk?"

"I just bought some." He lifted the grocery bag in his hand and pointed at the table. "I prepared pancakes. Sit, Miss Helena." Alfred showed her a covered plate on the table.

"Great! I'm starved." The brunette obeyed immediately.

"Rough night?" Barbara asked, wheeling into the room. She was happy to see her protégé there.

Helena rolled her eyes as she stabbed a pancake with her fork. "Why did you two ask if I had a rough night?"

"When you come here so early and hungry, you've usually had a rough night." Barbara smiled lightly, stopping her chair on the other side of the table. Alfred gave her a cup of coffee. "Thanks."

Helena bit an obscenely large piece of pancake off her fork. Alfred shook his head and gave her a plate.

"I'll be right back," he said , as Helena took another bite of her pancake.

Barbara took the cup of coffee in her hands and watched the brunette eat. When the butler was at safe distance, she asked distractedly, "Was it Reese?"

"Huh?" Helena asked with her mouth full of pancake.

"Were you with Reese last night?"

The young woman coughed. "No… why?"

"So… who was he?" The redhead put her cup on the table.

"Well…." Helena cleared her throat, trying to figure out what to say.

"... or who was she?"

The brunette blinked. What?

Barbara smiled in amusement, crossing her arms on the table, "I know you are… open about your preferences."

Helena swallowed, feeling the pancake in her mouth turn to rock. "Did you know…?"

"Always."

"Oh…" The brunette didn't know what to say. It was supposed to be one of her biggest secrets…. And Barbara knew!

"So…" Barbara picked up her coffee again and sipped it. "And how was it?"

"Oh… well…" This was one of those moments when the brunette wanted one of their enemies to strike her down with a laser and disintegrate her.

"Is that the reason you broke up with Reese?"

"Did you know…?" What a stupid question, Barbara knew everything; she was a detective, Oracle, master of all information…. Of course, she knew.

"You are so transparent sometimes," Barbara chuckled.

"Am I?" Another stupid question. Why did she always say stupid things when Barbara cornered her?

Barbara cleared her throat, "Is she your girlfriend?"

"No!" Helena blurted out quickly.

Barbara was relieved. "Oh… so…?"

Blue eyes locked on green. Well, now what, smart ass? She had a real problem. Was there an easy way to explain to Barbara that she sometimes picked up strange girls at bars and had great sex?

"Morning." Dinah smiled, wandering in.

This was the first time that Helena was happy to have Dinah interrupt a conversation with Barbara.

"Wow, Helena!" the blonde exclaimed, looking at her plate with four pancakes on it. "Rough night?"

Great. Now she fucked up everything again. "I just went to drink at a bar, okay?"

Barbara and Dinah exchanged a knowing look. The young crime fighter, annoyed, leaned back in her chair.

"We're off tonight, Helena." Dinah said, sitting at the table, "I told Barbara we could go to dinner."

"A new restaurant opened on 75th." Barbara wiped her mouth with a napkin. "I thought it would be a good idea to have some fun. We've been working so much the last few weeks."

"Uhm… sorry, I can't…" The brunette moved her fork towards another pancake.

Barbara frowned and took a few seconds before asking, "No?"

"I… I'm going to dinner with a friend."

"Ohhhhh… who is it?" Dinah asked curiously.

"A friend." Helena growled.

"Possible new boyfriend? Or girlfriend?"

The brunette coughed.

Shit. She knew, too? Her damn life couldn't have any secrets? Her appetite was suddenly gone.

Dinah winked at Barbara. "Definitely a new girlfriend."

The redhead glared at her. "Dinah!" She didn't like the idea of Helena having a girlfriend.

"She's coughing, I nailed it!"

Amused, the butler listened to the conversation as he cleaned the equipment in the lab.

-------------------------

A few days later, Barbara looked in her drawer for her t-shirt; Dick had asked her to stay last night, but she wasn't in mood, so she'd excused herself with a headache. Helena's new 'acquisition' in her love life had her worried. She had seen her kissing Reese like she wanted to eat him –and she had wanted kill him because Helena was a bit exhibitionist and he didn't stop her. Otherwise, he seemed to enjoy it, like that night at the bar. She would prefer them to be more discreet.

However, now it seemed she was dating a girl. She found a T-shirt and put it on.

A girl.

She shook her head, she just didn't get it. She'd never been attracted to women. She'd never thought about it. She knew that Helena was.. open minded.. about her sexual preferences and wasn't known for long relationships, but… How could a woman be with a woman? She just didn't get it.

Helena was a wonderful girl, but she could be the complete opposite of Barbara herself: she smoked, wore leather, she loved to drink, party, listen to loud music… girls. She shook her head, she needed to focus on work before starting her workout. She was thinking about her protégée too much lately.

-------------------------

"Are you ready?" Helena asked Dinah, wrapping her hands for their session.

"Let me change.. two minutes," the blonde called out, running to her room.

"Hurry up, kid." The brunette finished bandaging her hands and closed her fingers to test it. Yes, the wrap was perfect. She heard the familiar 'humm' of Barbara's electric chair; she looked down. The redhead was wheeling to the Delphi. She looked great, she was wearing that top that made her look verrrry sexy. She smirked.

The sun was setting, the last rays filled the interior of the Clock Tower with a marvelous orange color that make Barbara's hair bright; and she looked dammed sexy in that tank top. The contours of her face were delicate, elegant. She wondered how it would feel touch her breast that looked so soft, but firm.

Kiss her.

The sound of the elevator door opening, broke the spell. Dick walked in. She stepped back so he wouldn't see her.

"Hi, love." Dick hugged Barbara, crossing his arms around her neck.

"Hi," she said, forcing a smile. She wasn't in the mood. Dick was nice, but sometimes she felt he didn't let her breathe.

He rubbed his cheek against hers. "I missed you."

"Me too."

He took her chin in his fingers and kissed her.

Upstairs, Helena bit her lip; she clenched her fist and angrily walked toward the training room.

-------------------------

"Okay! I get it!! Now let me go!" Dinah growled, face down in the training room. Helena was on her.

The brunette laughed and jumped back. They had been practicing for almost two hours. The exercise helped her burn lots of energy.

Hands clapped at the entrance of the gym. Both girls turned. Barbara was there. Helene opened her mouth in surprise. Damn, the woman looked gorgeous, she was wearing bike shorts. She never wore bike shorts.

"Excellent, Dinah. You're improving," the redhead complimented.

The blonde snapped her fingers in front of Helena, the brunette blinked.

"She almost broke my arm." Dinah moved her shoulder. "Where is the improvement?"

"You prevented her from breaking it." Barbara furrowed her brow and looked at the brunette. "Something wrong, Helena?"

"Uh… well… Nice shorts."

"Yeah, I bought them last week. I knew you would like them." The redhead smiled, wheeling toward the other side of the gym. "It's time for my workout, are you coming?"

The young woman nodded and followed her.

"I'm gonna go take a shower," Dinah called as she left the room.

Barbara transferred herself from her wheelchair to the mat; it was time for her therapy, to keep her legs strong. She leaned back.

Helena dried herself with a towel before starting. Barbara laid back, her eyes on Helena, while the brunette was distracted. She had pretty good abs, lovely figure... and sweaty, well, her body looked spectacular.

Helena turned and rested a knee on the bottom of the mat, taking one of Barbara's legs. She began to flex it back and forth slowly. This was her favorite time in the gym. She could touch her secret love, the muscles and skin under her hands for a long hour; touching and feeling soft, firm skin, feet, ankles, thighs.

"Is she beautiful?" A soft voice pulled her from her thoughts.

"What?" Blue eyes blinked.

"Your new girlfriend, is she beautiful?" Barbara asked curiously, watching the younger woman's hands move. She wished she could spontaneously acquire some sensation below her waist to know those agile fingers felt working on her.

Helena blushed. "She's not my girlfriend."

"No? You're dating her."

"Well… she is nice. I've seen her a only a few times." She took the other leg.

Barbara raised her brow. Helena dating the same person more then one day? It could only mean a new romance. She was a beautiful, wild and sexy woman. It was normal that she closed one door and another one opened immediately. She could choose her next lover, female or male; she didn't have to look for it.

"That's a record for you." She said ironic. "Are you thinking about marrying her?"

The brunette rolled her eyes. "Barbara!"

"You sleep with her, no?"

Helena was uncomfortable. How was she supposed talk about how she had fucked an strange girl to the woman she loved? How was she supposed to tell her she was trying to kill the feelings that were inside her? She lowered her head, ashamed; she was drowning in her own pain and had tried to calm the fire burning her heart with another woman, to escape of her feelings. She resumed her motions on her mentor's thigh. "Can we change the subject?"

"Have you thought about having a real relationship, Helena?" Barbara softened her voice "Maybe that's what you need."

"Sometimes you can't have the things you want."

The older woman took the deceptively strong hand, stopping her motions. She stared into blue eyes. "What do you want?"

"Something I can never have," Helena said, almost in a whisper, rubbing her thigh.

Barbara sat up. The brunette felt a shiver run through her body. Those green eyes were piercing her. Shit. What if she could read what was she feeling?

Her knees weakened at the next question. "What is that, Helena?"

"Hi!" Dick said, walking inside the training room in his black exercise suit.

Helena closed her eyes. At least the big asshole rescued her this time.

"Hi." Barbara smiled "Did you get your research done on the Delphi?"

"Yes, it was easy."

"Are you going to workout?"

"No, I came here to help you with your therapy."

Helena narrowed her eyes, glaring at him. Now what did the wonder ass have in mind?

The redhead blinked n surprise. "What?"

"I want to help you, he explained, putting his towel on a bench. "Helena's done this for years. If I'm going to be with you, I want to help you. Helena is not going to be here all her life."

Barbara looked at the brunette.

"She needs a trained person," Helena said, not bothering to hide her annoyance.

He smirked and walked toward them. He waved his hand. "Excuse me. Let the expert work."

The brunette took a deep breath and moved back. He stood up between Barbara's legs and took her left ankle in his hands.

"This is personal work." He smiled and started moving his hands.

To Barbara's surprise and Helena's, he was doing correct the routine.

"You know how…?" Barbara asked.

"I've been taking private classes. I wanted to surprise you."

Helena suppressed an angry growl.

Dick turned to look at Helena. "You can go, if you want, and don't worry about her therapy. I'll do it now."

"Dick, I…" Barbara said, reading the brunette's face. She knew Helena had been feeling rejected lately; she didn't want to push further away.

He leaned over and took her hand, kissing it. "I want to do it, Babs. I want to be with you forever."

"Fine, she's yours," the brunette growled and picked up her towel in irritation.

"Helena, wait!" the redhead said.

"You don't need me, he's here." She cut her off. "Maybe, if he wants it, Dinah can move to my place and we'll make our own team since it seems we are off of yours."

"Listen to me, that is the last time you speak to her so disrespectfully!" Dick faced her. "If you don't want to respect her, I'll show you…"

"Show me! Come on!" Helena threw the towel to the floor, ready to fight. "You were only my dad's puppy dog."

"Son of…!" He walked threateningly toward her.

"Dick, no!" Barbara grabbed his wrist.

"Someone needs to teach this kid some manners."

"Kid, my ass."

"Helena, stop right now!"

The brunette glared at her. "You can keep your wonder boy." She picked up her towel from the floor. "It's clear that you don't need us anymore."

"You're right, she doesn't need you!" Dick shouted, watching her leave the room.

"Dick, shut up!" Barbara pulled his arm to get his attention.

"What?"

"You don't have any right to say those things to her! She's always been there for me." She released his arm and looked for her wheelchair.

"I'm here now," the tall man exclaimed. "You don't need her and her bad moods."

She glared at him. "And that means I should forget my family?"

"She is not family!"

"She is my family, Dinah is my family and Alfred is my family. And if you don't like it, the door is open. Got it?" Barbara moved herself to the chair.

"She is always challenging you!"

"I can handle my problems with her by myself, I've always done it and I don't need any help. Understand? I don't want you interfering in my life."

"I'm part of your life now!" Dick said exasperated.

"So respect it, and don't try to change it." She wheeled furiously out of the gym to look for Helena.

-------------------------


	9. Chapter 9

Josie swallowed the last of her beer. She was seated on a comfortable couch in a far, dark corner of the bar, listening to the loud music. Few people were in the place. She put the empty glass the table. A hand took hers. She lifted her eyes and found deep blue orbs regarding her.

After her discussion with stupid Dick 'Ass' Grayson, she had flown from the Clock Tower. Barbara had tried to stop her. She heard her calling, but she didn't want to talk anymore. Surely, she would lecture her for calling Dick a "puppy dog." She needed to burn energy, anger, frustration, and loneliness.

"Helena, what a…" Before she could finish, lips crashed against her, demanding. Helena moved and straddled her; one hand to the back of her head and the other moved below the blonde's skirt.

Josie laughed, moving back and catching Helena's wrist. "Are you in a hurry?"

The young woman grinned and kissed her again. The other woman kissed her back, wrapping her arms around her; she was wild and terribly sexy. Tongues danced until the brunette's fingers found their target. She growled.

"Oh my…" Josie gasped.

Helena trapped her lips again and pushed her against the couch, keeping the movement of her hand steady.

"Helena," Josie moved back, trying to focus "We're in public." 

"Mmm…" The young woman lowered her head and bit her neck.

The blonde felt trapped under the ministrations of those wonderful fingers and talented mouth. Helena seemed to be in heat, and the idea pleased her. She took dark hair in her fingers and lifted the brunette's head. "Do you wanna fuck?"

The young woman nodded with enthusiasm, grinning.

"All right, little one," Josie kissed her lips softly, "but not here. Can we go to my place?"

"Great."

-------------------------

She was on her bed, staring at the wall. She didn't like Dick. He thought that Barbara was his property; things had changed since she'd been with him. She had said it wouldn't happen, but it had.

Barbara seemed to be so happy with him. She was smiling again, after the loss of Wade. She didn't have the right to take away her happiness. Maybe it would be best to move away. Look for new opportunities, and forget that stupid feeling of love for her.

Knocks on her door interrupted her thoughts. She turned her head and checked the clock on her night table. Three AM, who the hell…? The bar had closed an hour ago. She stood up, wearing her pajama shorts and a small black tank top, and walked toward the door when the knocks sounded again.

"I'm coming," she said, "Who is it?"

"Barbara. I know it's late, but I need to talk to you."

The brunette closed her eyes. The thought of a lecture at midnight was not a pleasant one. Surely she was still angry because she had called wonder ass a 'puppy dog.' She took a breath and, turning on the light, she unlocked the door.

"Come in. Don't look around. I haven't cleaned yet, it's a bit early, you know?" The brunette opened the door and turned to her couch. She fell on it, sitting on her left leg. She crossed her arms. "What's wrong?"

The redhead looked around, the place was very Helena, clothes every where, empty glasses. An open bottle.

"Come in, the house won't bite."

"Looks like it might..." Barbara wheeled inside, closing the door behind her.

The brunette looked around. "Doesn't look so bad."

Barbara stopped her chair a few inches from Helena's knees, surprising her. The young woman nervously brushed her hair back.

"Listen," she said, "I'm sorry. I didn't want to bother you or insult Dick, I know that…"

Helena started to speak, but found Barbara's fingers on her lips.

"Shh… don't talk…" the older woman said.

"Huh?"

Barbara took the brunette's hands and caressed them with her thumbs. "Your hands are always soft."

"Oh…"

"I want to apologize for Dick's attitude."

The words eased the young woman; at least she wasn't here to kick her ass for bad behavior. She lifted her eyes to see her mentor; she looked gorgeous in that black sweater.

"He doesn't have the right to speak to you that way." Barbara lowered her gaze. "I talked to him."

"You talked to him?"

"I asked him not to touch you again…" Whispering, she lifted her face and looked at the brunette. "You are important to me. If he can't understand, that is his problem, not mine."

"I don't want be a problem for you."

"Don't you understand, Helena? I don't want to lose you, you are more important to me than he is."

Pinned by Barbara's eyes, the young woman swallowed.

"I asked him to leave and not come back…"

Helena was hypnotized by intense green eyes and the soft rubbing of the redhead's thumbs against her hands.

Barbara remained silent long seconds. "I told him I didn't love him."

Blue eyes blinked.

"Helena…"

"Huh?"

"I told him I love you."

The brunette eye's opened wide, trying to understand.

"I love you." Taking advantage, and not giving her opportunity to think, Barbara pulled her hands gently against her to close the distance between their faces.

Soft lips touched Helena's. The brunette closed her eyes, shocked. Barbara's mouth caressed her softly. She didn't want to move, afraid she was dreaming. Her heart began to beat faster. Shyly, she let the tip of her tongue move out to touch those lips that she had dreamed of tast tasting for so long.

Barbara moved back and lowered her head, ashamed. Helena, still in shock, opened her eyes trying to understand what was happening.

"I'm sorry," the older woman said. "I know you might never love me, but… I needed to kiss you."

Helena moved forward and cupping Barbara's head, she captured her lips, silencing her. "I love you, too. I wanted kiss you, too…" she whispered, kissing gently; she didn't want to scare the redhead. After a few seconds, she felt the redhead's tongue touching her lips, teasing. She opened her mouth and, in a moment, Barbara was in her. She moaned at the heavenly feeling.

She wrapped an arm around Barbara's waist and the other supported her head. She lifted the older woman, pulling her against her gently. She leaned back over the couch slowly, with Barbara on top of her.

"You love me?" Barbara asked in a husky voice, between kisses.

"You have no idea…"

"I want you."

Barbara's demanding hands left her in a haze of arousal. She was aware of nothing else. Her mouth was all over her. She had dreamed of this for so long--- having the other woman in her arms and loving her. She felt the redhead's hand cupping her breast through her bra. When had she lifted her shirt?

She moaned. The redhead moved to her neck and bit her pulse point. Helena moved her head to the side; it was marvelous.

She took Barbara's head in her hands and pulled her up, to kiss her again. The soft strokes turned her on. With incredible agility, the older woman unclasped her bra and touched the firm flesh with her palm. Helena growled. She closed her eyes hard, trying to recover her senses. Maybe they were moving too far, too fast.

"Barbara…" she cleared her throat, "I… I…"

Barbara grinned, pulling back slightly and kneading Helena's breast firmly. "You talk too much," she whispered, kissing the brunette again. "Give me a second, I'll be right back." The older woman lowered her head. Before the brunette realized what was happening, that marvelous mouth was taking possession of her breast.

"Oh my…" Golden cat eyes snapped open. The cyber genius was fast.

Helena moved her hand trying to remove the redhead's sweater, but her wrist was trapped by a strong hand.

"Not yet…" Barbara smiled at her, "I want you naked first..." The fingers of her right hand moved down the lithe body, slowly. "I want to touch you." She insinuated her hand under Helena's underwear. "I want to taste you…" Agile fingers moved under her underwear toward her…

Helena woke up abruptly, sitting up on her bed. Disconcerted, she looked around. She was in her room; in complete darkness. Shaking her head, she turned, looking for Barbara, where was she?

Shit.

"No…" she growled, letting herself fall back on her pillow. It was all a dream, she had been dreaming.

Fuck.

She closed her eyes a few seconds, trying to catch her breath. It had been so real. The sensations, the caresses, the touches, she was still aroused.

"Dammit!" Annoyed, she threw off her blankets and went toward her bathroom. She needed a cold shower.

-------------------------

Barbara wheeled down the sidewalk to the school parking lot, followed closely by Dinah. She had been calling Helena, unsuccessfully, since the incident yesterday. Dick had crossed the line. She was upset.

The blonde had never seen her mentor so irritated.

"I don't think this is going to work," the re head said. "He's trying to control my life and I hate that!"

"Maybe you need to talk to him."

"I already did. He doesn't understand, he is possessive and jealous. He tries to manage my life."

"What?"

"Helena and I had a hard life. We lived through some bad things, really bad things. We helped each other survive. Nothing can change that, not even him; and he doesn't understand that. He wants to be my everything and is trying push Helena away."

"Helena is not stupid. She knows that." Dinah opened the Hummer door. "She thinks he is stealing you. I saw it in her eyes; if she could, she'd kill him."

"I understand her." Barbara transferred herself to the car, "But I don't agree with her way of showing her discomfort. She's pretty rude."

"Tell me about it."

Dinah climbed in the passenger's seat and put on her seat belt. Barbara maneuvered the Hummer out of the parking lot.

"I'm trying to figure out how to solve this. I don't want to hurt either of them." The redhead pulled out onto the road.

"Maybe you need to lecture them both."

"I don't know, Dinah…" the older woman sighed.

The blonde turned to look at her guardian. "You don't know?"

"Sometimes I want to be alone."

The teen hesitated before speaking. "Alone?"

Barbara opened her mouth and then shut it. She bit her lower lip and sighed. "I feel that… something is missing."

"Missing?"

Barbara stopped the car at a red light. "I'm not sure… I feel like I lose my privacy when he's around. Maybe I just have to learn to live with someone again. I've been alone for years."

"You love him."

"I don't know now, Dinah, I'm confused." The older woman took a deep breath

Dinah lowered her head. "Take your time, he will understand, and Helena, too… and if they love you, they will accept whatever you choose."

The light changed.

"Alfred said the same thing. But they are really stubborn." Barbara smiled and hit the accelerator.

"Yes." Dinah laughed and turned her head. She saw a big truck next to Barbara's side ready to slam into them. "Watch out!" she shouted.

Barbara saw the truck, but before she could turn the steering wheel, it slammed into her side of the Hummer.

The sound of crushing metal and breaking glass filled the intersection. The truck pushed the Hummer several yards before the vehicle overturned and fell on its side.

Then there was nothing but silence.

----

3


	10. Chapter 10

"Alfred, where is she?" Helena rushed in to the waiting room of New Gotham Hospital. She was working at Dark House Bar when Alfred called her about the car accident.

The young woman had practically flown over the rooftops and arrived at the Hospital in less than fifteen minutes.

The old butler stood up and took her hand. The girl was upset and her eyes reflected her panic.

"Easy, Miss Helena, easy… She is in intensive care now."

The brunette put her hands on her head and brushed her hair back. She tried to think straight.

"What happened?"

"A truck didn't stop at the red light, she couldn't prevent the impact. It hit Miss Barbara´s side… She got the full impact. She had several bruises, her left leg is broken, as well as some ribs." He took a deep breath. "I'm not going to lie to you, the doctors are worried, she has a severe concussion."

"Shit…" Helena paced nervously.

"I'm sure she will be okay."

"Dinah?"

"Still in the emergency room, the doctor is bandaging her arm, as I told you, it's broken."

"Dammit…" Helena sat on a couch, her face in her hands. She couldn't even imagine a world without Barbara. She'd lost her mother already. Her heart was broken. The pain had been terrible. It still hurt her, even after eight years.

Barbara was her refuge, her home, her best friend.

Barbara saved her when she was drowning. If she hadn't been there, she would have killed her self. After her mother's death, she'd wished to sleep and never awake again.

Just die.

She didn't want to experience the cold feeling of solitude, emptiness again. She didn't want to lose the woman that she most loved in the world.

A tear ran down her cheek.

Alfred sat next to her and wrapped an arm around her, rubbing her back. She rested her head on his shoulder, crying.

"She'll be okay…" he comforted. "Don't worry."

-------------------------

The young woman sat in a corner of the room watching the redhead sleep. She hadn't moved from her side the two long days that she'd been unconscious. Alfred had tried to convince her go to rest, unsuccessfully. Dinah was at home, resting per doctor's orders. Dick, annoyed, needed to accept that the brunette was not going to leave the redhead alone.

Finally, the doctors removed the breather and announced she was recovering. The brunette felt a heavy weight lifted off of her shoulders. She fell asleep, exhausted, sitting on a small couch.

One of the nurses, opening the door to check Barbara's vitals, woke the brunette. It was sunrise.

The nurse smiled at her before leaving the room. Helena yawned, stretching her arms. She let herself fall back onto the single couch and looked at her mentor. Her left eye was black, her leg was in a cast, her ribs bandaged. She stood up and walked toward her.

Sitting next to her on the bed, she took the limp hand and, gently, she lifted it to her lips, kissing her fingers. With her other hand, she gently brushed some hair off of Barbara's forehead. She sadly looked at the bruised face. Her left eye was almost completely swollen shut. She swallowed some bile, recalling the twisted wreckage of the unsalvageable Hummer.

"I don't want to lose... Please stay with me…" she said in a low voice. She traced a russet brow with her thumb. "We need you… I need you. You don't have any idea how much I need you."

Her eyes fixed on her red lips. She had dreamed about her for so long. She looked like a sleeping angel, a beautiful sleeping angel.

"I love you." Without thinking, she slowly leaned down and pressed her lips against Barbara. It was a soft touch. She wanted to confess so many things to her and she couldn't. She lightly brushed her mouth against the redhead. "God…" she mumbled, "I'm in love with you."

Suddenly, she was grabbed and pulled back by the collar of her jacket.

"Stupid bitch!" Dick's yell surprised her. She'd been so lost in the moment that she hadn't heard him walk into the room.

He backhanded her forcefully; strong fingers hit her hard. The full impact hit the left side of her face and nose, it made her see stars. She crashed against the wall and, almost knocked out, slipped down to the floor. Her face was burning and her ears buzzed.

"You damn pervert!!" he yelled, lifting her by her lapel. "I don't want to see you near her ever again! Do you hear me?" He lifted her and slammed her into the wall, raising his hand to strike her again.

"Dick, stop!" Dinah shouted, grabbing his wrist. She walked inside the room, following him and she too, had witnessed the brunette's confession. He had surprised the usually alert brunette because she hadn't even tried to defend herself and now, just his hand on her jacket was holding her up; she was totally stunned and limp.

"I'll kick her ass!" Dick shouted.

"I said, let her go!" the teen shouted back.

He released the brunette and the young woman fell heavily to the ground. Dinah immediately kneeled next to her.

"You are an asshole!" the teen shouted, holding Helena's head. She was bleeding from her nose and she took out a tissue to stop the hemorrhaging.

"She was kissing my girlfriend! Didn't you hear her? She is in love with her!!" 

"Shut up! Barbara is resting!"

Helena growled and moved Dinah's hand away from her nose. Shit. She felt like a brick wall had hit her.

"Are you okay?" the blonde asked worriedly, helping her sit up.

"Yeah…" She shook her head.

"Listen to me," Dick growled, pointing at Helena, "I don't want to see you near Barbara again, do you understand me?"

The young crime fighter glared at him. "Go to hell."

"Dick!" Dinah said, whispering. "This is a hospital! Barbara is resting, no fighting here!"

"Stay away from _my _woman," he shouted again at the daughter of his best friend. At that moment, he didn't care. He was really pissed off. He had seen her kissing _his_ girlfriend, confessing her love. Jealously was consuming him.

"You can't tell me what to do," Helena hissed, standing up a few inches from him.

"Okay." He fixed his eyes on hers, his fists clenched, "Let me put it this way, Helena, if you come near my Barbara again, I'll tell her that I saw you kissing her while she was unconscious; I'll tell her that you are in love with her; I'll tell her that's why you hate me." He grinned. "Let's see what she says when she knows you were taking advantage of her situation."

The brunette's face paled. Barbara would kill her; she would ask to go away and never come back. She would never forgive her if she knew she was in love with her.

"It's your choice."

"Fuck you." The brunette narrowed her eyes defiantly.

"No, you are fucked, not me."

"What's going on here?" James Gordon suddenly appeared in the doorway, angry. "I heard your yelling outside! Barbara is recovering!" The old man noticed Dinah was helping Helena stay on her feet. Her face still had the red marks of fingers and her nose was bleeding. He turned and glared at Dick. Annoyed, he grabbed him by his shirt and pushed him outside the room. "Get out of here!"

"Mr. Gordon, she….!"

"Shut up. Get out and wait for me outside!" He closed the door behind him. There was no excuse for hitting a woman.

He walked toward the girls, taking out his handkerchief.

"Are you okay?" He placed the handkerchief under Helena's nose.

"Yes, thanks…" the brunette mumbled.

"What are you doing fighting in here?" James whispered in annoyance. "Barbara is resting."

"I'm sorry…" Helena apologized, ashamed. "I didn't…"

Gordon looked worriedly at his daughter. "How is she?"

"Stable." Dinah brushed her hair back, "Sorry, Mr. Gordon, it wasn't Helena's fault. He surprised her."

"He surprised you?" Now he was really angry. "I'll be right back."

"I'll check Helena's nose," Dinah said.

"I'm okay." The brunette tilted her head back, with the handkerchief below her nose.

"Go with her. No arguing." Gordon opened the door. "It's an order," he said, perfectly aware of Helena's stubbornness.

"You heard the boss." Dinah nodded her head toward the door. "Come on, we need to get your nose checked out."

-------------------------

Dick was pacing outside the room in the corridor, rubbing his chin with his hand.

Helena loved her.

She loved her. That's why she was always arguing with him. Inside, he was insecure about Barbara, and now that he knew Helena loved her, it was like a flashing neon sign.

He was sure that Barbara could never love her back, but…

They were very close. They were close in a way that he never could be because they were bound by pain, loss.

He'd always had been jealous of Helena, she'd been with Barbara in her most difficult times.

He had failed.

And that was difficult to accept.

"Dick!" Gordon appeared in the corridor, furious. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Commissioner, she…" he tried to explain.

"There is no excuse for hitting a woman! And you say you are a man?"

"But sir, she…" 

"No excuse, Dick! You disappoint me!" He didn't let him finish, pointing his finger at him. "A gentleman never strikes a woman!"

"She…"

"Barbara is healing! She needs rest, silence, and you hit her best friend while she is unconscious! It's the first and last time that you touch Helena! Do you hear me?" 

Dick put his hands on his waist and lowered his head, annoyed. He respected this man so much; he was right, whatever the reason, it was not right to hit a woman… and besides, this was Barbara's father.

"Did you hear me, Grayson?" Gordon almost shouted at him.

"Yes, sir…"

"Now go!"

"But Sir."

"Go, I said, I'm very angry right now."

The dark haired man nodded and turned. He couldn't do anything. It was useless to try to explain.

"Dick," Gordon growled, glaring at him.

"Yes, sir?"

"If you ever lay a hand on my Babs, you are a dead man."

-------------------------

A doctor in the same hospital checked Helena's nose. Usually, she would refuse it, but the fact that Dick had discovered her feelings had left her broken and numb.

The only daughter of Selina Kyle had kept her eyes fixed on the floor since she had arrived at the doctor's office. She hadn't said a word. Her nose was okay. The doctor left the room and Dinah appeared with an ice pack.

"Put this on your face or you will have a big bruise tomorrow."

The young woman accepted it without protest.

Dinah crossed her arms and looked at her friend, worried. "He's such an asshole, don't worry."

Helena winced a bit when she put the cold pack on her face. Shit, her face was really stinging.

"Are you really in love with her?" Dinah asked shyly.

The brunette didn't answer, angry with herself, why she had been so stupid and opened her big mouth?

Dinah knew her silence and the silence with Dick was a confirmation of a truth that she couldn't deny. "…When?" she asked gently, crossing her arms.

"I don't know..." Helena said after long seconds of silence, avoiding the blonde's eyes. "Maybe it was after my mom died… but I only realized it a few months ago… Now I understand so many things. I didn't know what I was feeling was love."

"She really doesn't know?"

The brunette shook her head.

Dinah sat next to her and touched her hand. Helena never let anyone touch her hand, but this time she was so lost. She accepted the support.

"Tell her…"

"She'll hate me."

"She could never hate you."

"She will… I don't want her to know. I can't disappoint her anymore."

"You won't disappoint her. She deserves to know, she'll understand."

"No! She'll feel uncomfortable if she knows…. It's best this way." She stood up to pick up her coat.

"What are you going to do?"

"I can't let him tell her."

"He's blackmailing you!" Dinah took her arm, causing the brunette to turn and face her. "You can't do what he says! You and Barbara are friends, you two have been together too long!"

"Dinah, don't you understand? I screwed up!!" She waved her hands "I'm in love with her! When she finds out, it'll break her heart! I don't want that…"

"She'll understand."

"Dinah… She is happy with him. She loves him! She wants me to accept him and I can't!" Blue eyes teared up. "I can't be next to her, waking up every day seeing her love him. She would never be completely happy knowing that each time she touches his hand, it hurts me."

The brunette lowered her head and sighed.

"You can't go," the teen mumbled.

"I can't put her against the wall. She would suffer so much if she knew that her happiness is my unhappiness. She has suffered so much and I don't have the right to ruin her life. I owe it to her."

Dinah didn't know what to say. A tear fell from her eye.

"I'm sorry, kid." Helena took her hand and squeezed it gently. "I'm going to my place, I need a shower."

"Helena…"

"Yeah?"

"You forgot this." She raised the ice pack and threw it at her. She knew she couldn't help so much now, but she wanted to let Helena know that she supported her.

Helena caught it and lowered her head. "Dinah?"

"Yes."

"Please don't tell her."

The teen nodded sadly.

Helena put the ice pack on her face and closed the door behind her.

Dinah understood Helena's distress. Picking up her backpack, she returned to Barbara's room.


	11. Chapter 11

"Can you help me?" Barbara asked softly. "I need another pillow behind my back."

Her face was swollen and bruised and her body hurt like hell. After three long days of unconsciousness, she finally opened her eyes. She hated hospitals --- the smells and sounds of machines, the cold rooms; but her condition wasn't good and she was going to have to stay there a week. The trauma to her head had been rather serious and the doctors wanted to keep her under observation.

Dick helped her and kissed her temple. "Better?"

"Yes, thanks."

Dinah sat on a small couch, reading a book. She lifted her head. "Feeling better?"

"Yes, thanks…" The redhead smiled slightly. "How is your arm?"

"Better, I'm collecting signatures on it. I have thirty five."

"The doctor says you can go home on Monday," Dick said, holding the redhead's hand.

"Thank God! I hate this place."

He laughed. "Want anything else?"

"Where's Helena?"

"Maybe working," he sat on the bed next to her, "I told you she was here the entire time you were unconscious; I think she's trying to make up the time she lost at work."

Barbara had the nagging sensation that something was wrong since yesterday, when she'd returned to consciousness. Knowing Helena, she'd never move from her side until she'd seen her awake. She studied the teen, who lowered her head. Well, now she was certain something was wrong.

"The truth, Dick. Where is she?"

The tall man sighed and turned to the teen. "Could you excuse us a moment, Dinah?"

The teen, in a rotten mood, nodded and walked out of the room.

Barbara fixed her eyes on him. She could tell she wasn't going like what he was had to say. "Well?"

"We fought…" Dick said.

"Why?"

"She doesn't like us together." He took her hand in his.

The redhead frowned. Helena what?

"She is violent towards me because of that. She told me." He shook his head.

"What did she say?"

"She told me she doesn't like me. She is never going to accept us and I'm not going to leave you. I love you. I told her and she was pissed off. We fought… and she left."

Barbara took a deep breath. Great. She was out for three days and everything was a mess.

"I love you, Barbara." Dick looked at her. "And I'll fight everything and everyone for you."

"I need to talk to her." The redhead lowered her eyes to the blankets.

"Barbara, she is selfish, she'd rather see you alone than happy. She knows I'm here, she doesn't want to see me. She's not going to come here."

"I said I'm going to talk with her." Her voice was firm.

"All right, if you want. But it'll be useless."

-------------------------

The redhead woke at midnight. Her room was dark. Her ribs were bothering her. Thankfully, she couldn't feel any pain from her broken leg. She stared at the ceiling. Dick was driving her crazy with all his attention. He didn't seem to want to leave her alone for a moment. Luckily, no one could stay overnight in the hospital and it gave her the time she needed to be alone and think.

"Why don't you come and sit? The couch is comfortable," she said suddenly, in a weak voice.

A soft sigh was heard.

Helena.

She was there.

"I've been asking for you." Barbara looked at a far corner of the room.

"Working. Leonard was pissed at me," the young woman said softly, leaving her hideout. How did she know when she was near? She always did that.

"Yes, and I can walk and I'll kick your ass as soon as my leg heals." The redhead pressed a button and a small lamp turned on.

Helena smiled lightly and stood next her bed. "You don't need to stand up to kick my ass. You always do it. How do you feel?"

"Like shit?" the older woman joked.

"I figured." The brunette's fingers played with the blanket. She was happy to see her awake; she'd thought that maybe a night visit, while she was sleeping, would be good, but she never expected the redhead to wake. "I'm glad that you're okay. You scared me."

"Was a bad accident, huh?" Barbara asked.

"Yeah, pretty bad." Deep blue eyes met green. "You scared me."

"I know you didn't move from my side, thank you." 

The brunette shrugged her shoulders.

"Why did you leave? Why didn't you come back?"

"Sorry… I was… busy…"

"Don't lie to me, Helena, I know you." Barbara took slim fingers between her own. "Dick told me you two fought…"

"It was just a stupid fight."

"I don't think so. You came back hiding in the shadows. You didn't want me to know you were here, right? You've been avoiding me. What happened?"

"Can we talk about this tomorrow?"

"No." Barbara's voice was firm. "I want to know."

The brunette stood up and brushed her hair back. She needed to find a way to avoid this.

"You don't like him," the redhead pushed her.

"It's not that…" Helena responded quietly, looking everywhere but at Barbara.

"So, why the argument? What did he say that kept you away from me?"

Helena didn't know how to answer, she was cornered. And she hated feeling cornered.

"Is it true that you don't want me to be with him?" Barbara asking insistently, she wanted the younger woman to open up to her. "Do you want him to leave?"

"Who told you that?" the brunette turned in annoyance, glaring at her.

"Dick." The redhead remained cold.

"It's not true! I want you to be happy. You deserve a good man like him."

"Bullshit. Why were you two fighting?"

"Because he doesn't like me, I hurt his ego!" The brunette waved her arms. "He and I have conflicting ideas, conflicting personalities. He can't control me and it pisses him off! But I don't want you to leave him. I never said that!"

"Why did you leave?"

"Because I needed to be alone. I needed time to think!"

"Thinking about what?"

Helena lowered her head, hands in her pockets. This was going to be hard.

The redhead waited in silence.

"You and Dick need to be alone; you are always surrounded by people, Alfred, Dinah, me." She began to pace. "We are always there and I need my own space, to be independent. I need a change… I…. I need it…"

Barbara frowned. Where was she going?

Helena ran her fingers through her shaggy hair and stared at the picture on the wall. A copy of _The starry Night_ by Van Gogh. Her mother told her that Van Gogh had painted it furiously; the paint vibrated with rockets of burning yellow, while planets gyrated like cartwheels. She never liked that picture, it was like chaos at midnight. But, at that moment, it fit perfectly with her soul.

"You rescued me so many times, Barbara," the brunette continued with a whisper, finally looking at her, "in many ways. I'm very grateful. I owe you my life."

"Helena…"

"It's true. But I think it's time…"

"Time?" The redhead blinked. She didn't understand what was happening.

"To move on." Helena finished quietly. She knew this was the only way to convince her mentor that her words were true. "You trained me very well. It's time to work on my own." 

"What are you talking about?"

Helena needed all her courage to keep going. She couldn't hurt her. She couldn't take her happiness. "I'm moving." 

"I don't want you to move," the cyber genius said incredulously. This was insane.

"But I want to," Helena interrupted her.

"It's absurd!"

"I want try things on my own. You always worked alone."

The older woman massaged her temples. She felt a headache coming. "Where did you get that ridiculous idea?"

"I've always been under your wing. I need to fly alone."

"What?" What in the hell was Helena thinking? Had she completely lost her mind?

The brunette stood up next to her. She kneeled next to the bed and held her hand, giving it a long, soft kiss. "I love you, Barbara."

The redhead shivered at the contact of the young woman's lips.

"But I need my own life as you need yours," Helena whispered, her eyes on the older woman, lovingly. "I'll still come see you and Dinah and Alfred…. But now is the perfect time to try to do something on my own… Please."

Barbara looked her speechlessly, she felt her heart shatter. She never expected it. In fact, it never even occurred to her that Helena would ever leave.

"It's Dick? Is that why?" she finally managed to ask.

Helena laughed lightly, trying to hide the tears in her eyes. Barbara's pained expression broke her heart. "No, it's me." She tried to joke. "I'm a wild cat, remember?"

"I don't like this idea." Her former mentor lowered her head.

The click of the door opening made the redhead turn her head. The door opened, a nurse walked inside with a tray. She turned again to the place where Helena was, but she was gone. She looked around the room. She'd left through the open window.

"Hello, Miss Gordon. Problems sleeping?" the nurse asked.

"A bit."

"I brought your pills." The nurse put the tray next to her and gave her a glass of water and two pills. "Oh, we need to close that window, it's a cold night."

"No… it's okay."

"Sorry, hospital policy, for your own safety," the old woman said, walking toward the window.

Barbara stared at her pills, still stunned by Helena's confession. She couldn't believe what had just transpired.

"Miss Gordon."

The redhead hated being treated like a child. She swallowed the pills.

"Excellent." The nurse took the glass of water and turned off the light. "Now try to rest."

"Okay."

The door closed. Barbara looked through the window in silence. Something was wrong, she didn't believe her. Helena was stubborn and cranky, but she knew she would never abandon them. She was going to have to find out what was really going on. After a few minutes, she began to feel her eyes closing. The pills were working. She looked again toward the window, she knew she was somewhere outside. She knew Helena.

Tired and drained, she let sleep overwhelm her and closed her eyes. "Good night, Helena," she mumbled before falling into a sound sleep.

Deep in the shadows, a dark figure stood on an emergency stairway maintaining her vigil on the small room. "Good night, Barbara."

_**How does it feel.**_

**_I'm not afraid of anything  
I just need to know that I can breathe  
I don't need much of anything  
But suddenly, suddenly  
I am small and the world is big  
All around me is fast moving   
Surrounded by so many things  
But suddenly, suddenly_**

Chorus:   
How does it feel to be  
Different from me  
Are we the same How does it feel to be  
Different from me _  
Are we the same  
How does it feel_

I am young and I am free  
But I get tired and I get weak  
I get lost and I can't sleep  
But suddenly, suddenly

Chorus

Would you comfort me?   
Would you cry with me?

Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah  
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah

I am small and the world is big  
But I'm not afraid of anything

Chorus

How does it feel, how does it feel…

-------------------------


	12. Chapter 12

Barbara wasn't in a good mood the next day. She wanted to talk with Dinah or Alfred, but Dick didn't give them an opportunity to be alone. He was overwhelming her and it was pissing her off. It was as if he didn't want her to talk to Dinah and it seemed as though the teen was avoiding being alone with her too.

"Dinah, can you hand me the phone?" she asked, in the middle of a boring movie they were watching.

"What do you need?" Dick asked hurriedly.

"I'm going to call Helena."

He couldn't hide his disappointment. "Barbara…"

"I'm going to call her, I want to see her," the redhead said firmly. "Dinah?"

The teen gave her mobile phone to her guardian. The older woman dialed Helena's apartment. The brunette hated cell phones, so her only option was calling the Dark. The click of the answering machine disappointed her. "Helena, I want to see you, please come to the Tower." She pressed the off button and dialed another phone number.

Dick glared at her. Dinah scratched her head, pretending to watch the movie.

"Leonard? Hi, it's Barbara Gordon… yes, I'm much better now, thanks… I'll can go home in three days…. Thank you very much… Is Helena there? I need to talk to her…. No? Oh… Can you please tell her to call me?... yes, thanks… bye…" she gave the cell phone back to Dinah.

"Thanks…"

"Sure."

"Try to find her, I need to see her."

Dick sighed, "Barbara, I don't think…"

"Dick…" she cut him off, "Stay out of this."

"I can't!" He stood up. "She is trying to keep you away from me!"

"Dick, I'm old enough to make my own decisions. I do not need help."

"That's not the point…"

The redhead took a deep breath. He was definitely testing her limits, and that was not good. "What is the point, then?"

He pinched the bridge of his nose. Barbara observed him in silence. Suddenly, he kneeled next to her and took her hand.

"Will you marry me?"

-------------------------

A loud night at Dark House Bar. The place was filled with customers. Helena had asked Leonard is she could have double shifts for the next two weeks. It would keep her distracted. She gave two beers to a man, another one put an empty pitcher on the counter. She wore a black outfit that was practically glued to her skin.

"Hey, baby. How about a refill?" the drunk man asked.

"Call me "baby" one more time and you will regret it." She turned around and put her hands on the counter.

"Why?"

"Because she's my girlfriend and she likes be the man." Dinah appeared suddenly, sitting on a chair next to the man, smiling.

"Huh??"

"Maybe you should ask him if he wants to be the woman." Helena grinned.

"Hey, I'm just trying to get a refill."

The brunette reached behind the counter and put a fresh pitcher on the counter. "Now you have it. Scram."

The man hurriedly walked back to his table. Both women laughed.

"That was good," Helena said. "Want a coke?"

"A coke?" Dinah frowned.

"You're underage and still healing."

"My arm is okay… Maybe a drink of something?"

"No way." Helena opened a coke can and gave it to her. "And, besides, my shift is over." The brunette poured a shot of tequila for herself. "Bart, see you later."

"Bye, Helena."

"What are you doing here?" Helena took her glass and walked toward an empty table in the corner.

"She's been looking for you all day." Dinah followed her. 

"Yeah, I heard all the messages."

"You need to talk to her." Dinah sat down. 

"I already did….yesterday." The brunette took a seat next to her.

"You were at the hospital yesterday? I didn't see you."

"At night…"

"What happened? Did you tell her?"

"No," she took a sip of her drink, "I told her I need my own space and need to be independent… That I want work alone."

"That's a lie." The blonde tried to understand.

"Much better than the truth," the young woman sighed. "I told her I'm moving and that I want to work alone."

"This is stupid! He's blackmailing you! It's not fair!"

"Life sometimes isn't. And life has been more than unfair to her."

"She deserves to know the truth." The teen wanted to smash the brunette's head against the wall, but it wasn't the wall's fault that Helena has a hard head..

Helena crossed her arms on the table, "Tell me something. How would it help her to know the truth?"

"If you leave, you'll break her heart, she loves you so much."

"How do you think she'd feel if she found out that the kid, that she promised her best friend to take care of, is in love with her?" Helena clenched her teeth, angry with herself. "Don't you understand? I screwed up her good job, all her good intentions."

"He asked her to marry him," Dinah blurted out, cutting her off.

The brunette's face paled. The room was suddenly swimming and her mouth was dry.

"He did it." The teen reiterated.

Helena downed a tequila shot. She needed a bottle. "I'm happy for her."

"What?" Dinah blinked in confusion.

"Good for her." Helena felt a knot in her throat. She cleared it, staring at the empty glass between in her hand. "Did she accept?"

"She said that she needed to think about it. It wasn't a good time for her. So he told her everything was your fault." Dinah looked at her. "And I told him that wasn't true, that it was his fault too because he is impulsive and selfish. He is an asshole! He tries to control her life… first it's you and then he will try to get rid of me and Alfred! He is insecure and jealous. We started arguing, then Barbara asked me to leave." She shrugged her shoulders. "And… I'm here."

"She kicked you out?" Helena smirked.

"Yeah, she was angry with Dick, she told him her decisions were hers to make and that she was tired of him just blaming you." Dinah took a sip of her coke.

"And?"

"And that was when she asked me to leave because they needed to talk alone. Talk to her, she's asking for you. I told you, she's been looking for you all day."

"Dinah," the brunette fixed her eyes on her. "This is not about what you and I want. It's about what she wants."

"She is going to keep asking for you. You can't hide forever."

"Tell her I need time alone to think."

"Think about what?"

Helena sighed "I just need to think, ok? Give me a few days."

"Okay, but just a few days."

The brunette smiled and hit her arm playfully.

-------------------------

Barbara looked into the night, sitting on the balcony of her room. Finally, she'd been moved out the hospital. Her leg was in a cast, resting on a small bench. She had told Dinah she was going to be there a few minutes, she was tired of being closed in.

Dick asked her the question she had hoped to hear when she was young. She always thought the day she heard it she would become crazy with happiness, but things were completely different. She was more worried than happy. Maybe it was because of the tension between Helena and Dick.

The night was cold, but not as much as her soul. Helena was still missing. She hadn't seen talked to her in days.

Dinah told her that she'd seen her at the Dark Horse. Dinah disagreed with her partner's intention to leave the team and the brunette had asked for time to be alone, to think. But she was sure Helena was close, she was sure Helena had been keeping an eye on her at night during her stay at the hospital; a silent and constant vigil hidden in an unseen place.

She looked to the stars. She loved New Gotham nights.

"A penny for your thoughts," a voice said behind her.

"Dad!" She turned and smiled, finding her father standing a few meters away.

"Hi, honey," the older man leaned down and kissed her cheek, covering her shoulders with a sweater. "It's cold out here."

"I needed fresh air."

"How do you feel?" He examined the bruise on her face. It was nasty, but she looked much better than last week.

"I can't feel my legs," the redhead joked. "Weird."

Jim laughed. He loved her sense of humor. He kissed her forehead. "I'm glad you're okay."

"Thanks."

He looked down at the city covered in lights. "Hey, nice view."

"Yeah, Helena loves to be out here at night." She smiled lightly.

"Where is she? I haven't seen her. It's strange."

Barbara sighed. "She said she needs time to think."

"Think? Think about what?"

James Gordon knew about his daughter's night activities, she had confessed it to him years before. He'd discovered that she was Batgirl, so she knew he would also discover that she was the Oracle, and she thought it a much better idea to tell to him first. Of course, it had also involved a discussion about Helena and her meta-abilities, as well as her work as a super-hero.

He had understood.

But he still thought being a crime fighter was a risky profession, even for Helena.

"Dick thinks we can try again… "

"You and Dick again?"

The redhead nodded. "He's jealous of Helena and Helena is jealous of him… It's not easy. He asked me to marry him."

Gordon raised his brow. "Wow!!" He reached down to hug her. "Congratulations. I'm so happy for you." He sensed something was wrong. Moving back a bit, he tried to find her eyes, but she avoided it. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"I'm not sure..."

"You're not sure? You two have been flirting for as long as I can remember:"

"Yes, I know but…" Why was this so hard? She always thought it would be easy. She felt a knot in her throat.

"He's a nice man. He knows you, he loves you. What more can you ask for?" He cupped her cheek with his hand.

She finally meet his eyes. "Helena. They fight so much, I don't want her to feel pushed out of my life. She is my family too, I can't choose between them."

"They need to understand that." He smiled. "Talk to them; I'm sure that if they love you they'll do it."

"Yes… I've heard that, but it's not that easy."

"Happiness is in your hands. You must choose. It's not easy? I'm sure it's not. But things are never easy."

"Tell me about it." She smiled lightly.

He kissed her cheek. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He was a wonderful man; she was so lucky to have him as a father.

"Good evening," a voice interrupted.

The old man looked up. Dick Grayson was standing at the balcony doors with a red rose in his hand.

"Good evening, Dick." James Gordon said standing up.

"Hi…" Barbara smiled at him. He looked really good dressed in black.

"Hi, love." He leaned in and kissed her softly on her lips.

"How are you?" Gordon asked, sitting back on the balcony.

"I'm glad to see you here, sir," the dark haired man said. He looked at Barbara a second and rubbed his palms nervously to turn to see him. "I've been dating Barbara for few months. We are having a great time and… I love her."

"I'm happy for you two," Gordon said.

3

Dick took Barbara's hand. " I want to ask for your daughter's hand. It would honor me so much."

The redhead looked at him, speechless. The question surprised the Commissioner, too.

"Ohh…" he mumbled, looking at his daughter, trying figure out what to do.

Barbara pulled him down gently. "Dick…"

Then the tall man immediately kneeled in front of her and kissed her fingers. "Please marry me."


	13. Chapter 13

"Yes."

"Yes? You said yes?"

"What was I supposed to do?" Barbara sighed, taking a sip of her coffee. "My father was there, he was being so nice… and…"

Dinah sat next to her, fixing her eyes on her and crossing her arms. Alfred gave Dinah a glass of milk and looked at the redhead raising his brow.

"What?" Barbara waved her hands. "Why does no one say 'Congratulations, Barbara' or something like that?"

"Maybe because I don't see you jumping up and down with happiness.?" Dinah poured some cereal in her bowl.

Barbara pointed to her left leg. "Broken leg."

Dinah rolled her eyes. "You know what I mean."

"Look, he is a nice guy, handsome, fun, he loves me and I love him! I think that I'm just afraid to take the next step." Shifting uncomfortably, she wet her suddenly dry lips.

"Interesting theory." Alfred opened his cook book.

"I have lived so many years alone. It's natural that I feel… well, afraid to live with someone."

"Yeah, Helena was a piece of cake." The teen poured the milk on her cereal.

"You know that's different." Barbara glared at her.

"They're both arrogant, they wear cool cloths, they vanish, they have strong personalities, they're impatient, they love sweeps, they're heroes, they dress in black, both of them are like big kids and neither of them follow your instructions. I don't know why it's so complicated for you to make a decision. Helena is just like him and you've lived with her for years."

"She does have a point," Alfred said.

"The 'difference' is big." Barbara pointed to her crotch.

Alfred chuckled.

"Look, I don't like him so much." Dinah took a spoonful of cereal "He is nice, fun, but I don't like him so much as your 'husband.' I don't know why, maybe because he tries to control your life. But this isn't about what Helena or I want. It's about what you want."

Barbara raised her brow and looked at the blonde.

"Okay, that last bit was Helena." Dinah put the spoon in her mouth.

"Helena told you that?" The redhead frowned.

The blonde head bobbed. She swallowed her cereal. "She said that she respects what you choose and she supports you."

"When did she tell you that?"

"The day she told me she needed time to think."

"She is ducking my calls. This is something I need to solve immediately. I just need to be firm with Helena and Dick. They need to respect each other and understand that I'm not anyone's property. I can think on my own. And… I need to tell her I'm going to marry him and she will understand."

The soft ding of the elevator make all three heads turn. A familiar lithe woman appeared.

"Hi folks." The brunette's hair jutted out of her head in shaggy clumps that, somehow, Helena made look stylish.

Alfred put the book on the table. "This is going to be interesting."

Barbara felt her heart jump. She couldn't hide a big smile. "Helena!"

The brunette looked at her, feeling a great happiness. She had missed her like hell. Her face was still bruised and her leg was still in a cast. She leaned and bussed the redhead's cheek. Closing her eyes, she smelled her shampoo. She moved back and smiled.

"You look much better." Blue eyes met green.

"I'm glad to see you." The redhead touched her arm and squeezed it gently.

The touch sent a shiver through her spine. She turned and removed her coat. "Hi Alfred, hi kid."

"I'm not a kid." The teen grumbled.

Barbara followed her protégée's movements. Helena moved with such grace. She had missed her… so very much.

"Good morning, Miss Helena. Would you like something for breakfast?"

"Please!" The brunette sat down at the table.

"You arrived just in time," Alfred said.

Dinah stared at Helena's face, worried. This was not going to be easy for her.

"Yeah? Why?" the brunette asked.

"Barbara was telling us the good news," Alfred explained, giving Helena some waffles.

"Yeah? What? Did you buy a new computer?" the young woman laughed.

Barbara smiled shyly. "No."

"So?"

"I'm getting married."

Eyes clouded with confusion and lips pursed as if just waiting for the right words. "Oh."

Ouch.

She was officially mortally wounded.

"Master Dick proposed to her last night," Alfred elaborated.

Suddenly, the brunette's appetite was gone. She stared at her plate in silence. Every touch Dick and Barbara exchanged was like a nail in her flesh.

"You don't have anything to say?" Barbara moved forward curiously, trying to get a glimpse of Helena's face - trying to gauge her emotions.

"It's… You surprised me… I'm happy for you." Helena took the honey and poured it on her waffles, hoping that they didn't notice her confusion. "He's a good guy. He'll make you happy."

There was a definite note of disbelief in her tone, Barbara analyzed. "Helena, what's going on?"

"Nothing, why?" She put a piece of waffle in her mouth.

Alfred must have lost his touch. The waffle had turned stiff and was next to impossible to swallow. What would he be without her? What was she without her? She just wanted go out, run and scream. Hide. But was broad daylight and nowhere to hide. There was nowhere to hide, even in the dark of the night when you were trying to hide from yourself.

Dinah bit her lip, knowing the brunette's feelings. She was upset for her. This would be terribly hard for her friend.

Barbara watched her. She was pretending to be busy with her breakfast, but she knew she was hiding something. Her last comment caused her more pain and she just didn't know why. Helena needed to understand that she could have a life and, at the same time, they could be friends.

After Wade's death, Helena had avoided her. It had hurt. The redhead had felt that she had lost her then. Every time she reached out, the younger woman would dart off, hiding from her – leaving her behind. Now she was hurt, fighting her own pain – again pushing her away. But this time she wouldn't let it happen.

"You and I need to talk," Barbara finally said to the brunette, looking pointedly at the elderly butler and her other protégée.

"I'm finished," Dinah said, standing up.

"I just remembered that I need to polish the silver." The butler smiled gently, "I'll be right back."

Helena glared at them both.

"What is this?" She sighed and took another bite of her waffle. This was going to be a lecture and she wasn't in the mood.

Barbara knew Helena never liked her friendship with Wade and now with Dick. She'd had her alone for such a long time before they came into her life and suddenly she had to share with someone else. She knew it wasn't easy for her. She tried to be gentle.

"Why didn't you come back to the hospital?" she asked with a soft voice, her eyes searching for Helena's.

"I told you, I needed time to think."

The red head tilted her head. She needed to try again. "Why haven't you called me? Why have you been ducking my calls?" The brunette was going to open her mouth, but Barbara raised her index finger "Don't give me the 'I needed to think' crap again."

"Because it was a hard decision. You and Dick need your own space, even more now that you are getting married. I want my own space. I want to work by myself."

"Why are you pushing me away?"

"I'm not pushing you away." The tension in the brunette's slender shoulders was evident.

"I know you. What is going on?"

She hated feeling cornered. She hated it. It made her turn violent. She took a deep breath and turned her head. Before Dinah came, there was only Barbara and her. Only the two of them. She liked the kid, it had been difficult at the beginning, but now, she'd grown to care for her like a sister. But with Barbara, there was something else, something she couldn't explain. Not until they weren't alone anymore. First Wade, now Dick.

Dick fucking Grayson had discovered that she loved Barbara. It threw her world out of balance.

And now, knowing that they were going to get married simply… broke her soul, her everything.

How could she explain that to the person that saved her life? That took care of her since she was a kid? How could she explain that she'd failed her? Barbara would think she had failed if she knew that with all her attention, care and help, that Helena had fallen in love with her.

"Helena?" Barbara's voice took pulled her from her thoughts.

"I told you," she said again "I want to work alone. I'm ready to do it."

"I don't believe you."

"I'm a wild cat, Barbara. You know that." The brunette lifted her eyes, fixing them on the older woman with a predatory look. "You know wild cats can never be tamed. You knew some day I would fly by myself. You always knew it. I'm flying now. It's the perfect time, you have someone with you who loves you and can take care of you. You are not going to be alone. You don't need me anymore."

Barbara held her gaze, feeling a knot in her throat. "Who told you I don't need you anymore?"

"I…I just know it." Helena cursed herself for her words when she meet green eyes and saw the reaction. She paled slightly and was speechless. She'd hurt her, but it was much better than the truth. "Barbara… we've been together for so long, we've learned a lot from each other. I've learn a lot from you. I really appreciate it, but… it's time to choose our own road."

"What are you talking about?" Barbara's heart skipped a beat, not only due to her words, but also to the look in her eyes. She was talking seriously, she couldn't detect the slightest hesitation in her face or words.

The brunette stood up and walked toward her. She kneeled by her chair and took her hand. She held her gaze, marveling at the feel of her fingers around her hand, at the tenderness in her eyes.

"I love you." Helena whispered, lost in green eyes. Drowning. "This doesn't mean I'm not going to see you anymore. But you need to have your life with Dick and I need to have my life too…" She extended her hand.

Barbara blinked trying to understand. She was giving back her earrings and her necklace.

"I have to fly," the brunette said, taking the redhead's hand and placing her comms in it.

"No." The redhead moved her hand back, feeling a knot in her throat. Her protégée wasn't joking. She never could have imagined it would hurt as it was hurting her now. But she was right, she couldn't keep her at her side forever. She was young, wild, she had a whole life outside the ClockTower.

"Please." 

"Keep it… as a gift."

Helena bit her lip. Fuck. This was so damn difficult and Barbara wasn't helping with that look in her eyes. She began to hate herself.

"We will always be a family, right?" she finally whispered.

"Always." Barbara cupped her cheek with her palm. Her eyes started watering.

The young woman leaned into the caress, enjoying the warm fingers against her skin. Heavenly. She wanted time to stop forever. But she couldn't. She stood up and leaned to kiss her secret love's cheek. She lingered by her side, maybe longer than necessary, with her mouth to her skin. Barbara held her breath.

The dark head ducked and moved back. "Thanks…"

"You're leaving?" the redhead asked, disappointed.

"Yeah… we have inventory at the bar today. I promised Leonard I'd help him," Helena said, stepping back toward the elevator. "See you."

Barbara nodded, following her with her gaze.

When the doors closed, she felt her heart break.

Tears fell from her eyes.

There was a gaping hole in her soul.

-------------------------

Dinah, with her arms crossed over the rail in the upper level of the ClockTower, watched her mentor work. She had been immersed in work the last two weeks. Dinah asked her to rest, but Barbara didn't hear her or… Dick. He waited for her until after midnight and she always finished too exhausted to talk.

In the mornings, she woke very early to go to school where she stayed late, just to come back and work at the Delphi again. She didn't talk very much. Dinah knew she was sad.

The redhead worked at her computer. Suddenly aware of things being out of place, she stopped her work and looked behind her. Whenever Helena was near, the energy was different. The ClockTower brightened with her presence… Now it all seemed so dark, lonely… cold.

She missed her partner, the moments when seated at the computer, she could feel the younger woman's presence, knowing she was close, watching her work, and Barbara would pretend not to know she was there. Sometimes over the past few weeks, she could say Helena was near, she could feel it in her skin, but it was absurd.

Dick was being nice. Attentive. But she still felt empty.

She returned her focus to her work.

Work or a search?

Recent news spoke of some burglars found tied up in the street, a bank robbery stopped by an unknown person. All the facts and details fit perfectly with Huntress' style. She had been following her activities through those reports and, in a way it, it made her feel better, at least she knew where Helena was. And that she was okay.

-------------------------

Helena couldn't tear herself from the sight of the redhead's smile, her long fingers, elegant hands; how could she forget the movement of her red hair under the sun's last breaths in the evening. She closed her eyes, she could almost smell her soft perfume and her shampoo, the smell of home. The sound of her laughter echoed in her ears.

Helena opened her eyes. She knew she shouldn't watch the older woman like this, but she couldn't avoid crouching outside the ClockTower at night and just watching her.

It hurt, watching from a distance. Even more when he was near, when he touched her or kissed her.

Suddenly, he appeared. He was smiling and she hadn't seen him. She couldn't deny the man was good looking. Barbara was lost in her work. He touched her shoulder and Barbara jumped. He laughed and she smiled at him.

She wished the redhead would look at her the way she looked at him.

Dick gave her a flower hidden behind his back. By her expression and smile, she liked it. He leaned down and kissed her. She wrapped her arms around his neck.

Her eyes morphed. Jealousy were driving her mad with rage and frustration. She growled and ran like a wild animal through the night, trying to escape her feelings, her pain.

She ran and jumped between buildings and alleys. Finally, Gotham Bay stopped her. No more road, no more buildings. She couldn't keep running.

She screamed. It was more a howl.

The howl of a wounded animal.

The tears won this time.

She surrendered to the pain and crouched down, head in her hands, sobbing.


	14. Chapter 14

She hit the door harder. She had been banging on it for the last five minutes, but she was sure she was inside. After a few more seconds, she hit the heavy door again.

"I'm coming! I'm coming!" she finally heard sleepy voice call from inside.

The door opened and Helena appeared, wearing a long shirt as pajamas. Her hair was all over her face and her eyes were half closed from the bright light of the day.

"What's the matter with you?" the brunette growled, annoyed. She blinked in surprise when she recognized her visitor. "Dinah? What the hell are you doing here?"

"Rough night?" 

"No. Not a rough night." Helena turned and walked back inside her apartment "I worked until five and at the end I had to handle some drunk people."

"Your specialty." The blonde closed the door behind her and followed her friend.

"Not when you are drunk too. What time is it?" The young crime fighter let herself fall on the coach.

"Eleven. I was out of school early and I wanted to visit you."

"Eleven in the morning? You're insane!" Helena curled up, covering her face with a pillow.

To Dinah's surprise, the apartment was clean and in order. Very different from its usual 'look.' "If you weren't here, I'd say I was in the wrong place."

"Grmmmfff."

"Well, whatever. I brought breakfast." She lifted a bag and walked toward the dining room. "Muffins, croissants and donuts."

A dark head lifted, appearing over the back of the couch. "Chocolate donuts?"

"Yep." Dinah sat down and took out a carton of milk and some donuts. "Hot donuts from Dunkin Donuts."

With a fast, agile jump, Helena was at the table.

"The croissant is mine," the blonde said.

After breakfast, they moved back to the living room. Dinah noticed that the answering machine was flashing. "You have a message. Who's it from?"

"I don't know." Helena pressed the 'start' button.

Beep… Helena, this is Josie. I've been looking for you, please call me….Beep… 

"A new friend that I met," Helena explained.

"Oh…"

Beep… We want to give you a free credit card, just call 555-6789 City Bank… Beep 

"I think they dialed the wrong number," Dinah giggled.

"Yeah, right."

Beep… Helena, this is Josie. I need to talk to you, please call me… Beep 

"Your friend again," the blonde noted

The brunette sighed. "Yeah."

Beep… What's wrong, Helena? I really enjoyed that wonderful night. Didn't you? Please call me… Beep. 

Dinah's brows raised. Helena reached to turned off the machine.

"Enough," she said.

Her movement stopped when she heard the next message.

Beep… Hel? This is Barbara… I just want to know how you're doing… -silence- I' appreciate it if you'd call me or… if you want come to dinner, you're welcome, you're always welcome, you don't need to announce that you're coming. –there was a pause and a soft sigh- See you…. Beep 

Helena pressed the off button and remained still, staring at the machine.

"She misses you." Dinah explained, her legs over the side of the couch. "You can't abandon us just because of him."

"I have to let her go. Isn't that what love is all about?" the brunette asked in a whisper. "If you love someone, you want what's best for them. Dick is someone who can love both Oracle and Batgirl in one. She'll be happy with him. I want her to be happy."

"Everything is okay, but I can't accept you leaving our team because he is threatening you. You can't let him blackmail you!! Huntress never would accept that. What's wrong with you?" 

"Dinah, we've discussed this before. I'm not going to hurt her anymore." The brunette turned and sat on the couch again.

"You're doing it now!"

Shit. The kid always knew how to hit her sore spot.

Helena let her head fall on the back of the couch. "I'll hurt her more if she knows. Could we move on, please?"

"Barbara isn't stupid. When she finds out the truth, she is going to be really pissed at him and at you," Dinah pointed out.

"Don't worry, she'll never know." Dark lashes lowered toward the floor.

"Why did you want to come here?" Dick asked curiously. "I didn't know you liked this kind of bar."

"It's not a bar," the redhead said. "It's the opening of the most exclusive late night club lounge in New Gotham."

"Whatever. You don't like these places."

"Dinah convinced me."

"The Wayne Foundation has its advantages." Dinah winked, walking inside. "They sent the tickets. It would be a shame to miss it and, besides, she needs to relax a bit, she works all day."

"Agreed," Dick said.

Barbara had accepted more because the teen had insisted and, in some way, it was good for her. She needed to distract herself a bit.

Once inside, they were in a cathedral-like temple set under high vaulted ceilings with skylights, worth seeing just on its own. Bare-brick walls and rosewood floors were lined with classy light-brown colored booths, colorful cocktails were Haitian inspired. The dance floor was on the lower floor, backed by high windows, where the city lights could be seen.

They were ushered toward the V.I.P. section on the upper floor and could see the people dancing below. A handsome guy invited Dinah to dance and the teen accepted with enthusiasm. The music was nice and the place excellent; she was having a great time.

Barbara took a sip of her non-alcoholic beer. On the dance floor, bodies were dancing in the artificial smoke. Green eyes were mesmerized by a familiar silhouette moving with the music.

Helena.

She looked incredibly sexy, wearing a black outfit. Her dance partner was a stunning woman, really beautiful… who really, in Barbara's opinion, needed to cover her body with some clothes, she was almost nude. The skirt was the shortest thing she ever had seen and her blouse was… well, there were no words to describe it, but it appeared to be just two small pieces of cloth barely covering the essential.

So Helena really liked women? They had joked and talked about it, but she'd never actually seen it. The woman was deliberately moving into the brunette's personal space. Suddenly, Helena closed the distance and kissed her.

Barbara didn't like that one bit.

That was a fact.

She took Dick's glass of scotch and swallowed it in one gulp.

"Hey, what's that for?" he asked, surprised.

"I'll be right back." The redhead excused herself and wheeled through the room full of people.

Helena was enjoying the night. She'd been avoiding Josie the last few days, she didn't want a long relationship right now. But the woman had been looking for her insistently and finally she had invited her to the opening and it definitely had been an excellent decision. The place was cool and the music excellent.

Until…

Barbara was there, with Dick.

Her heart sunk. What was she doing there?

Whatever, it was the perfect moment.

The tall blonde closed the distance between them. Helena smirked, their faces inches apart; then she leaned in and kissed Josie softly. After a few seconds, she moved back and looked upstairs.

Barbara was gone.

She sighed with relief.

"You had been avoiding me." Josie took her chin in her fingers.

"I had problems."

"May I help?"

"You already did." The dark woman smiled.

"Glad to help." Josie kept dancing.

Helena followed her and, after a few movements, she saw her.

Blue eyes pinned by intense green.

Barbara.

She was staring at her and she was not happy. She had definitely seen the kiss. Dick was behind her with an unfriendly look on his face.

"What's wrong, Helena?" Josie asked, noticing the expression on her partner's face.

"I… I'll be right back." The brunette moved off the dance floor and walked toward the redhead with confident grace. She took the glass of wine from her table and stood in front of her mentor.

"Hi Barbara, nice to see you." She smiled.

The older woman stared at her. Her face was expressionless.

"You look great." The brunette looked at her leg, still in a cast, "How's your leg?"

"Fine. The doctor is going remove the cast next week," Barbara answered coldly, glaring toward Josie. "You seem to be having a lot of fun."

"Well…" the brunette took a sip of her wine. "A friend invited me… What are you doing here? Want to sit at my table?"

The redhead's look still was icy. "You never called me back. I left you messages."

"Oh, well, I've been busy."

"I see… very busy." Barbara nodded, biting her lower lip. "What's going on, Helena?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"Nothing." The brunette shrugged her shoulders, trying to keep still. Her mentor looked hurt, really hurt, and it broke her heart.

"All right, I've been trying to stay close and you've been running away from us, from me. If you don't want to talk," Barbara said, her voice biter, "if you don't want to tell me what's wrong, okay, it's your choice. I understand now, you were right. You don't need us anymore. I don't know why you want us to continue being a family, if you're just going to push us away."

The redhead wheeled around, turning her back to the younger woman.

Helena looked at Dick, who was still glaring angrily at her.

"Let's go, Dick," Barbara said.

He stepped toward Helena and stood a few inches from her.

"I warned you," he growled, "Keep away from my woman or…"

"I disappointed her, ok?" Helena said, clenching her teeth and balling her fists. She was fighting the temptation of hitting his stupid face. "Don't worry, I disappointed her already. She'll never want to see me again."

"I hope not." He turned and followed the redhead.

Well.

It was done.

Now she just needed a heart transplant. Hers was crushed. Long arms wrapped around her shoulders.

"What happened, Helena?"

"Nothing." She lifted her eyes and looked at the blonde, "Can we go?"

"Are you angry?"

"No, I just want to go somewhere else… with you."

"Private?" Josie bit her earlobe softly.

"Very."

Green eyes were focused on the brunette when she exited the place in the company of the blonde woman.

Hands moved over her. She wanted to forget, she wanted to stop thinking. To just be lost in the moment. Slowly, a hand brushed against her waist. Josie had her against the big bed, and when the blonde's mouth found her own, she kissed her desperately, with hard, demanding strokes.

The hands on her slid up her abdomen and skillfully cupped her breast, kneading her. When had she taken off her clothes? She was nude; she never felt her blouse removed. Wow, Josie was good at this. Her hands moved to caress the skin of the other woman, it was firm and delicate.

The pressure of Josie's fingers against her soft flesh was delicious. She moaned. That soft mouth moved to her neck, biting her pulse point. The brunette took Josie's head and moved it down, toward her breast. She growled when a warm tongue circled her nipple.

Helena buried her nose in the soft hair below her. She had just one weakness and she'd just discovered it a few months ago; but her weakness had always been there, it was her green-eyed beauty, her lovely Barbara.

She took a deep breath, wishing the woman in her arms was the redhead. But it was an impossible dream. She could only wonder when it had happened. When had she fallen in love with her? Maybe if she'd seen it coming, she could have stopped it in time.

But now it was too late.

Helena parted her lips to speak and Josie hushed her with addictive kisses, a finger delicately moved down and caressed her most sensitive part. The brunette growled again and moved her hand down toward the other's woman center, but her wrist was caught in a strong grip.

"No," Josie whispered, kissing her again "tonight you are my dessert." Her fingers pushed deep into her aching insides.

Helena gasped, her hands moved against the slope of Josie's back, trying to follow the rhythm.

Her eyes fell shut and a shudder ran through her as Josie pushed faster into her.

Helena found the rhythm and closed her eyes. Her imagination and her deep desires filled all her senses and suddenly she was there, with her. The blond hair was no longer blonde, it was red. She was there, moving with her.

She took the head and raised it toward her. The perfect mouth was there; green eyes regarding her. She trapped the lips, but not roughly. The touch was soft, delicate, exploring. Soft kisses ghosted the older woman's jaw, lobe, neck. Yes, she was there.

The movement of fingers inside her increased, carrying her to another world. She buried her face the woman's neck and held her thigh against her, trapped on the whirlwind of lust and love that consumed her.

Everything spun around.

She climaxed.

Her cry was not of pleasure; it was more about pain and release. It was mostly about loneliness and frustration, for the woman that could never be hers…

She tried to recover her breath, her nose still buried in a long, firm neck while Josie stroked the fine, damp hair on her head.

"Helena?" Josie whispered.

"Yeah?"

"You are different, no?"

"Different?" The brunette lifted her head, still breathless, and peered at her through shaggy bangs.

"You are like them, aren't you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I saw your eyes… They were like a cat's…"

Helena laughed lightly. "You're joking."

"No, I saw you when I was touching you… you're a meta human. Your eyes were…"

The thin woman closed her eyes and rolled to the other side, climbing off of Josie. She stared at the ceiling.

"I don't care." The blonde turned to look at her, resting on her elbow. "I like you. I think we can still have a lot of fun together."

"What do you know about metas?"

"That they are like humans, but they have special abilities. I have some friends like you, but… I never had a lover." Josie moved and, in a second, was on top of the brunette, "And it's fantastic." She kissed her.

"Well…"

"Don't think." Josie moved her lips toward Helena's neck, ghosting kisses. "I prefer you when you are not thinking."

"Yeah?" Helena panted, feeling her eyes change again.

"Yeah."


	15. Chapter 15

Barbara had been quiet ever since they had returned from the party at the club last night. She'd gone to bed without a word. Now she was immersed in her job, looking for a way to stop crime. People sometimes asked her what was to have like to have an eidetic memory. For her, it was a strange question since she didn't know what was NOT to have an eidetic memory. Her dad told her brain was a computer, each memory was a piece of data, stored and accessed whenever necessary. She could easily find old files and actualize them to apply to new situations.

But her eidetic memory was useless when she was trying to solve the enigma that was Helena Kyle. It was a puzzle that she had wanted to solve her entire life. The unexpected reactions, the contradictions; Helena's way of being transcended all logic.

She wanted to understand her, but how do you understand something you don't understand?

Barbara was hurt last night. Helena's attitude had hurt her. She had been cold, very different from two weeks ago. She closed her eyes and rubbed her temples. She could see her young protégé asking, "We will always be a family, right?"

That Helena was not the same one that she had encountered in the club. She needed to find out what was going on.

"What did she say to you?" Dick, dressed as Nightwing, interrupted her thoughts.

"What did who say to me?" The redhead continued typing at her keyboard, her eyeglasses perched on the bridge of her nose.

"Helena."

"Nothing." Barbara leaned closer to her monitor, reading a note that had appeared on her screen. That information was interesting.

"Why won't you tell me?" The tall man crossed his arms over his chest.

"I just went down to say hi. I hadn't seen her in weeks." Barbara moved the cursor to the bottom of the document. Yes, This info would definitely help her.

"But she said something that bothered you."

"It was something between me and her." The redhead pressed the "print" button and saved the file. 

Dick stood at her side. "Please look at me. I'm talking to you."

Barbara took a deep breath. She removed her glasses and looked at him.

"All right," she said.

"What did she say to you?"

"Dick, I don't mean to be rude, but my life my is my life and my relationship with Helena is mine, not yours."

"I want to know, we are a couple."

"Yes, but you are not me and I need my own space, just as you need yours."

Dick pinched the bridge of his nose. He was getting irritated. "Barbara, I don't want her to interfere with us."

"She isn't, she's been absent for the last month." She was tired of his jealousy "Now, you tell me, what happened between you two? Why is she avoiding the ClockTower? Why is she avoiding me?"

"I told you. She doesn't want us to be together."

"I don't believe you."

"Excuse me?"

"Helena would never do anything like that." Barbara glared at him, he was hiding something, he knew something she didn't. "What happened between you two?"

"I told you! She hates me! Barbara, she'll try anything! You don't know her!"

"I know her," she said firmly.

"Helena lies to you. She's always done it, she's like her mother," Dick growled, pacing around the place.

"Don't start with that, Selina was a wonderful woman."

"She was a burglar."

Barbara closed her eyes and lifted her index finger. She was losing her patience. "Don't….!"

"Please, Barbara!" He put his hands on the arms of her chair "You are blind! Helena is not the person you think. Her instinct is strong. She…"

"You forget that she is also the daughter of your best friend."

"I know, but…"

Barbara rubbed her eyes with her palm. She tried to not be angry, he was a good man, but she needed to end this. "Dick, please. Stop it, just stop it." She fixed her eyes on him. "I need you to understand this, Helena is my friend, she supports me; she's always been there. You don't know our fight to survive our pain during those years, how hard it was." The redhead waved her hands and bit her lip, then returned her gaze to him. "All right, she is grumpy and stubborn, but that's outside, it's her shield, everything that happened still hurts her. Inside she is a wonderful person."

He shook his head and put his hands on his waist.

"You have spent years blaming Helena for the life you never had with me," the cyber genius said.

His pace turned pale, he looked at her speechlessly.

"It's not her fault. You weren't here, she was. You can't change that. So… I'm asking you to respect her." She remained immutable. "If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything."

After a long silence, in which it became clear that Dick had nothing more to say, she turned back to the Delphi.

-------------------------

The young woman sat on a cornice. Her leg was bent over it and she rested her arm and her head on her knee, staring at the city below her. She was wearing her bird-earrings and hearing Barbara's voice while she guided Dinah on a mission.

She spent hours listening to her; she couldn't be with her, see her often, but at least she could listen to her: her laughs, her jokes; she knew her mood simply by the tone of her voice. There had been so many years with her, in her ears. The brunette sighed.

Pathetic.

She was pathetic.

Being The Huntress gave her license to kick the shit out of criminals and to channel her anger… being Huntress helped her to purge her demons without the guilt of hurting innocents. Barbara knew all of this.

Except she loved her.

But how could she expect Barbara to know if she herself didn't even know until a few weeks ago?

Barbara was an idealist in many ways, the don't kill thing, the rules, the self control, the fight for justice, all while knowing that she didn't believe in such a thing. Her mentor had been attacked by a psychopath, and still, she believed in the system, still believed that there was justice.

That incredible woman had worked so hard with her, for her; the redhead prevented her from killing herself with her own anger.

She loved her, and she wanted to justify Barbara's faith in her by being better every day. She couldn't fail her by saying: "Thanks to your hard work, I fell in love with you."

The brunette heard a scream, a man was yelling for help. Excellent, time for fun; she needed some action.

The agile crime fighter jumped off the building and ran down the street.

-------------------------

Barbara was in her father's home. He'd invited her to dinner; she needed to relax a bit. Playing with a glass of orange juice, she looked through the living room window. Her father answered a phone call.

She hadn't slept well the last few weeks. Dick kept insisting on choosing a date for their wedding, but she wasn't in the mood for that, Helena on her mind. She still couldn't understand her behavior.

Her protégée had been always impulsive, following her instincts and feelings. All those years had been she had been on the edge. The pain had almost blinded all reason. It had been very difficult to keep her under control, she had channeled all her anger and frustration in violence, she was a teenager and she had lost the most important thing in her life: her mother.

She stared at her glass.

She had grown accustomed to her life with Helena at her side; she never even considered the possibility of what her life would be without the brunette, and now… she was gone. She never thought she could miss her young partner so much.

Much more than she was able to admit.

Her eyes lifted to find a picture of her and Helena with her father on the side table. It was taken at his birthday party, two years before. She took it in her hand. Helena's smile was fresh and open. They had a lot of fun that night. She traced the brunette's face with her finger.

"Something wrong?" Jim Gordon asked, sitting on the couch next to her, a scotch in his hand.

"No, I was just thinking." She put the picture back on the table again.

"I don't see you happy with your wedding." He looked at the picture on the table. "Is it Helena? What did she do now?"

"Nothing… I… I'm worried about her, she is acting… strange. I don't know what's wrong; I asked her, but she just says she needs to work on her own."

"That was after she knew about you and Dick?"

"Yes."

"It's obvious. She's giving you space."

"She told me that… but I don't believe her."

"What do you want?"

Barbara sighed. "I'm not sure… I love Dick, but I don't want to change my life. I'm happy now with the girls around. Dick is possessive sometimes and doesn't let me breathe. I wsh he'd give me more space."

The old man took a sip from his glass before putting it on the table. He wondered if she was listening to herself. "Barbara…"

"Yes?"

"Are you sure you want to marry him?"

The question startled her, she remained silent a few seconds, considering her father's question and how to answer it. That was an odd question. Of course she wanted to marry him. They had some differences, but they had so much in common. Yes, sometimes she wasn't satisfied with him, but… no relationship was perfect. She was sure they would work out their small differences and everything would be okay.

"Yes…" she finally said.

He looked at his watch, "Took you twenty seconds to answer me… You are not sure." He took out his pipe.

"Dad! Don't analyze me as if I were one of your cases." She rolled her eyes.

"I'm not. It's just that your reactions tell to me something different than your words." He lighted the pipe. "I need to tell you something, I didn't do it before because you were recovering and I didn't want… well…"

"Tell me what?" She looked at him curiously.

"About Dick and Helena."

"You know what's happening? Please tell me…"

"Did you know that Dick hit Helena?"

Green eyes opened wide. She was speechless.

"I see from your reaction that you didn't know." The old man continued, "I don't know exactly what happened. I arrived at your room when you were recovering, Dick was standing over her, I pushed him out. Dinah went to check Helena, we thought he had broken her nose… later Dinah came back alone. Helena left."

"What happened, why did they fight? What did Dinah say?"

"No, no, they didn't fight, something happened and he hit her, she didn't defend herself or hit him back. When Dinah returned to the room, she told me they had argued and he had become angry."

"That's all? And him? What did he say?"

"He didn't say anything. Whatever his reason, it doesn't justify hitting a woman. I haven't seen Helena since then."

Barbara bit her lower lip. She needed to talk to someone. She took her father's hand.

"Thanks, Dad."

-------------------------

Barbara worked at the Delphi. Well, she was trying to work. Her father's revelation was… shocking. She never expected such a violent reaction from Dick. How dare he hit a woman? Especially Helena. She always thought he was a gentleman. Why hadn't Helena responded to his attack? She was far from being a pacifist. And why hadn't Dinah said anything about the incident? Why was everybody hiding the incident from her?

That pissed her off. She wasn't a child, and they'd had been hiding everything. Many questions twirled around in her head. She needed to know what the argument had been that day at the hospital.

The redhead was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn't hear the ding of the elevator, announcing that someone had arrived.

She felt a hand on her shoulder.

Dick.

He leaned in to kiss her cheek, but she moved her face to the side to avoid him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked.

She turned to face him. Her look was not friendly.

"Why did you hit Helena?" she asked, her voice icy.

The tall man was surprised by the question. "Excuse me?"

"Why did you hit Helena at the hospital?"

He shook his head and crossed his arms. Surely Helena was trying to separate them again.

"Who told you?" he asked, annoyed "Her? I imagine so… and I imagine she told you that she was the victim, no? What lie did she tell you now to break us up?"

"It doesn't matter who told me," he was not going to distract her from the point, "I'm asking why you hit her."

"She doesn't want us to be together."

"She don't want us to be together!" Barbara said in a hard voice. "Please stop it!"

"I'm telling you the truth! I'm not lying, she's lying, she always lies!!"

"Dick! I asked you why you hit her!"

"She was kissing you! She loves you!!"

The redhead blinked, trying to understand.

"She was kissing you, Barbara! I saw her!" he said in exasperation. "It made me crazy and I hit her! She is ungrateful! She was taking advantage of you! She…"

"Stop!" Dinah's voice called. The teen walked onto the platform, visibly angry.

"What?" Dick growled, facing her "Tell her I'm lying, tell her we didn't see Helena kissing her, taking advantage of her!!"

"That's not true, you are always trying to talk bad about her, she would never try to take advantage of her! She respects Barbara too much!"

"We saw her kissing her!"

"Yes, but she not was raping her as you keep implying!"

"Wait a minute!" Barbara raised her hand; everything was out of control. "What is going on here?"

"She loves you Barbara and not as a friend," Dick said, his fists clenched as he gazed at her. "That's why she keeps trying to separate us."

"Shut up, Dick." Dinah rolled her eyes, "She has never said that or done anything, please!"

"Hold it!" Barbara almost shouted. She closed her eyes for a few seconds and tried to organize her thoughts. She took a breath and opened her eyes slowly, looking at Dinah. "What is that about Helena loving me?"

Dinah brushed her hair back nervously. "It's true…" she said with a low voice. "I asked her, she loves you, but…"

"See?? I told you!!" the tall man yelled.

"Dick, please!" Barbara glared at him. She sighed and turned back to her young ward; she needed to know what was happening. "I'm listening, Dinah."

"She didn't know she loved you until a few months ago," the teen explained softly, "she was trying to deny it at first, from herself, and when she saw it was stronger than she was, she tried to hide it from you. She's afraid that you will be ashamed of her. She said you've done so much for her and this will disappoint you… She doesn't want you to stay away from Dick. She knows you love him, but when she saw you almost dying in that hospital bed she couldn't avoid kissing you. It was a gentle kiss, she was not ravaging you… That was when we walked in…" She locked her eyes on Dick "and he attacked her without warning, he surprised her and he would have hit her again, if I hadn't stopped him."

"She was kissing her!" Grayson growled.

"Dick!!" The redhead clenched her teeth.

"Why don't you tell her that you have been blackmailing Helena?" Dinah spit at him. The blonde was finding that she really didn't like Dick at all. She couldn't imagine him living here…

Green eyes locked on the dark man. She lifted her brow. Things were becoming most interesting and she was extremely pissed off.

"Dick told her that if he saw her near you, he would tell you that she loves you. Helena didn't want you to know because she's afraid. That's why Helena doesn't want to come here!"

The redhead squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed her forehead with the palm of her hand, trying vainly to organize her thoughts.

"Barbara…" Dick kneeled next to her and held her hand in his.

"Are you blackmailing her?" Barbara asked him.

"I'm sorry, it was the only way to keep her away from us…" he explained. "But I love you, I don't want anyone interfering in our relationship."

Barbara touched Dinah's arm "Could you please leave us alone, Dinah?"

"But…"

"Please…"

The teen nodded and, crossing her arms, she walked toward her room.


	16. Chapter 16

**Thanks for all your post and comments, it's really nice, i'll love say thanks too to nightstalker, she is a great editor... Love you night!!! **

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The redhead wheeled inside the Dark Horse bar, she looked around and found her goal: Helena was working behind the bar as usual. She was beautiful, and looked great in that outfit she was wearing. A big smile filled her face; she was so happy to see her again.

The brunette gave beers to two young men in front of her. Another customer arrived and asked for a scotch. She looked for an empty glass under the counter. She had spent the last weeks focused on her job and sweeps. She wanted to fill the emptiness. She was trying to not think about Barbara and wasn't having much success.

Maybe she needed to increase her time on sweeps and kick more asses.

Fucking Dick Grayson.

She gave the glass to the customer and wiped the counter.

"Helena…"

Surprised, the young woman lifted her head, recognizing the voice immediately.

"Barbara…" Her heart jumped. The redhead looked gorgeous in that orange and red sweater. She hadn't seen her in almost two weeks.

"Hi, you keep ducking my calls."

The young woman, ashamed, tried to say something, but the redhead didn't give her an opportunity.

"It doesn't matter. I need to talk to you now."

Helena knew she was cornered and she didn't have anywhere to hide or run. "Yeah, sure… give me a second."

The redhead wheeled toward a table in the corner. Helena wiped the counter again before putting the cloth under it; she wondered what Barbara's lecture would be about this time. She asked her co-worker to keep an eye on her place and went toward Barbara. She put a glass of orange juice on the table.

"You favorite," she said, smiling at the redhead.

"Thanks. How have you been?"

"Fine, I'm fine…" The brunette sat in front of her.

"How is your girlfriend?"

The brunette blushed and avoided Barbara's eyes. "She isn't my girlfriend…"

"She kissed you. You broke up with Reese for her?"

Helena wanted to scream, no, that it had all been for her, but she couldn't. "She's just a friend." She turned and waved to a familiar customer at a table a few meters away.

"Very friendly, your friend." The redhead raised her brow. "Why are you hiding from me?"

"I'm not hiding," Helena laughed, smiling at a handsome guy at the bar, "Who told you that? I've been busy."

Helena felt Barbara's eyes on her. It made her nervous. Her green eyes stopped on her neck.

"I see you still have the necklace," the older woman noted. "What are you afraid of?" Barbara taunted her.

"Nothing, why?."

The redhead knew it was the perfect moment to formulate her question: "My father told me he saw you and Dick arguing while I was unconscious at the hospital." The trick worked, she noticed how the girl's face lost color. She smirked and took a sip of her juice.

"Breathe, Hel." She put her glass on the table.

"What… did he tell you?"

"Something that Dinah, Dick and you should have told me before."

Helena wondered if she could be so lucky as to have an earthquake strike New Gotham at that moment; the land could open up and swallow her.

"You are avoiding us because of Dick." The redhead crossed her arms on the table.

"No…" She was definitely caged.

"No? So tell me why, and don't give me that bullshit about you wanting to work on your own."

The young crime fighter found herself pinned by deep green eyes.

"Barbara…"

"I talked to Dick..." the older woman said, not giving her an opportunity to answer.

Helena held her breath. Damn… she was dead.

"This is not easy for me, but… I needed to do it." Barbara noticed the other woman was close to fainting, maybe it was a bad idea to push her too far, it would be good to give her a break. "Dick has been manipulating you. I know, I'm not stupid, and he went too far… I didn't stop him in time. It's my fault and I'm sorry."

"Don't worry, Barbara, we…"

"Let me finish, please," the red head raised her hand, "He's changed, I've changed… We're different."

"Are you kidding?" the brunette frowned.

Barbara shook her head. "Something happened between us over the years… My environment and his environment are very different. I need my own space." She lifted her eyes, Helena's were glued to her, listening, trying to understand where was she going. "He's terribly jealous. He can't accept that you and I have a life together. We survived the Joker, our personality differences, our frustrations. We fought against our demons… We fought together, we won, and he wasn't there… he can't accept that."

"I'm sorry…" the brunette lowered her head, she didn't want be the cause of problems between her and Dick "I didn't…"

"Helena, don't feel bad, this is not about you or about me…" The redhead took her hand.

The touch of those long fingers electrified the young woman. She couldn't believe how powerful the contact with a hand could be.

"Are you listening to me?" Barbara asked, noticing Helena seemed to be in another world.

"Yes, sorry… It's just that I don't want…"

"Hel, I've been thinking so much the last few days, and I discovered that Dick and I were together mostly because we are used to being together. It's a fine line that separates it from love. I don't love him… and if I did love him, I would never let him break my family apart as he has done now… I asked him to leave."

Blue eyes blinked. "But, Barbara, you love him, you can't!

"I can, I know what I'm doing."

"Did he tell you?"

"Did he tell me what?"

Helena remained silent. She didn't know what to do. Why did she fall in love with a person she could never have? Oracle was the straightest of all the straight women in the world.

The older woman read the confusion in her eyes. She knew it wouldn't be a good idea to push her too much or tell her what she knew, if she wanted her back. She kept her eyes on Helena's; she knew she could read her protégée's feelings in them.

"Listen, he was completely unfair to you. I apologize for that. I know your speech was an excuse because you didn't want to cause me any problems. I know it's a lie, and I want you back. We have worked too hard for this… Helena, please, come back; we need you."

"We…"

"Yes, we… Dinah, Alfred, me…"

"Wait, wait…" the brunette waved her hands, "He isn't going to like this. Did you discuss this with him?"

"Don't you understand? I don't care what he thinks, I broke it off, we are not going to get married."

"Helena!" a guy called her. "Leonard is asking for you."

"A minute!" she said, leaning back in her chair.

"I don't want to interfere with your job," the redhead said. "I just came here to ask you to come back. I know you didn't want interfere with us and that you did this out of love… I appreciate it, but I don't want you to sacrifice your \self for me. And even more so if it's for something that doesn't exist."

"But…"

"Besides… I need my former physical therapist back." The redhead smiled "We'll wait for you tomorrow for dinner. And after that we can do some sweeps. A nasty drug band is infiltrating the schools." She wheeled back.

The brunette followed her with her eyes. She was confused and afraid. What if Dick had opened his big mouth?

Barbara stopped and turned to see her. "Alfred told me that he will make lasagna for you." She winked before wheeling toward the exit.

"Kyle!" Leonard shouted.

"I'm coming!" she shouted back. "I'm coming!"

-------------------------

Dinah looked at her watch. It had been more than three hours since she had left Barbara alone with Dick, the place was silent. It was one o'clock in the morning. She was nervous; she didn't know how her mentor would react to the revelation. She might be really angry with her for not telling her what had happened at the hospital. She opened the door of her room and looked outside. The lights were off. She walked toward Barbara's room.

Empty.

She went toward the Delphi. It was in its usual mode. The screens were on, but her mentor was not there either. The teen looked upstairs. Her steps took her toward the balcony. The redhead was there, engulfed in the dark night. Her elbows and upper arms rested on her legs while she stared at her laced fingers.

She stood there in silence, thinking, what should she do? Say something or leave her alone? Maybe ask her how she felt? No… that was stupid.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Barbara asked suddenly.

Dinah was speechless as she tried to figure out how to answer.

"I'd like to know, maybe I could understand this better," the redhead whispered, looking toward the city below her.

"I'm sorry…" the teen stood next to her. "Helena didn't want you know."

"But I deserved to know." The redhead raised her head to meet her young ward's eyes. "He wasn't fair to her. That was low. He blackmailed her with her feelings."

The teen lowered her head.

"Helena is not guilty for her feelings; she didn't want to hurt anyone. And he used it to hurt her and to keep her away from us, he broke up our team because of his stupid jealousy," the older woman said with a soft voice, trying to not sound annoyed. None of this was Dinah's fault.

"I'm sorry…. She was sad and afraid."

"Don't worry…" Barbara touched her hand. "It's not your fault or Helena's. I'm just tired of all his jealousy. We are not going to get married."

"What?" the teen responded, surprised.

"Dinah, we can't… he wants me to be something I'm not, he wants to control my life and, worst of all, her tried to separate me from the people that I love. I don't recognize him; he hit her, he tried to make me hate her and he played with her feelings."

Dinah looked her spechless.

"I slapped him." Barbara said.

"What?" The teen grinned. God! How she wished see could have seen that. She'd wanted to kick his ass so badly.

"I couldn't stop myself… He was so unfair with her and he tried to make me hate her, he tried to separate us. I will never forgive him for that. I broke it off. I asked him to leave." The older woman met Dinah's blue eyes.

"But Barbara…" the young woman was concerned. Was she serious?

"Don't worry, I'm okay. I should have done it long ago." She smiled softly. "I didn't feel comfortable with him; I felt something was wrong."

"You love him…"

"No, I don't think so… I was really relieved when he left," she admitted. "It was like a big burden had lifted from my shoulders… I think I was just accustomed to him. We had been friends so long, when he returned a few months ago… well, you know how women are..." she laughed lightly, "We are vain, we like to know that men like us. He made me feel desired… attractive. But… I don't love him."

"I'm sorry." Dinah sat in front of her guardian. She was still concerned, she didn't expect this… but inside she really wanted them to break up. Dick was an asshole. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm okay, really," Barbara said. "And it was an incredible feeling when he left the Tower."

Dinah hesitated before asking, "And Helena?"

"I just talked to her…"

"You did…?" The teen blinked. "When?"

"I just came back. After Dick left, I went to see her. I needed to apologize, he was unfair to her. I asked her to come back."

"Did you tell her?"

"What?"

The teen fixed her pale blue eyes on her mentor. "You know what I mean."

Barbara shook her head. "I know… she would feel ashamed and refuse to come back with us. Don't tell her that I know it."

"But…"

"Dinah, I can't love her," the redhead said, feeling tears in her eyes "I can't… but I want her back with us. Please, I'm sure she will find someone else. She will find someone who loves her totally; she's a wonderful girl. But it will be easier for her if she still believes I don't know her secret."

The teen knew she was right. If Helena knew that Barbara knew her secret, she would not come back. The teen nodded. She wanted Helena to come back, too. "All right."

"Can I tell you a secret?" Barbara asked.

"Sure…."

"It felt really good when I hit him."

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The redhead stared at the city below her feet. It was day break, she couldn't sleep all night thinking. She wondered if Helena would return to the Tower. She was unpredictable, stubborn, grumpy… She'd always been like that.

Simply Helena.

And she missed her anyway.

"You doubt she will come back," Alfred said from behind her.

"Yes," the redhead nodded.

"Why?"

"It's something you wouldn't understand…"

"Do you think that the fact that she is in love with you will affect her decision?"

Green eyes turned and blinked at him. He knew? "What?"

"She will be back, you know. She can't be far from you for long You are her only refuge. She doesn't have any safer home than with you."

"I don't like that responsibility. I don't want her to be in love with me."

"Why not? Are you afraid of accepting something that you never think about?"

"I'm not afraid of anything," Barbara said.

"You have always lived by rules and old habits." Alfred smiled, walking inside the Tower, "Maybe it is time to think that a life exists beyond rules and habits. Dinner is ready, Miss Barbara."

She shook her head. Alfred always was so Alfred. She sighed and looked back to the city. She could only wait.

Wait for her to return.


	17. Chapter 17

Dinah was doing her homework in the living room. She turned and jumped in her place when she saw a dark figure standing in front of her and put her hand over her chest. She hated her partner sometimes for being so silent.

"Crap!!! Helena! Don't do that again!"

The brunette laughed, "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to scare you."

The blonde hugged her. "I'm glad you're back! You are back, right?"

"Well…"

Helena hid her eyes behind her bangs when she ducked her head. "I'm…" she looked behind her for an instant, trying to be sure no one was listening. "She knows?"

Dinah frowned. "What?"

"Come on. Dick told her? She knows?"

"… No…"

"He didn't tell her?"

"No, she told me she was tired of him trying to control her life…"

Helena ran a hand through her hair. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. How are you?"

"Okay."

Dinah was concerned for her, she touched her shoulder. "Do you think you can do it?"

"What?"

"Be near her… and not tell her anything."

"I will…" The brunette smiled sadly. "I have survived worse things? And… being near her is much better than being far away. How is your arm?"

"Better, the doctor said I will be okay in two more weeks."

"Excellent! That means I can patrol without having to be your nanny."

"You are not my nanny."

"I am."

"No, you aren't."

Helena couldn't believe how good it felt to be back at the place that they called home.

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She hummed an old song; the last few days she had felt extremely happy. Things were normal again. Helena was back and had been playful and attentive to her all the time. She filled her cup with coffee and wheeled back. On the table were cookies, great, Alfred had baked them and they were still warm.

Barbara realized, at that moment, something she'd never thought about. She could feel Helena, it was easy to know when she was near, it was like something instinctive. She was charged with a special power that made the environment of the Tower change, it was energized She'd missed that.

Where was everyone? It was almost mid-day and she hadn't seen anyone yet. She wheeled toward the Delphi wondering at which moment her young ward had fallen in love with her. She wasn't very attractive, she was more like a library mouse. She'd always thought Helena needed some one like her: aggressive, passionate, young…

Maybe Helena's love for her was only an illusion. In some ways, it scared her a bit.

She was sure she would forget that feeling soon… with her new 'friend'. That woman was not the right person for Helena, that was a fact. She had seen them kissing and remembering it still put her in a bad mood. She 'd given Helena extra jobs on sweeps at night to be sure she didn't have time to see her.

But she had a good excuse for doing it, she wanted the best person for Helena, yes, that was it. She was a great girl and she deserved a great person.

Helena watched her from upstairs.

She liked to watch her. Maybe she didn't know it, but she was sexy, very sexy. She always dressed conservatively, but, still, it was sexy. It was like something in her, she didn't need to make an effort to be, any movement by her was sexy. The way she took her glasses in her hands, the way she looked, her laugh. Her long red hair falling over her shoulders.

Oracle had been a little… possessive? In the last week, she had been looking for excuses to keep her on sweeps until late… or very early. Well, rescuing a cat stuck in a tree couldn't exactly be called a 'mission'. Maybe she'd been hallucinating because the redhead had seemed most loving with her… probably just a crazy trick of her mind.

The woman in the work station lifted her eyes and looked at her; she was leaning against the rail of the second floor, a lollipop in her mouth.

"Something wrong?" she asked, smiling.

Helena took the lollipop out of her mouth. "I was wondering if you would like… to come with me."

"Go with you? Where?"

"Well, that's a surprise." Helena walked downstairs.

"Surprise?" Barbara looked at the calendar on her computer. "What day is today?"

"Today is Be Lazy Day and, besides, your leg is still healing."

Barbara turned her head and saw the lithe woman walking toward her; the clothes she was wearing looked terrific on her; what was her obsession with always showing her belly? Maybe she knew it made eyes glue to her… including hers.

She blinked and raised her eyes from her protégé's abdomen to meet curious blue eyes. Helena was smirking at her.

"So?" the brunette asked.

"So?" The redhead cleared her throat.

"Come with me?"

"Where?"

The young woman turned and walked toward the elevator. "Come with me, I'll show you."

"But…" Barbara looked at her monitors, "I'm working…"

The brunette walked back and leaned down in front of Barbara, her face inches away. "And… tell me… when are you not working?"

That was true. She was always working.

"Come on. We have time."

"I…"

"You think too much," the young woman said, standing up behind her, pushing her wheelchair "Stop thinking for just one day. Give your brain cells a bit of rest, you are killing them."

"But, Helena, I…"

Helena ignored her protest and cocked her head. "Could you please press the 'forward' button? This chair is frickin' heavy."

Barbara laughed, "All right. Where are we going?"

"Don't be so nosy…"

The brunette drove the Hummer toward a small Italian restaurant near the center of town; Barbara recognized it immediately, it was her favorite restaurant; she hadn't visited it in ages.

"Hey… Great!" she said. That was sweet. She wheeled inside, followed by the young woman.

When she opened the door she found her father, Dinah, Alfred and several friends from school, the police department and the library there. A big "Happy Birthday" sign was on the wall.

"Surprise!!!" they shouted.

"Oh damn…" Barbara mumbled "I forgot…"

"We know." Helena said, a big grin on her face, "That's why we decided to remind you."

The redhead stretched out her arms and Helena leaned to hug her.

"Thanks so much!" Barbara said.

The brunette buried her nose in her soft hair and lost herself for a few seconds in her smell. "Happy birthday, Barbara."

James Gordon raised his cup. "A toast for Barbara!"

"Toast!" everybody called in unison.

Lunch was excellent and everyone was having fun. The former Batgirl forgot her cyber world for a few hours, and it felt nice. Jim Gordon sat next to Helena with a scotch.

"Hey, how are you?" he said, hitting her playfully with his elbow.

"Very good, trying to get drunk… but my budget is short."

"Uh?"

"It's very expensive when you're meta."

"Why?"

"Do you know how much money it costs me to get drunk? I have to drink way more alcohol than normal to be drunk."

He laughed. "That's true. Let me get you the next one." He raised his hand, calling the waiter "Another tequila here, please."

"Good choice."

"She looks happy." Gordon looked at his daughter.

"She is…" Helena sipped a bit of her drink.

"I thought she would be depressed because of Dick."

"She said they had big differences, that they had changed."

"Why did he hit you, Helena? I never had an opportunity to ask."

"He was jealous." She hid her eyes behind her bangs.

"Just for that? I don't think it was a good reason, you two were in a hospital room." Gordon lit his cigarette.

"He is explosive…"

"It doesn't surprise me, it surprises me that you didn't hit him back."

"As you said, we were in a hospital. He asked me to leave and I didn't want to… He was upset for her. I think it was the stress."

"And it's very strange to hear you defending him."

Helena smiled. "Yeah… but, well, she was sick, I didn't want to upset her."

"Yes, that's true," he agreed. "Smart decision. Now," he lifted his hand, "we need another other bottle here."

"Huh?" Helena was confused.

"I'm going to finance your drinking tonight. We need to celebrate having Barbara back."

She smirked. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

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"I'm going to kill my father," Barbara grumbled.

"Hey, it was a fun party," Helena giggled.

"Which was the most fun part? You throwing up?" Dinah smirked, pushing the brunette toward the shower.

"You are a big kid." Barbara rolled her eyes.

Helena stumbled and then stood back up. "No cold shower."

"Of course not! Come on!" Dinah pushed her again.

"Why I can't I go back to my place?" The brunette looked at the blonde.

"Because you want to go there to keep drinking and you'll be in trouble."

"I don't want her to bathe me, I can bathe alone!" Helena pointed at Dinah.

"All right, just go shower or I'll kick your ass," Barbara growled.

"All right." Singing, but walking hesitantly, the brunette went toward the bathroom.

Dinah crossed her arms and grinned.

The redhead turned toward the kitchen "I'll make some strong coffee."

"I'm going to bed." Dinah smiled. "Can you deal with your big baby alone?"

"I always do it, don't worry."

She heard her name far away. Very far. Soft claps on her cheeks made her open her eyes. Where the hell was she? Barbara was in front of her? What was Barbara doing…? Wait, what was she doing in Barbara's bathroom?

"Come on Helena." The red head put a dry towel around her. "Up."

The brunette looked at the towel, what was…? Damn... she was nude. Oh, now she remembered, she had been taking a shower and she sat on the small bench, she must have fallen asleep. She held the towel around herself and stood up, but everything was spinning.

"Here, put your hands here." Barbara noticed her movements were erratic and patted the back of her wheelchair.

"Huh?"

Barbara took her hands and put them on the back of her wheelchair. "Here… Just follow me. Jesus, you are really drunk. I'm going to kill him."

"Why? He's nice."

"He got you drunk, What were you two thinking?" The redhead wheeled toward her bedroom, Helena following her.

"He told me he could get me drunk," Helena slurred her words, raising her finger, "I told him not possible, not possible."

"Yes, I see how impossible it was."

"He cheated…"

"Yes, sure, come on. Sit down."

"We're here?" The brunette didn't know how they got there, but they were in Barbara's bedroom.

"Sit."

Helena obeyed and closed her eyes. Barbara gave her the coffee and she drank it all. Afterwards, she felt soft hands toweling her hair dry. When the marvelous hands moved to her face and neck, she shivered. Barbara made her bend forward; long fingers were on her back, stroking softly. The young woman closed her eyes and surrendered to the heavenly feeling. She had dreamed of this so many nights, feeling Barbara's fingers touching her.

Barbara helped her sit up again and her hands moved slower. She felt the muscles of her abdomen contract when the towel brushed against them with gentle movements.

She was becoming aroused, she caught the redhead's hand when it was under her left breast. She raised it and kissed her palm softly and moved it toward her cheek. She was soft, very soft and her essence was unique.

She opened her eyes slowly. She was there, in all her beauty. Loving green eyes looking at her; long red hair smelling of oranges, falling over her shoulders. Her heart was aching, her eyes turned feral.

God! She loved this woman so much.

She lifted her hand and let her index finger touch the familiar face; she traced a perfect eyebrow and moved it down slowly over her cheek, the skin was soft. She stopped her finger next to her lips; her eyes fixed on them. She wanted to touch her lips… no, not just touch…taste them, lose herself in exploring her, caressing…

No way…

She moved her hand back and lowered her head, closing her eyes. What the fuck was she doing? She hoped Barbara hadn't noticed the desire in her eyes.

"Helena?" Barbara asked.

The brunette didn't respond. The older woman took her chin lifted her face.

"Hel?"

She couldn't hold it anymore. She leaned forward and hugged her, burying her nose in her soft red hair, scenting her. She couldn't fail her, she couldn't tell her how much she loved her. She wanted to freeze time and just stay here with the woman she loved.

"Are you all right?" Barbara asked again, concerned.

Helena moved back. "I… I gotta go…" She tried to stand, but Barbara held her down.

"You're drunk… put this on and lie on the bed." Barbara gave her an clean oversized shirt and some underwear.

"Those are mine?" The brunette pointed at the underwear.

"Yes, they're yours." The redhead helped her with the shirt.

"How I know that's mine and not yours?" the young woman slurred.

"I don't wear threads as underwear."

Helena thought about that while Barbara buttoned the shirt. It was hard to concentrate with her hands on her.

"True..." she finally said.

"Now, lie down."

Helena shook her head, the idea of sleeping with her was not good, she was drunk and turned on. "… I… I think I'll go… to the couch…"

"Lie down now." Barbara said firmly.

Knowing she couldn't argue with her, she obeyed again, resting her head on the pillow and covering herself with the bedspread, all the way to her neck, holding it hard and closing her eyes.

Shit, she could smell her everywhere. It was making her crazy. Maybe if she could just lie still, not move and let sleep take her. Focus, Barbara had taught her that.

Focus.

She felt the mattress sink and she squeezed her eyes shut. She was close to her.

Focus. Focus.

She felt Barbara's eyes on her. She opened her eyes again. The redhead was looking at her.

"Breathe."

The young woman exhaled noisily. "Sorry…"

"Something wrong?" Barbara asked.

"Uhm… no… why?"

"Why are you covered from head to foot. You have a death grip on the bedspread. Are you afraid that it will escape?"

"No, I'm seasick."

"I'd imagine so." The redhead turned off her light. "You finished off almost all the liquor.

The brunette laughed. "Yeah… I guess Jim is bankrupt after paying the bill."

Barbara laughed too. "Yes, but he deserves it, he taunted you."

"And I won fifty dollars…"

"What? You did…?"

"We had a bet…"

"You two are in trouble…"

"Great, just punish me tomorrow… I can´t defend myself right now."

Barbara remained silent. The brunette still felt the world moving around her and closed her eyes. Now, again with the Zen thing, focus on sleep, not on the soft smell of the redhead. She was alone, Barbara was not there. She was at her old place over the Dark Horse with the red neon light blinking in her living room all night..

"Hel?"

Crap. How was the Zen thing supposed to work if Barbara kept talking?

"Yeah?" the young woman slurred.

"May I hug you?"

Blue eyes snapped open.

Big double crap.

What?

"I… I can't explain…" Barbara muttered, "I just want to."

Focus, no touching. Just a hug.

Taking a deep breath, Helena rolled on her side and hugged her mentor. The feeling was amazing. The softness of the red hair under her fingertips; the solid strength of the bare warm skin; she buried her nose in red hair breathing her scent. Her nostrils flared. That scent followed her into her lusty dreams.

"I missed you." Warm breath whispered in her ear made the brunette shiver.

Helena rubbed her cheek against that firm shoulder and purred; her rumbling echoed throughout her body. She wanted that woman.

She kissed her shoulder and slowly turned her head and kissed her cheek. She felt the older woman tense in her arms.

Breathe.

Focus.

She rolled back to the bed. Her body was screaming at the loss of the warm body under her touch.

"Thanks for coming back…" Barbara said softly.

"Sure." Helena felt a great relief and turned on her side, turning her back to the other woman. It seemed as though Barbara hadn't noticed her arousal and she tried to move her mind away from the temptation to kiss and touch that woman.

"Good night," the red head whispered.

"Night, Barbara."

Focus, focus.

The brunette closed her eyes; enveloped by the warm feeling of being in Barbara's bed; of being so close to the woman that she loved so much.

It was as if heaven and hell had merged and come to rest in Barbara's bed.


	18. Chapter 18

"I'm not sure," the blonde said into the phone. "Just give me a bit more time, we've only been checking this option since a few months ago." She heard the doorbell. "All right. Done. See you."

The woman hung up the phone and walked toward the door. She was surprised when she saw that thin, young woman in the doorway. She put her right hand on the frame and glared at her.

"Where have you been?" she asked "I've been calling you. You don't return my calls."

"Well, I've been a bit busy," Helena smirked. "But if you want, I can stay tonight and show you that I missed you."

Josie took her hand and pulled her against her, kissing her softly. "I missed you too."

"What if you invite me in for a drink?" Helena suggested.

"What if we forget the drink and you come in and get to know my new bedroom?" She put her arms around Helena's neck and kissed her again, "I have great plans for you tonight."

"Love the idea."

Josie kissed her neck and shoulders. The brunette let the other woman be in charge. She was hurt, she couldn't have the woman she wanted, she never could and she didn't want to think about it. She wanted to forget, so she let Josie do what she wanted, so she could feel something other than the pain of not having Barbara with her.

-----------------------------------------------

Helena stared at the city below. Barbara filled her dreams and thoughts, everything reminded her. The woman was very sexy and she didn't seem to notice it. Her movements, her look.

Everything, anything turned her on.

She rubbed her eyes with her free hand. Damn, some times her hormones were so annoying. Barbara was far from stupid. She would figure out what was going on if she wasn't careful. She was angry with herself, she could have any woman or man she wanted. She wondered if all meta humans had the same sex drive as she seemed to experience. Well, whatever, her stupid heart had chosen the impossible. She would screw up her entire relationship with Barbara over that.

At which moment she had fallen in love? That wasn't in her plans. That had been so stupid. Now she had to work on forgetting the redhead.

She walked toward the pommel horse.

But how could Helena forget her? She was the light of her life. Everything about her was beautiful. Every fiber of her being knew that seeing Barbara everyday was as necessary as oxygen for her lungs... And like oxygen, she couldn't touch her. Just dream.

And it hurt.

She jumped on the horse pommel and began her routine.

Life was so unfair. It had hurt Barbara and her so much. Her desire for Barbara was killing her and it would kill Barbara too, if she knew. She couldn't break her heart.

After a long hour, she put her hands on her knees and bent over to recover her breath; she put a towel around her neck and went toward the shower. Hearing an insistent buzz downstairs, she stopped in the middle of the corridor and peeked over the rail. Barbara was on the middle of the ramp pushing the buttons on her wheelchair. The chair was making strange sounds.

"Come on," the red head growled.

"What´s going on?" Helena asked curiously.

"I don't know." The redhead pressed the buttons of her wheelchair, but it refused to move. "Something is malfunctioning."

Helena walked downstairs while Barbara kept fighting with her wheelchair.

"Damn," the red head growled, "It's broken."

"Where were you going?" the brunette stood next to her.

"I need to take a shower, I have an appointment at six with the doctor, he is going to remove my cast."

"Do you want a ride to the shower?."

The redhead exhaled, visibly annoyed, "Not fun."

"Come on, Babs," the young woman extended her hands to her. "I'll take you to your shower and then look for your manual chair."

"All right." The redhead raised her arms and moved them around Helena's neck.

The dark woman lifted her up easily. It felt so good to have the older woman in her arms. She was not heavy.

"I feel stupid," the older woman said.

"I feel like Superman rescuing the young lady."

Barbara couldn't avoid laughing. "Don't be silly."

"Well, I am."

The brunette went toward Barbara´s bedroom and sat her on the bench in the middle of the bathroom. She turned and opened the closet.

"What do you want?"

"My green dress please."

"I hate this," Barbara said unfastening the buttons on her blouse." This always happens when I'm in a hurry."

Helena picked up a pair of green shoes and turned. The redhead had completely removed her blouse and began to undo her bra. Helena blushed and avoided looking at her, laying the dress next to her.

"I'll go look for you manual chair," the brunette said.

"Wait, I need you to help me to the shower bench. Please give me the plastic in the first drawer, I need to cover my leg in the cast."

Helena locked her eyes on the figure before her. She was incredibly beautiful. Her face, her perfect breasts, her abs… just amazing.

"Helena…" Barbara's voice pulled her from her thoughts, "I'm talking to you."

"Hmm?" she blinked.

"The plastic bag inside the drawer, I need to cover the cast with it."

"Oh, sure." She turned and opened the drawer. She was getting nervous, that was not good. She put the bag around the cast, doing her best to avoiding looking at the redhead and stood up.

The older woman frowned and watched her friend. A hint of red color filled her cheeks, and it wasn't from the exercise she'd just finished. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah…" Helena looked at her feet.

"Doesn't look like it."

"Uhmm… I need to get your wheelchair."

"All right, just help me to the shower."

"Oh…" the brunette looked around, she took a towel and covered her mentor before putting one arm behind her knees and the other around her back.

Barbara held in her laugh, Helena was embarrassed to see her nude. She looked terribly cute when she blushed.

"What's going on with you?" the redhead asked.

"Taking you to the shower." Helena opened the shower door with her foot and walked inside.

"I know but…"

The brunette set her on the bench and stepped back, never looking at her mentor. "I'll get your chair."

The redhead nodded, Helena was really nervous, she couldn't believe it. She was acting like a teenager. She lowered her head and closed the shower door before turning on the water.

Warm drops fell on her skin. She closed her eyes. She needed to be careful, the poor girl was trying to hide her feelings and, without conscious thought, she was pushing her, trying to prove… what?

The guilt had started to hit her, she couldn't love Helena back; she was a wonderful and lovely girl, behind all her dark moods and her anger, was a generous and sweet heart.

Helena was young, strong, full of life, incredibly beautiful. How was it even possible that she looked at her like that? She was older… disabled. She hated to say it, but that was reality. What could she offer Helena with only half of herself to give?

And besides, she didn't date girls.

She was straight, totally straight.

Helena liked women and men, she was open about it. She didn't care, but she… she was different. She only dated men but she respected other decisions or preferences. Helena could date whoever she wanted.

Well, except the girl she had been dating lately.

She didn't like that girl.

Her protégée needed someone who really cared for her and wasn't just having fun with her.

She needed someone who knew her, who loved her and could care for her. She sighed. Maybe she was becoming overprotective. Maybe Helena was old enough and independent enough to make her own decisions.

Whatever.

It was late. She picked up the bottle of shampoo and poured some on her head.

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Helena walked outside the bar after her shift. She put on her long coat to start a night of sweeps. Oracle had called her and Helena told her she'd be at Clock Tower in a few minutes. She turned her usual corner to jump to the next building when her sixth sense alerted her. She turned and looked around, her gaze stopped on a dark shadow below a stairway.

Her eyes turned feral.

"Hi, little one." The shadow walked toward the light.

"Josie?" Helena cocked her head. "What are you doing here?"

"I was waiting for you. I know you finish your round at this time." The woman walked toward her. "I looked for you all day again."

"Sorry, Josie…"

The taller woman put her arms around her neck and kissed her softly. "Where are you going?"

"I… well…" Helena tried to think of a good excuse.

"I know we just have sex, but… are you dating someone else?" The woman smiled at her.

"No, no, of course not, it's just, I can't now." Helena tried to move the arms around her neck.

"Why do you do this to me?" she whispered in her ear before biting her lobe, "Why do you take me and then disappear?"

"It's not that… I…" Helena gasped when the other woman rubbed her upper body against her. Damn. She wasn't wearing a bra.

"You like this?" Josie grinned.

"Josie… sorry… it's wonderful, but… I just… I have an appointment now…"

"So late?" The blonde slid her hand down Helena's shirt and took her firm breast in her fingers. The brunette gasped and opened her eyes wide. Josie smirked and kissed her roughly.

"Josie… I can't now…" Helena said breathlessly, that woman really knew how to turn her on. Before she could finish the sentence, Josie caught her lips again and pressed her thigh toward Helena's crotch. "God…"

"I can make you feel much better tonight."

The brunette trapped her lips and hugged her. She definitely liked this. Barbara came to her mind. Damn, she was waiting for her, she needed to be on time to start sweeps. Fingers opening the button of her pants sent all her rational thoughts screeching to a halt.

"I love your ears." Josie murmured, kissing her ear and pushing her against the wall. "So sexy."

Helena let herself get lost in the sensation. Josie was turning most aggressive and she loved it, her hands moved down her underwear. Dark, a street, yes, definitely exciting.

Suddenly, the young woman's senses alerted her. Her eyes snapped open. She saw a group of men at the corner of the street walking toward them. That was not good. She took the woman's head and pushed her back gently.

"Now what, dear?" Josie asked.

"We have trouble." The dark vigilante noticed three more men at the next corner.


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks for all your nice words!!! I didn't think this fic would like so much... I'm not an expert in this things. Waves to all and thanks to my fantastic editor,_ nightstalker_. -Jag-**

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Scared, Josie stepped back. Helena put her against the wall.

"Don't move," she whispered.

"Helena, no, wait."

"Stay there." The brunette walked toward the middle of the street and put her hands in her pockets.

"Are you and your friend lonely?" one of the men asked.

"No, really no, we are fine." She turned her head, the other men were behind her. "But you and your friends look lonely."

"Yes, maybe you can help us have some fun." The tallest man took her arm and grinned.

"Sure." She hit him hard on his face. Turning, she stretched her leg and kicked the man behind her. She hit another guy with her elbow and jumped easily over the other two.

She fell behind them and tapping their shoulders, she hit them in the face simultaneously using both fists. Another thug tried to hit her with a chain that he had in his hand. She ducked and grabbed the chain, pulling it, a gun fell to the ground. Another man took her free arm. Using the chain she hit his legs. Crying in pain, the man released her.

"Who's next?" she turned, grinning.

Three men were running toward her. Maybe she had opened her mouth too soon. She flipped back landing in a emergency stairway.

"That was rude." She jumped down, landing on two of them. Rolling, she crouched on the ground, preparing for her next attack. The men on the ground scrambled to their feet and ran down the street. The only one left standing turned quickly and followed them.

She stood up and wiped her hands. "Bad guys, bad fighters." She walked toward Josie who watched her, stunned. "Are you okay?"

"How did you do that?" the blonde asked in surprise.

"Practice." Helena took her hand and started to walk "Let's go. It's not a good idea to stay here."

"That was incredible," Josie said, following her, "Those jumps... no one can do that."

"I can."

"It was amazing! You flew!"

The brunette turned and kissed the blonde roughly, pushing her against the wall. She didn't want her thinking. After a few seconds long and sensual strokes, Helena moved back breathlessly. "You make me fly when I'm with you." She whispered, "Can we go now?"

"Yea… I promise you a wild night." Josie smiled.

They walked together to Josie's apartment.

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Helena hummed, resting her head on the elevator door. The "ding" announced her arrival at the Clock Tower the next afternoon. She peered out. The place seemed to be empty, Dinah was surely in and Barbara too. That was good, her mentor was certainly really pissed after her disappearance last night; she didn't want to do it, but Josie was very persuasive.

Sounds, images and feelings twirled around her mind. Josie was an excellent and wild lover, exactly what she needed. The woman was really demanding and loved having control; she didn't know how she managed to leave her tired, exhausted, but happy; she couldn't say she would forget her lovely redhead in the love making, she often fantasized she was with her and not the blonde woman.

She changed her clothes and walked into the gym. She was surprised to see the redhead exercising on the bars. The muscles of her arms were incredible. Helena watched as she lowered herself to her chair. She looked at her speechlessly; those damn pants that she wore were pasted to her legs and make her look stunning. Her t-shit was soaked with sweat and her nipples were clearly visible under the cotton. Her mouth was suddenly dry.

Damn, she wondered if Barbara knew she was hot.

Red brows drew into a frown while green eyes rose to consider the young woman with silent intensity.

Helena knew a lecture was coming.

The older woman wiped her face with a dry towel. "I see you've finally decided to grace us with your presence."

"Sorry..."

"I called you all night, we had work to do and you never answered." The redhead glared at her. "You said you'd be here at ten, we had an important mission."

"Something important happened." Helena stared at her feet.

"Something important," Barbara repeated.

"Yes."

"More important than stopping those drug dealers?" the older woman asked, wheeling toward the center of the training room.

"I said I was sorry, I was busy." Helena started to feel annoyed. She hated being lectured.

"Sure…"

"I have a private life, too."

Barbara tilted her head and studied her. She noticed a bruise on the brunette's shoulder. Clearly, it was from teeth. She felt her blood burning in her veins. "Oh, I see, rough night."

The brunette noticed where Barbara's eyes were fixed. Shit.

"Listen…"

"Your lover knows how keep your mind on bed." The redhead wheeled toward the locker where she had the sticks.

"Well… she is good." Helena mumbled. That was a truth she couldn't deny. Her eyes stopped on green. She was sure that if the redhead's eyes were knives, she would be dead now.

"Is it too much to ask for you to give me just a little respect?"

"Sorry… Look, I was coming here last night when she intercepted me outside the bar. We were talking and a group of men attacked us… She was scared and I took her home… and there… well… you know."

"No, I don't know," the older woman said, putting on her gloves.

Helena rolled her eyes.

"That woman is not good for you. Do you know anything about her? About her past? Do you know her name?"

"Barbara, I know can take of myself, okay?"

"What are your plans with this woman?"

"We don't have any plans, we're just having fun."

"Just having fun… You should at least choose better. I saw that woman. She looks older than you and her way of dressing… I can't believe it, she was almost naked. You need to choose someone better."

"She is not good enough for me? So who else? Who will it be? You?"

Barbara turned, wanting to berate her. "Don't be insolent."

"Maybe you are jealous," Helena smirked, walking toward her.

The redhead threw a stick to her that the young woman caught with her left hand.

"Smartass," Barbara growled, wheeling toward her.

"What? I'm beautiful, strong…" She leaned over the redhead. "Sexy."

A sharp pain on her knee made her grunt, she hopped backwards. The redhead had hit her hard with the stick.

"Dammit, What's wrong with you?" she said, rubbing her knee.

"What's happening to you? Now you turn irresponsible because of your night time adventures?" The redhead raised her stick and the brunette stopped it with the one in her hand.

"It's my life! I can do whatever I want with it." She turned and hit her. The sound of sticks crashing echoed in the room.

"Agree, but it doesn't means you should be irresponsible." The redhead's hands moved quickly and tried to hit Helena's legs. The brunette jumped in time and, spinning around, she swung her stick.

Barbara lifted her arm and blocked it.

She was pretty damn fast for a human. They exchanged blows with the sticks; Helena ducked several times to avoid the impact of the long piece of wood. Barbara seemed to be reading her mind. She jumped back to take a break and circled her mentor.

"Now, having a personal life is being irresponsible?" she asked, wiping the sweat from her face.

"You need to set your priorities." Barbara followed the younger woman with her gaze. How could she tell Dinah that she loved her and then sleep with someone else? She was pissed. What game was she playing?

"All right. What if I begin to give my personal life priority?"

"I'd agree. And I hope you do it with the right person."

"Well, I'm looking for that person. What's wrong with that?"

"Interesting, the places where you look… " She twirled the stick inn her fingers and swung the weapon at the brunette. "Where did you meet her?"

The young woman blocked the impact and struck back, unsuccessfully.

"Who cares?" she growled.

"I imagine not… she's certainly not an intellectual." Barbara wheeled back.

"I don't date intellectuals, it's boring."

Barbara was offended and hit the brunette. The girl twisted and attacked again with several blows and changes of rhythm with her stick, but Barbara stopped all her attempts. Finally, she put her stick against Barbara's. Their faces were inches apart.

"It will be interesting discover in who's bed you will find it." A brow arched in question.

Annoyed, Helena pushed her back, her mouth twisted into a furious sneer, eyes glittering with barely contained fury. "Don't talk to me that way, I'm not a whore! You don't know…" She bit her lip to avoid saying anything she'd regret.

"I don't know what?"

Helena knew it was best to shut her mouth. She stared into green eyes. The woman was breathing heavily, drops of sweat running between her firm breasts. The woman was gorgeous; she wanted jump on her, kiss every inch of her body, touch… take her.

She closed her eyes a few seconds. Barbara was making her crazy. She shook her head and threw the stick to the floor. How could she say 'yes, I'm fucking a girl because I can't love you and that is killing me?'

"You don't know anything," she muttered, walking toward the exit. Barbara didn't know, she would never know.

Barbara fixed her eyes on the thin figure, "Every time you want to go have fun when we're supposed to be working, remember that in our business, we don't lose money, we lose lives."

The young woman didn't say a word and disappeared behind the door.

Excellent, the brunette thought to herself, walking toward the shower, Barbara was really angry with her and she was right. She had ignored her duty, but she felt caged, her feelings toward Barbara were like a burning knife buried in her skin.

She was in hell, she sighed heavily and massaged the back of her neck, rubbing muscles turned to cement by tension.

Crap.

She closed the door of the shower..

Barbara insulted her. What the hell was she thinking? It really had pissed her off. She was a person with feelings. She was not some hormonal teenager. Barbara's problem was that she just thought in numbers, files, data. How could she be so smart, but so blind? She hit the wall with her fist in frustration.

Why couldn't Barbara see her as a woman? Why was all this so hard? Maybe she had been a real son of a bitch in another life and she was paying now for all her sins. It was so difficult to be near her without saying 'I love you', without touching her. She had tried to forget, tried not to dream of exploring her skin with touches and kisses, to lose herself in a sea of sounds, pleas and pleasure.

She rubbed her eyes with her palms.

Life had never been easy for her and it seemed it never would be.

-----------------------------------

Dinah typed at the keyboard, finishing her homework. She was saving money to buy her own laptop. Barbara had offered to help her, but she had refused. She wanted to earn it on her own. It made her feel good to help with her own expenses.

Helena had returned to sweeps, she'd had asked to go with her, but Barbara wanted her to rest another week. The tension between her sweeps partner and her guardian over the last few days had been more than evident. They argued almost everyday.

She looked through the corner of her eye. Barbara was working silently at her computer and in an obvious bad mood, she had been fighting with the brunette over the comm. As usual, Helena had disobeyed her orders, this time during a bank robbery.

The redhead pressed the enter key on her keyboard. Her eyes flicking back and forth, she scrolled through the data on the screen. Helena's attitude was really pissing her off. She was dating who-knew-what-kind-of-whore. She wanted hit her on her head to make her react.

Helena's words echoed in her mind. 'I don't date intellectuals, it's boring.'

Exhaling softly, she reached up and pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger. She reached down, slim fingers touching her unfeeling thigh just above her knee. She continued exploring slowly, pressing with her fingers. There were hints of sensation, but it was impossible to tell how much might be real and how much was just a phantom reminder of her old life.

It was amazing how something she couldn't feel could hurt so much, as much as Helena's words. 'She is not good enough for me? So who else? Who will it be? You?'

The 'ding' of the elevator alerted her to Helena's arrival.

"Can you explain to me exactly what you were trying to do?" she shouted without giving the brunette time to step out of the elevator.

"Stop a bank robbery."

"I asked you to wait."

"They would have killed the hostage!" the brunette answered, exasperated.

"You were reckless."

"I rescued her! What's wrong, Barbara? Lately, everything I do is wrong! Nothing pleases you!" She waved her hands.

"You are being reckless!" the red head glared to her.

"I'm doing my job."

"Your job is to do what I say, I'm trying to keep you alive, as well as any civilians!"

The young crime fighter shook her head and lifted both hands closing her eyes. She was tired of all these fights. "Barbara, please… Just a second, just a second."

She lowered her hands and fixed her eyes on her. The redhead saw her look was not one of disgust, but was tender, open. She relaxed a bit.

"All this is because of Josie?" Helena asked almost in a whisper, "It bothers you that I'm with her?"

Barbara clenched her jaw. She remained still, not knowing exactly how to answer.

"Why does it annoy you so much?" The young woman took a step toward her. "I'm trying Barbara, I swear to you, I'm trying…." The next words died in her mouth. How could she tell her she was trying with all her soul to forget her, to not love her, so that things could be as they were before… and it was so difficult. "I'm not a hormone driven slut that runs from bed to bed every night."

"Helena…"

"I'm not." The young woman interrupted her, "I'm sorry if you think that of me. I'm sorry if you don't trust what my mother and you taught me."

That was direct punch to her solar plexus. The redhead, now speechless, felt horribly guilty and ashamed of herself.

"I'm sorry." The brunette turned and stepped off the platform.


	20. Chapter 20

The redhead felt guilty, she had hurt her. She was being overprotective of the younger woman and had judged her harshly. After all, Helena was an adult and had her own life. She lifted her eyes and found pale blue ones looking at her.

The blonde imagined what the latest argument had been about: Helena's latest affair.

"I was an idiot right?" Barbara said, letting her eyes drop. She stared at her hands as she moved them to rest in her lap.

Dinah nodded, turning her chair toward her guardian. It was strange that Barbara would make a mistake, she always kept a cool mind and was an analytic person. But she was human and could fail. She watched her mentor pinch the bridge of her nose with her fingers.

Barbara knew she was letting her personal feelings interfere with her thinking. She was being rude and unfair with Helena, but the relationship between her protégé and that woman disgusted her. She didn't like her, there was something about her that…

"She loves you Barbara," Dinah said.

"Sleeping with an other woman?" the redhead mumbled with anger in her voice. "What kind of love is that?"

"She is trying to forget you," Dinah said softly. "She is trying… you know it. Helena has her owns ways of dealing with things, you know her, it's her way of trying to patch her hole."

"Patch her hole?" A red eyebrow lifted to the sky.

The teen blushed. "Yeah, to patch the hole she has in her heart because she knows loving you is impossible, she told me."

Barbara felt her heart sink. That was so sweet.

"You said you could never love her the same way," Dinah continued, "You always tell me you want to see her happy. Let her try to find her happiness."

The older woman shook her head slowly. Dinah was right. She had to let Helena live her own life; she needed to support her. Unrequited love wasn't pleasant. She needed to support her, at least to make things easier. She pressed the forward button and her chair advanced down the platform.

-----------------------------------

"I don't know, I'm not in the mood." Helena said into the speaker of the phone. "All, right, all right… I'll see you there in one hour."

She put the phone in its place and stared at it a few seconds. Maybe she should end the relationship with Josie, she was becoming possessive and Helena didn't like it… On the other hand, she did help distract her from thinking about Barbara. Why was it so hard to keep the older woman out of her mind? Why was it so hard not to smell her everywhere?

Crap.

She took her coat and walked toward the door of her apartment and opened it.

"Barbara?" she asked, surprised when she saw the redhead with her hand up, ready to knock on the door. What was she doing there?

"We need to talk," she said.

"I can't now… I…"

The redhead didn't listen and wheeled inside the small apartment. The brunette rolled her eyes. She wasn't in the mood for more lectures.

"Listen, Barbara, I…"

"I came here to apologize."

Blue eyes blinked "What?"

"I've been unfair to you." She played with her fingers. "I think… I'm getting old… I'm being overprotective, and you are old enough to make your own decisions." She lifted her eyes to Helena. "I'm worried about you, that's all, and I don't want to keep fighting… I don't like it."

"I don't like it either." She sat on the coach in front of her and lost herself in those marvellous emerald eyes. "I didn't want to bother you. I'm just trying to have my own life."

"I know." She felt a knot in her throat. Why was it so hard say it? "You can… bring her home whenever you want."

Barbara could see the bright gleam of interest in crystalline blue eyes.

"What?"

"Well, she's your girlfriend. You can bring her home if you want."

"She is not my girlfriend." Helena said instantly. kneeling next to the redhead.

Barbara let her gaze slide down over the younger woman's frame, she couldn't say why, but she felt a big relief inside.

"I just -- I can't explain," the brunette muttered, hoping to wave the subject aside.

"I don't care if she is your girlfriend, Helena," Barbara insisted, grabbing her hand.

"I'm telling you the truth, she is not my girlfriend. She never could be."

Barbara found herself pinned by tender blue eyes.

"I'm sorry for the other day," Helena said "I didn't mean… I admit it, I was hormonal… I'm sorry. I guess it there was a full moon or something," she joked.

Barbara laughed lightly. Helena reached down, catching one of her hands in her own, twining their fingers together.

"But I'm not a slut…" she whispered before meeting emerald eyes again. "I don't want you to think that..."

"I didn't mean to say that, I'm sorry." Green eyes closed for a long moment, and then she straightened herself, took a breath, and looked up. "Forgive me, I was just angry… forgive me. I was so stupid."

"No, you are wonderful." Helena held her hand between hers.

Barbara smiled lightly, Helena was like a damn puppy dog that always melted her. She had a sweet side that she always hid; she was afraid of being hurt as she had been after her mother's death. She appreciated that the young girl would be so open and sincere with her.

"Thanks, Helena; thanks for forgiving me."

"Always…" the young crime fighter whispered, ducking her head, her lips brushing Barbara's forehead. So close to the full red lips. She knew it would be so simple to brush them with her own, kiss softly, she could scent the delicate flesh at her temple. Warmth coupled with the faint salt of skin filled her senses, inflaming them. All she had to do was duck her head a little farther to taste the mouth that was driving her half mad with want. She could kiss and press past soft lips, explore deeply while her hands touched and caressed.

Burt that was not possible. She moved back.

Barbara marveled at the bright blue eyes glowing; it was love. No one had ever looked at her with that devotion. She felt her heart ache. She knew what Helena was feeling for her and she knew she couldn't love her back. She didn't want to hurt her, she had suffered enough. She reached out to hug her. The young woman hugged her back.

"I love you, Barbara," Helena mumbled in a barely audible voice.

The words weren't dismissed by the older woman. Her hands felt a soft vibration under her hands. Helena was purring. She felt tears running down her cheeks, Helena was so sweet; and she couldn't... she couldn't keep lying to her.

"I'm sorry…" she mumbled, sobbing, "I'm sorry, I can't…"

"Hey, easy… What's wrong?" Helena asked, disconcerted.

"I'm so sorry. Forgive me, you're wonderful."

The brunette moved back and studied that lovely face carefully, trying to read what was going on.

"Barbara, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, Helena, I love you but… I'm sorry if I can't love you more."

Helena froze, what had she just said? She felt her heart beating so fast that she though it would explode in her chest. The blood drained form her face. She stood up.

Shit.

Double shit.

"You know," she barely whispered.

Barbara looked at her. "Helena…"

"You know… who told you?" Blue eyes opened wide, frightened.

The redhead lowered her head.

"He told you?"

"No. He didn't say a word about it."

"Then how do you know?"

"Don't ask me, I just know it," Barbara whispered. She knew she had to choose her word carefully because she could hurt her young ward so easily.

Helena felt annoyed and stupid. She turned, brushing her hair back with both hands.Shit.

Shit, shit.

She knew.

"How long?" the brunette asked softly. Her hands opened and closed in balls.

"It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters!" Helena was silent for a brief moment, still angry. Barbara knew her deepest secret and she was furious. Her pupils elongated. "How long have you known?"

"Calm down."

"You should have told me." She turned her back to the redhead and began to pace.

"No, I wanted you back with us. If you knew that I knew your feelings, you never would have come back."

"Dammit." She couldn't face her, it was too much. She turned toward the door.

"Helena!" Barbara held her by her wrist, startled to see the flash of pain on that lovely face. She couldn't let her run away. "Please, don't go. Don't be ashamed of your feelings."

The dark haired head ducked. "I'm sorry, Barbara… I didn't want this. I don't know when it happened…" She lifted her hands and pressed them against her eyes. "I… didn't want to disappoint you."

"Look at me." The redhead pulled her against her, looking for her eyes. "Please look at me."

The brunette sighed, shy blue eyes were barely visible behind dark bangs. She expected rage or at least anger, but Barbara's expression was sad.

"Listen to me," Barbara said sharply, fingers gentle as she drew Helena's chin up when the girl would have looked away. "No, you haven't disappointed me… you are wonderful, sweet, gentle; anyone would be proud to be loved by you." The hand under Helena's chin trailed up, brushing loose bangs back from her forehead, the gesture tender.

Helena felt her heart ache. She wanted to run, she wanted to cry, she to disappear. The redhead's thumb brushed the young woman's temple, her touch incredibly gentle, achingly aware of the texture of soft skin and hair.

"Thanks for loving me," she whispered to her. "I don't want to hurt you. I love you so much, but I can't love you the same way you love me. Please don't go."

Barbara saw the moment's debate in expressive blue eyes.

"Promise me" she said. She didn't want Helena to leave.

Helena sighed. What else could she do? She was cornered, Barbara always cornered her. She always knew how to do it, how to leave her with no way to escape or hide. At least she hadn't pushed her away or shouted at her that she hated her, as Helena had expected. In some way, she was relieved.

The young woman sighed and nodded. The redhead pulled the dark woman against her and wrapped her arms around her.

"Thanks."

The young woman buried her nose in the soft hair. She wanted to cry, scream, run… and she couldn't. Being in love with Barbara was a curse, she could be next to her, but not touch, taste, she couldn't explore that soft, pale skin… it killed her. But killed her more to be far from that wonderful woman, her heart was bleeding a slow, painful death. She was lost.

She was lost anyway…

-----------------------------------

The older woman brushed her face against those small, but perfect breasts. She opened her mouth and kissed the soft flesh and darted her tongue out to taste it. The brunette under her closed her eyes and buried her hands in the other woman's hair, guiding her to the spots that turned her on.

The blonde rubbed her body against her, knowing the young woman loved it and moved up. Helena gasped before her lips met the other woman's. Even as her body moved, drenched in sweat and wild, she couldn't quite escape the memory of jade eyes and fiery hair, couldn't quite evade the emotions that still burned in her heart no matter what she did. In an attempt to drown that image, she kissed her partner roughly, wanting to consume her.

"Hey, easy little one…" Josie murmured, smiling.

"I want you…" Helena purred.

"Helena, tell me…" Josie bit her earlobe gently, while her fingers caressed her waist. "What else can you do?"

"Mmm?" The young woman arched under the contact.

The blonde moved her tongue inside Helena's ear and started to thrust inside her slowly. "As a meta…"

"I don't know," the young woman mumbled, lost in the sensations.

"You don't know?"

"… I don't know and I don't care…" Her hands moved along the thin body in front of her.

"You are like a wild cat."

"I am…" The brunette found the other woman's mouth and softly nipped her lower lip.

"And do you have ultra sensitive cat hearing too?"

"Yeah…. And, like cats, I love rubbing," Helena laughed lightly, rolling to be on top of the other woman.

Josie gasped at the sensation of fingers pushing deep inside her. She started to move slowly, until she found the rhythm with the small dark haired woman above her. Helena growled when the other woman's hand found her inner lips and started to move inside of her.

--------------------------------

A few hours later Helena walked down the street, she was close her apartment. Her steps echoed on the lonely sidewalk, where small drops of the recent rain had fallen. She didn't want to go anywhere after Barbara's visit, but the blonde had been insisting on seeing her and well, she couldn't sleep anyway. Barbara didn't hate her, but, at the same time, her words were clear and firm. She couldn't love her.

She would never be hers.

It hurt.

Why had she fallen in love with her, knowing that she was so damn straight? That was really the stupidest thing that she'd ever done in her entire life.

Suddenly, she heard a "woosh" sound. Before she realized what was happening, a net fell over her. She rolled and barely escaped. She put a knee on the ground. From out of nowhere ten big thugs appeared.

Crap. She had been so distracted in her thoughts that she hadn't heard them. Seemed as if she would have a bit of action that night. Exactly what she needed. An escape for all her frustration.

"Hi guys." She smirked and jumped toward the first two men in front of her.

-----------------------------------

Barbara sat in front of Delphi, but her gaze was distant, wondering what else to do. The whole thing about Helena's feeling was a confusing jumble in her head, she was well aware that her protégée used the image of superficiality to shield her most private thoughts, and knowing that the shield had broken had made her distant.

The girl was a real case of complexity, far more fascinating and enigmatic than she could have imagined. She was dark, dangerous and, at the same time, gentle and sweet..

The last month Helena had been with Dinah almost all day, avoiding being alone with. They went everywhere together, shopping, movies, they even watched TV at nights. The redhead tried to make Helena feel comfortable. Things seemed to be normal again, but she sensed Helena becoming distant.

She was disgusted by it. She hated the distance.

She raised her eyes to the upper level of the ClockTower where her two protégées were watching an awful horror movies.

Helena stared at the TV, seemingly distracted, with Dinah next to her. Her mind was in another place. She had been avoiding Josie, who'd been demanding more and more attention from her. Like the blonde, she didn't want a romantic relationship, but the sex was great and it helped distract her from thinking about Barbara.

The woman really turned her on with any movement or word. Her scent made her wild side emerge, wanting to pounce on Barbara and take her, taste her body, touch her skin, kiss those perfect lips.

She sighed and closed her eyes.

"Are you okay?" Dinah asked, looking at her.

"Yeah. 'Revolt of the Zombies'. Remind me who chose this movie, you or me?" she asked.

"You. You're the only one with such terrible taste in movies." Dinah crossed her arms.

"Well, 'The Brain That Wouldn't Die' was worse than this one."

"Next time, I'm picking the movie. This sucks." Dinah scratched her head. She knew Helena was trying to forget the redhead. Helena was not a very communicative person, the only person that knew her feelings, the only person that she trusted and opened her heart to was Barbara; and now, the link was broken. Not because her mentor had closed the door, but because Helena wanted to keep her far from her thoughts and heart.

Helena was fierce and independent, but as any wild cat, at the end of the day, she liked coming back to a home where she could feel safe and secure. She liked to be close to someone she loved and, since that was now impossible with Barbara, she was like a lost kitten, not knowing where to stay or rest.

"What are you doing?" Barbara called from downstairs.

"Trying to survive one of Helena's movies." Dinah said loudly.

"It's not so bad," the brunette shouted, "This is a low-budget potboiler from 1936 that probably seemed very cool to audiences of the time..."

"Key phrase: 'audiences of the time'."

"The story concerns the search for the secret of mind control... ostensibly to create an unstoppable zombie army... but later as a means for one character to win the woman he loves," the brunette read from the back of the DVD case. "Wanna watch it Barbara?" She looked for the DVD remote on the coffee table.

"Don't you dare start this stupid movie again," Dinah growled, using her TK to levitate the remote out of the reach of Helena's hands.

"All right you two," Barbara said "Time for sweeps."

The two women went toward the building where the alarms indicated a robbery. It was near the Dark Horse Bar. Before arriving, they separated. Dinah climbed a building next to the place while the brunette walked along the street.

The place was quiet and silent. They checked around and couldn't find a trace of anything. The alarm had come from an office which seemed to be okay at first sight. The brunette looked up, she was at the back door.

"I can't see anything. You, Dinah?"

::Clear here up.:: the teen's voice was heard. ::I'm inside.::

::Alarms are disabled. You can go inside, Huntress. Use the back door.:: Oracle said.

"Got it." The brunette kneeled and began to work on the lock.

A scream made her turn her head. A man was yelling.

"Someone is in trouble." She looked around, "Seems as if it is near here, could you hold on a minute, Dinah? Be right back."

::Yeah.::

The young woman heard another scream and ran toward an alley a few meters from where she was. She arrived a few seconds later. One man was holding another that seemed to be bleeding.

"Please help!" the man said when she saw her.

"Oracle, we need an ambulance here," the brunette said, walking toward them. Her senses were on fire, danger was near.

::On the way.::

"Someone assaulted us," the man explained. "He is bleeding…"

"Help is coming. Where did he go?" Huntress asked.

The man stood up and pointed at the end of the street. "He went that way."

Helena looked back. The man behind her lassoed her with a restraining loop around her neck and pulled. She hit the ground roughly and took her hands to her throat, trying to break the cord around her neck. The man lying on the ground moved quickly and grabbed her hands, but she used them to push him back.

::What's going on?:: Oracle asked.

She threw herself forward in a shoulder roll, launching the man behind her, that was holding the restraining loop, directly at the wall. From nowhere came another man and kicked her in the gut. She hit him back. Another man caught her left foot with a lasso and pulled her down. The brunette fell backwards, but she moved quickly. She leapt off the ground and kicked both legs out to full extension, hitting the two men in front of her. Another rope wrapped around her left arm. She pulled her arm and hit the man that was on the other side of the lasso.

"Hold her down!" a man yelled.

"Shit! She moves wildly!" other one said.

"I said, hold her down!" The man held the end of the restraining loop that encircled the brunette's neck and pulled it roughly.

She gasped. Another one caught the rope that was still tied around her arm and pulled. The young crime fighter moved her free hand toward her throat, trying to relieve the pressure around her neck. A man jumped on her, tackling her to the ground. Crap. It was hard to think without air in her lungs. She struggled, trying to free her self.

"What's going on men? She is just a girl!" a deep voice shouted.

"Damn girl! She broke my nose!"

The brunette pushed back the thug in front of her; she needed to breathe, the asphyxia was overwhelming her. Oracle was saying something to her, but she couldn't understand a word. She gasped, choking. Another rope trapped her right wrist. Two more men were over her...


	21. Chapter 21

The man holding the restrain loop increased the pressure on Huntress' neck. Her vision blurred, but she managed to hit the man next to her with her elbow, a hard blow on her head let her seeing stars. She gasped trying to take air to her lungs.

Suddenly the men over her were gone.

She heard grunts and yells of pain. She turned, Dinah was there pushing back two thugs with her TK.

::Huntress, are you all right?:: Finally, the redhead's voice was clear in her ears.

"Cough…" The brunette lowered her head, trying to recover her breath.

::Huntress.::

Dinah kneeled next to her partner, who was still coughing and removed the cord from around her neck. She'd descended the building using the emergency stairs when she heard the fight over the comm. She saw eight men over her partner. Her friend was on the ground and couldn't fight against all of them. Oracle knew it and had turned on the automatic alarms of a jewelry store on the corner knowing it would get the attention of the police and interrupt the thugs. Dinah, then, used her TK powers to throw several objects at them.

"She's okay, Oracle." She patted her partner's back. "Who were those men, Huntress?" 

"I…cough… don't know…"

"Seems as if they were looking for you."

"I'm… cough, becoming popular."

::Police are near.:: Oracle said::Move girls.::

"Yeah, I hear them. Come on, Huntress, we need to go." Dinah helped her to stand up.

-----------------------------------

"They were waiting for you," Oracle said, turning her chair toward the brunette.

"Please..." the young woman growled, rubbing her neck.

"Don't 'please' me." She lifted the restraining loop that Dinah picked up "This is not a coincidence. And you told me that someone tried to trap you with a net the other day."

The brunette sighed.

"What kind of friends do you have?" Dinah mocked, crossing her arms.

"Ha, ha, ha…"

"The attack was near the Dark Horse, too." The redhead turned and pressed a button, a big map popped up over the current window. Two red points were blinking. "One was two blocks away and the other one, four. Maybe someone is following you. The false alarm was just a trick to trap you."

"No one follows me," Helena said defensively.

"You said the same thing when Dinah came here for the first time," Barbara smirked.

"All right, all right," the brunette waved her hands, "suppose someone is following me, why?"

"That's what we need to find out, and I'm worried because we don't know if they know that you work there, but I suspect they do."

"You mean… the Dark Horse?"

"Again with the secret identity issue?" Alfred asked, walking onto the platform with a tray of tea and cookies.

"Don't start," the brunette said.

"If someone is following you, he will try to catch you again."

"I'll be ready."

Green eyes locked on her. She didn't like this. "I'll keep an eye on all the emergencies, I don't want anyone surprising us again."

"Maybe this would be useful, Miss Helena." Alfred handed her an "El Gato" WWF mask.

"This is not funny."

The butler, amused, smiled. Dinah took it in her hands and examined it.

"I think it's great."

"You have a big mouth, little bird."

"All right," Barbara said, "I'll do some research and try to figure out what we need to look for."

"Well, gotta go." Helena gave the mask to Dinah. "It's all yours."

"Where are you going?" the redhead asked.

"I have things to do." She walked toward the elevator.

"Maybe she wants to look for another mask." Dinah grinned.

"You aren't going anywhere. Come back here," Barbara said.

"Uh… sorry… I can't, really." Helena smiled lightly. "See you."

Barbara stared at her. She was still avoiding her. It hurt her. She wondered if telling her she knew her feelings had been a good idea. Whatever, too late now. She couldn't change the past.

"Helena, come back here, that bruise around your neck is pretty bad." She wheeled toward the infirmary.

"But…"

"Ten minutes..." she glared at her.

The brunette sighed and followed her, removing her coat.

The feeling of soft fingers touching her bare skin was heavenly. The brunette, her eyes closed, was lost in the moment. Barbara's touch was gentle and soft.

The older woman cleaned bruised neck of the younger woman with alcohol. She wondered how the hell Helena could be purring with that on her bare flesh.

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, concerned.

"Marvelous…" the young woman mumbled, smiling. She wanted stay there forever, with the sensation of the redhead on her, her fingers gently brushing her hair back, her long fingers caressing her skin.

"You are weird sometimes." The redhead put antiseptic on the wound. Surely it hurt like hell, but Helena didn't move and kept purring.

"I'll put a bandage just for today, you can remove it tomorrow." Taking a bandage, she put it over her neck.

"Uh uh…"

"All done," Barbara said, moving back.

"Mmm?" Helena growled in disappointment.

"It's done. See? It didn't hurt."

Dazed, Helena lifted her head and touched her neck. Shame she hadn't broken her arm. The time it'd take Barbara to care for her would be longer. She stood up and took her coat.

"Helena, I want to talk to you."

Uh. That sounded bad, really bad.

"Uh… Sure," she said, not convinced. "What's up?"

Maybe Barbara changed her mind and wanted to kick her ass; or maybe she realized Helena couldn't avoid watching her all the time or... maybe she realized that she was really sexy; well, indeed she was, she had a great body and…

"What's going on, Helena" The redhead's question brought her thoughts to a halt.

"Huh?" Blue eyes were pinned by intense green.

"I'm said what's going on?"

"Going on?"

"Helena…" Barbara pinched the bridge of her nose "We talked about this the other day. I told you I'm happy, I'm really happy that you are with us… and you… you've been acting weird…"

"Me? Please!" the brunette laughed nervously.

"You know what I'm talking about," Barbara said, gently touching her arm.

The combination of that damn touch and the look melted her. Why did Barbara have to be so sweet with her? It disabled all her defenses. Helena stared at her in silence. Now what? Tell her she just was trying to avoid feeling what she was feeling for her? That she was dying to kiss her from head to toe and to bury her nose in that perfect neck?

"Helena, I'd like for everything to be as it was before," Barbara explained softly.

No shit.

"We almost never talk."

The brunette moved her hand back. The withdrawal hurt Barbara. She looked at the young woman, who was avoiding her eyes.

"Please, what's going on? It hurts me more to see you avoiding me all the time," she said, lacing her hand with Helena's again. "I don't want you to feel bad. I want us to be friends."

"Barbara, I'm sorry." Finally, the brunette found the courage to find Barbara's eyes. The full moon made the redhead look like a vision. An angelic vision; she was so beautiful; raising her hand she cupped her cheek.

"We are friends, we will be, forever," Barbara said softly. In some way, her own words hurt like hell "You are a wonderful person and I have a lot of things to be grateful for. You rescued me. I'm who I am thanks of you."

"Why did you break up with Dick?" Helena asked abruptly. She needed to know.

After exactly thirty seconds of silence, enough time to consider her answer, Barbara spoke.

"Because he wanted another Barbara, the one that was, the one that died when Joker shot me years ago. He wanted a woman that lived alone, that didn't have more responsibility than his own. He couldn't understood that now I have Dinah, and I have you."

She smiled at her protégée and squeezed her hand. Helena was drowning in a sea of green.

"We survived many things," the redhead continued "our pain, us… he couldn't accept it. No one can make things between us change. No one."

"He's your happiness."

"No, he isn't. Sometimes things looks that way, but it was just an illusion. Not everything you see is real."

"And sometimes," the brunette added "things that you can't see are real. Thoughts, feelings..."

Barbara frowned.

"You will find some one that loves you, Barbara, and accepts you as you are."

She leaned down and kissed her check. Moving back, she found again those marvelous green irises that made her crazy.

Her thumb moved slowly, tracing the older woman's chin. Her index finger moved too and followed the contour of the redhead's lips. They were so soft, she wondered how it would feel to be caressed by them. She wondered how they would taste..

She closed her eyes and leaned in, kissing the lips softly. Her tongue darted out shyly and tasted the soft skin in front of her. The older woman moaned and opened her mouth slightly. The brunette asked for entrance with soft, slow strokes. Barbara's tongue welcome her with a light touch. She was in heaven. It gave her the courage to explore her. She deepened the caress.

"Hel?" Barbara's voice echoed in her ears.

The brunette's eyes opened slowly.

Barbara was staring at her. She was dreaming. She hadn't kissed her, all of it had been her imagination.

She looked at her hand, her fingers were still on the redhead's lips.

Shit.

She moved her hand back and turned, knowing her eyes were no longer blue.

"I'm sorry."

Barbara had seen her eyes, she knew she was aroused. "Helena, wait."

Barbara tried to stop her, but the brunette disappeared behind the elevator doors.

"Please, Helena!"

The older woman felt her heart pounding in her chest, Helena's touch had been electric, a shiver ran through her skin when she saw blue eyes morphed to glowing cat eyes caressing her; she was caught by those marvelous feral eyes.

She'd been certain that Helena would kiss her…And she would kiss her back.

But the spell had broken suddenly.

Kiss her back?

She shook her head. Christ in heaven, the hormones of her young meta ward were affecting her.

-----------------------------------

Helena resting her back on the small balcony of her apartment looking at the stars above her. She was drunk, hard to do, but she was drunk again. Second time in a month, a record. She poured herself another shot and swallowed it all at once

Barbara was still a burning pain in her heart. She was trying, quite unsuccessfully, to get the redhead out of her thoughts and heart. She brushed her hair back. She just wanted to stop thinking, stop feeling.

Josie had been calling her almost everyday, she'd been ducking her calls all week. She was not in the mood for her; luckily, she didn't know where she lived. Being in love with Barbara was like dying a slow death everyday, like being thirsty in a desert, staring an oasis that was merely a mirage. She poured another glass and lifted it to the sky.

"For you."

She swallowed it and closed her eyes.

"What are you doing?" a voice said.

Drowsy, the brunette narrowed her eyes and turned her head. She sighed and poured another glass.

"What are you doing here?" she asked Dinah, who was standing behind her.

The blonde showed her a special instrument to unlock doors. "I'm smart. Why haven't you answered our calls the last three days? Barbara is worried about you."

"She sent you here?"

"Yes."

"I was not in the mood for work."

The blonde sat next to her. She knew what her friend was feeling.

"It'sBarbara?"

Helena stared at her glass. "Yeah…"

"She doesn't hate you. She knows, and she said she wants you with us."

"I know… But it's hard to be with her every day and… well… you know. Hide my feelings from her. Restrain myself from touching her, not tell her how much I love her… Shit." She poured more liquor.

"That is not going to help you to solve things." Dinah pointed at the bottle. "And I'm sure it's not going to make you feel much better."

"Well… at least I can sleep like a log after the tenth bottle." The brunette laughed.

"Come on, Helena, stop this." The teen took the glass from her hand.

"I love her, I'm in fucking love with her…"

"You need to move on, Helena… she will never… love you back. I mean, she loves you, but not like you love her."

"I know." The young woman rubbed her eyes. She didn't want Dinah to see her crying.

"Let's get you in your bed," she patted her shoulder and stood up. "You need to start patrolling tomorrow. I have your "El Gato" mask ready.

"That is not funny."

"It is to me. Come on, up you go."


	22. Chapter 22

Barbara stared at her computer screen. She was confused, the last few weeks had been very confusing for her. Knowing about Helena's feelings for her and confronting the younger woman about it had made her analytical mind work and explore feelings and thoughts deep inside her. Feelings that she couldn't accept, they were against all her beliefs.

She always had visualized her life in a different way, being a crime fighter, later marrying, having a children, having a happy family… and yet… nothing seemed to be going as she planned. She lowered her head and looked at her legs.

She moved her hands and rubbed her thighs slowly.

The Joker had stolen an important part of her life. He changed all her dreams and goals, but not her resolution to keep going… well almost, until Helena had shown up, giving her a strong reason to not surrender.

Helena was an important… an indispensable part of her life, she corrected herself.

Indispensable.

How indispensable?

Answering that question scared her.

The elevator's doors opened and Dinah walked inside, hugging herself. The redhead rubbed her eyes and put her glasses on the desk.

"Dinah, where have you been? It's late."

"Helping a friend."

"A friend?"

The teen stood in front of her.

"Barbara, what do you feel for Helena?"

"Excuse me?" Barbara asked, surprised.

"You were just a ghost in the Tower when she was gone! When she came back your face changed, you were happy; it's impossible to miss how you change when she is near or when she is far."

"Wait a minute…"

"Jealousy has been killing you since you found out she was dating Josie. Barbara, please! Who are you trying to deceive?"

"Dinah! What are you trying to say?"

"I'm not trying to say anything, I'm trying to get you to open your eyes and see your own feelings."

"If you are insinuating that I love her, you are wrong." Barbara began to feel uncomfortable with the conversation.

"Why?" Dinah asked.

"Because I don't and… and… she is a woman!"

"Is that the whole problem? She is a woman? So what?"

"There are rules and…"

"You have uptight moral issues…" The blonde finished her sentence.

"Dinah!" the redhead almost shouted.

"Whatever, but it's a shame you close the door to happiness just to follow'rules'." The blonde shook her head and walked toward her bedroom.

"You don't understand."

The teen stopped and turned to look at her mentor.

"Yeah, and maybe you should stop and think that there was life before rules and there is life after them too."

She disappeared down the corridor, leaving the redhead lost in her thoughts.

-----------------------------------

The former Batgirl stared at the red signal on her screen. Helena's movements. Her young protégée had a rough night. A building in one of the poor areas of New Gotham was on fire. The young crime fighter had helped people that were trapped on the top floors.

She'd disappeared for three days, as she always did when she was sad. She sent Dinah to look for the brunette. Knowing some one was hunting her, it was best to be sure she was all right. She couldn't sleep last night, staring at the blank ceiling of her room.

She couldn't get the image of the brunette out of her mind. She was really happy when she was close. She wondered if there was any way to have things back as they were a few months ago. It was stressful to know what her protégée was feeling for her…

How would it feel to love another woman? How would it feel to love Helena? Sometimes the question died in her mouth. She didn't want to hurt Helena more, but she still wanted to ask her:

How does it feel?

::I told Barbara it would be dangerous to send you there after your hangover.:: Dinah said, smirking.

Barbara blinked and turned her mind back to her computer.

::Why?.:: Huntress asked.

::You have still enough alcohol in your body to make the building explode.::

::Ha, ha.::

"Are you finished? No more people inside?" Oracle asked.

::Yes, I'm coming back home. Is there any pizza?::

"No, but I'll order one." Barbara smiled, she was a big kid. The image of Helena's tender look last night appeared in front of her eyes. Her eyes were feral, but it was still full of love; she'd never seen any one look at her that way, so open, full of hope.

It was like the look she had months after Selina's death. One night Barbara found her crying alone in her room. She wheeled inside and stopped next to her bed. She'd talked to her with a soft voice and, suddenly, Helena jumped on her and wrapped her arms around her with force, the girl was desperate, devastated after her mother's death.

She hugged her back, and after long minutes of smoothing her hair, the brunette finally lifted her eyes. It was the same look she had seen in her a few weeks ago.

Love.

After that heartbreaking look, Helena had embraced her, sweetly, softly, holding her tightly, as if she didn't want to let her go, but keep her there forever. It made her nervous. Her dear protégée was looking at her as a woman, not as a friend. She didn't deserve that love and devotion because she couldn't love her back in the same way.

Helena was a woman, and so was she.

The sound of the elevator doors opening pulled her from her thoughts. The young, dark woman stepped out of the elevator wearing just her black pants and her t-shirt. She was covered in dust and ashes.

"Where is your coat?" she asked, surprised.

"Missing in action," Helena grumbled.

"We need to buy fire proof coats," Dinah said, noticing she was burned. "Are you okay?"

"I think so… Just a bit tired."

Barbara did a quick visual analysis of her protégée. The skin on her face, arms, shoulder and chest was red. "You're burned…"

Helena looked at her arms. "Not exactly… Looks like I went to the beach," the brunette joked.

The redhead wheeled toward her and examined her closely. "Go take a shower, I'll put some cream on your skin so it won't hurt tomorrow."

"I'll need do expense this, all my clothes are destroyed"

"No way, I told you not to wear expensive clothes on duty. Go shower."

"But I look cool."

"Go." Barbara smiled.

The redhead waited for her protégée in the living area. She knew the TV was a good weapon to keep Helena still. The brunette sat on the couch in a t-shirt and shorts. Barbara transferred herself to the couch and Helena sat her in front of her while she put some antiseptic and cream on her burned skin.

Barbara was grateful that her protégée was okay, she would heal quickly, but it was best to take care of her and not leave everything to nature and her meta cells. She found herself getting lost in the sensation of the firm, soft skin under her fingers, Helena was firm but delicate at the same time, she really had a great back.

The feeling of Barbara's hands was wonderful, as always. Helena loved it when her mentor touched her. When the older woman finished with the front on her body, she laid face down over the redhead's lap, closing her eyes.

Shit.

Barbara's scent was stronger there. She felt heat running through her veins at high speed, arousing her in a second.

She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to calm her instincts.

The older woman lifted her shirt up and applied cream on her back with circling movements. Slowly, her fingers massaged her spine.

Helena bit her lips. Barbara was so not helping her control her emotions. The scent of her mentor scent was unique, tempting, and her brain hadn't missed it, sending signals to her whole body. Her sex was throbbing. Maybe all this was a bad idea.

Barbara noticed her young partner's breathing speed up; the brunette rocked her hips forward suddenly and then remained still. The lithe body was tense under her fingers.

"Helena, sorry… Did I hurt you?" she asked softly.

Fuck! She definitely wasn't helping with that melting voice. She could pounce on the redhead at any moment and seduce her.

"I think I need to go home." The brunette sat up abruptly.

"Why don't you stay? You look exhausted, after your hangover from yesterday and the extra work today; I bet you are wiped out."

"Thanks, I am, but I don't want to bother you." Helena swallowed, thinking that a good cold shower would be useful right now.

"You never bother me." The redhead's voice was warm. She examined her protégée, who paced nervously in front of her. Something was wrong.

"Hel?"

The young woman closed her eyes, fisting her hands. She took a deep breath before turning slowly toward the redhead and asking, almost in a whisper, "Look at me, Barbara…. What do you see?"

The redhead was suddenly pinned by an intense and predatory gaze. They were face to face, Helena's hands resting on the arm of the couch.

The brunette wanted to take the older woman, without asking, lose herself in that magnificent body touching, tasting. Her scent was everywhere; it was like a powerful drug that enflamed her senses. Her eyes morphed to an aroused gold.

"Tell me, I want to know." She lowered her face. "Do you see a kid? A stubborn crime fighter? Or maybe you see something you don't want to see?"

"I don't… want to see?" Barbara swallowed.

Helena's answer, whispered in her ear, made her shiver.

"A woman."

The brunette moved back, closing her eyes, trying to control her self. What the hell was she doing? Barbara would never love her, she couldn't tell her. She stood up, feeling her heart breaking again, she couldn't dream of her, she didn't have the right to do it. She didn't deserve it.

"As you said, I need to rest," she said, stepping back.

"Helena, look at me," Barbara said.

"I gotta go."

"Helena, look at me."

The brunette turned, she was not in the mood to deal with this. The redhead trapped her wrist and pulled her roughly toward her. Helena put her hand on the arms of the chair to stop herself from falling to the floor. The redhead kept tightened the grip on her wrist.

"I said look at me!"

Helena took two deep breaths. Her tension was evident in the muscles of her arms.

"Please." Barbara said softly.

The dark head lifted slowly. Under rebellious bangs, she could she golden eyes still glowing, regarding her. Helena was aroused. She couldn't hide her desire for her.

She gasped, feeling her cheeks invaded by a warm blush. She was hypnotized by feral pupils; it was like be under a magic spell that hit directly at her core. Shit… she loved that woman.

Wait s second.

What had she just thought?

She was in love with her? But Helena was a woman…

Helena read the confusion in the redhead's eyes and, ashamed, turned her head.

"Fuck, I'm sorry," she growled.

"Helena…" Barbara tried to organize her thoughts and feelings. And it was pretty confusing because her brain was indicating one way and her heart was beating faster, urging her to go another way.

Her young ward turned, annoyed. "What part don't you fucking understand?" she shouted in frustration. "I'm in love with you! I want you! Every time you touch me I lose control! Your smell arouses me! Your voice, your fucking voice, turns me on! I just want to jump on you and take you!"

Barbara listened in astonishment.

"I'm just trying to keep my distance so I don't hurt you and … and…" Helena balled her fists, "and stop feeling what I'm feeling for you."

She moved toward the elevator without saying a word. Barbara watced her go, confused.

She felt her heart break. She lowered her head and closed her eyes. A tear escaped her eye.

Why was it so hard?

Why was it so hard to accept that she was in love with her.

She loved her. She had been trying to deny it, but she couldn't anymore.

She was in love with Helena.

-----------------------------------


	23. Chapter 23

They finished a nice dinner listening to music. Helena drank a glass of wine as she looked through the window of Josie's apartment. What the hell was she doing here? Every day it was more difficult to be near Josie. Her feelings toward the redhead were getting stronger instead of diminishing. It pissed her off.

Everything was useless, she had tried everything. Nothing worked. The redhead was in her skin, in her veins, in her blood. She closed her eyes and she could see her. Barbara followed her everywhere, even in her dreams. She'd never felt this before, she had dated so many people, the last serious one was Reese, she'd been attracted because he hadn't fallen under her charm easily, he loved to challenge her, and he had said no.

No one told her no.

It had been an exciting game.

But when she'd managed to catch him, she lost interest.

Helena stared at the liquid inside her glass. She was usually the one that chose with whom she'd go out, sleep or break up. She was the hunter… and she was hunted… and the person had hunted her hadn't realized it.

Barbara knew her like no one else, her fears, hopes… She couldn't live without her, and she preferred being close to not seeing her anymore. She needed time, time to organize all the confusion in her mind. She had been trying to escape and it didn't help. Things had gone too far with Josie. She needed to end it. She was not in the mood to be with her or any other woman. She couldn't have a relationship if she didn't mend her heart first.

She felt a soft kiss on her neck.

"Mmmm… you look so sexy tonight." Josie wrapped her arms around her. The blonde noticed her skin was red. "What happened to you?"

"Sun burn?" Helena asked innocently.

"In November?"

"Happens." She shrugged her shoulders and cocked her head.

"Did you go to a tanning bed?"

Helena laughed lightly. "Of course not."

Josie went toward her stereo and changed the CD in it.

"Josie, I need to talk to you."

"Later, I want to dance with you. It's been really difficult to catch you lately… like you're avoiding me."

The brunette sighed. This would be a bit difficult. Josie put a CD inside and pressed the play button. Soft, romantic music started to play. She wrapped her arms around the brunette's neck again, without releasing the remote control in her hand. She pressed her body against her and kissed her chin.

"Do you like to be difficult?"

"It's not that…"

"Shhh… don't talk." She pressed her lips against her.

The blonde pressed a button in the remote control in her hand. The volume of the music increased.

"Shit!" Helena felt a sharp sound in her ear, she moved back.

"Helena?"

The young woman winced a bit. "Can you turn down the volume?"

"What's going on?" the woman asked, doing as Helena requested.

"We need another CD. This one has a strange noise," the brunette explained, rubbing her left ear.

"Oh… I didn't hear anything…"

"Well… remember the sensitive hearing? Must be that…"

"Oh, I see…" Josie smiled and kissing the brunette's lips, hugging her, "Well, we can forget the dance and go straight to dessert."

Uncomfortable, Helena gently removed the hands around her waist, she took them in her own and kissed Josie's fingers. She'd gone too far with this. She was in love with another woman: she couldn't continue this adventure.

"I don't want to be rude… but I'm not in the mood for this now."

The older woman smiled at her. "Come on, little one, I want you." She punctuated the last words, moving her hands toward the waist band of Helena's pants.

"I'm sorry, Jos. I can't…"

The blonde pushed her against the wall and kissed her. "I want you now." She tried to unbutton her pants, but the brunette trapped her wrist.

"No, Josie… wait."

"What's wrong?" Josie frowned.

"Sorry, Josie. I can't keep doing this." Helena pushed her back and walked to the center of the room, running a hand through her hair.

"What?" The tall blonde blinked.

"We talked about this when we started," she said. "We agreed that this…. this was just for fun, nothing serious."

"I remember, and…?" Josie crossed her arms.

"I can't keep going…."

There was a deep silence.

"I'm sorry." Helena sighed and lowered her head, "I don't want to hurt you. You are marvelous. It's me..."

"So you want say goodbye?" the blonde asked, walking toward her.

"I don't want to lie to you." Helena explained. "I can't keep doing this."

::Helena? Are you there?:: The brunette heard Barbara's voice in her ear. She had disconnected her mic, but not the speakers, always keeping in mind that Barbara might need her for an emergency. Must be something urgent because she had been at the Clock Tower a couple of hours before. She turned her back to the blonde, looking through the window. She turned on her mic.

"A second, Oracle…"

The brunette turned around and found the blonde pointing at her with the remote control. The brunette frowned.

"I can't let you go." The blonde lifted her brow, "You see… I sold you."

"What?"

"The Huntress has a big bounty on her head in the market."

"Huntress?"

"I know who you are. We've been looking for you for months. We heard about the mysterious dark woman that's screwed so many people's plans. We just had a blurry description of you… So I started a search, looking for women with your description. I was so lucky when I found you in that bar. I wasn't sure you were who I was looking for, but… I proved it."

"Josie, are you okay?"

"You have all the characteristics of the Huntress. I tested you…"

"What?"

"You can't lie to me. You are meta, your eyes are like cat pupils, as many people have told us, and you fight incredibly."

Helena bit the inside of her cheek and shook her head. Great. She took a deep breath before looking at the woman. "The attack in the alley with you was a trap?"

::Helena?:: Oracle asked, she could hear the conversation ::Where are you?::

"Exactly, the way you attacked wasn't coincidence. It fit perfectly with our reports. We taped you." The woman stepped back.

The brunette followed her with her gaze.

"I tried to trap you before, but my stupid men failed… twice. It confirmed that you are the Huntress and I knew I'd have to do it by myself."

::What's going on? Who is with you?:: Oracle asked.

"Who are you?"

"I'm part of big organization that has spent thousands of dollars tracking you."

"Now I feel important." Helena grinned. "A whole organization created just to hunt me?"

"Yes."

"It's like a fan club, but with criminals, no?" Helena cocked her head, analyzing the situation. The woman had that thing in her hands, pointing at her. What was it? "And now that you have me, what are you doing to do?"

"Well, pack you. I have to deliver you to my buyer," Josie explained, waving her hands.

::Careful, Huntress.:: Oracle said.

"I was thinking of having a little goodbye party with you. But you screwed up my plans. Do you know that you are a fantastic lover? You really how to do it."

Helena sighed, "Good money?"

"Very good money. It's incredible how much people will pay for you. You are coming with me."

"Josie, you are insane. I'm not going anywhere." Helena stepped toward her.

"Oh, I think you will... Huntress." The blonde smiled, pressing a button on the control in her hands.

It shot a powerful ultrasonic sound that hit the brunette's sensitive hearing. Helena felt the powerful wave and cried out, covering her ears.

-----------------------------------

The scream make Barbara's shiver. Helena never complained. She was capable of enduring so much pain. What happened?. She hadn't heard a fight, she'd just cried out suddenly. Something was terribly wrong. Listening carefully to the silence on the other end of the radio signal, she was concerned.

"Huntress?" She wheeled her chair toward another computer and opened a screen that allowed her to search and find Helena's location. "Huntress, do you copy? I'm not receiving you."

Helena was in love with her, and… she knew she shared her feelings, but her issues had stopped her, she had been trying to deny it, to convince her it was wrong… she loved her too. The brunette had been suffering the few last months, and she had been looking for a way to escape the pain inside her heart… with another woman, an unknown woman.

She had mentioned Josie's name.

That bitch. Her instinct was right, it never failed. She was a criminal looking for her friend. She was right… and she had pushed Helena into her arms.

The brunette's signal com appeared on the east side of the city, but there was interference. She searched for the source of it.

-----------------------------------

Feeling like a drill was burying into her head, Huntress sank to her knees and curled up, growling. She squeezed her eyes shut and gritted her teeth; it was impossible to think, the pain overwhelmed her.

"It's not a remote control, it's an ultrasonic weapon, dear," Josie explained, walking toward her "Did you know that there's sound energy with a frequency, or pitch, that's too high to be heard by the human ear? Evolution bestowed cats, bats and dolphins with the ability to hear high-frequency sound waves. You are a little cat, no? When I was testing you, I tried to find your weakness… it was easy… you told me."

Josie removed her finger from the button.

The sound stopped.

Shit. That had really hurt. The young woman felt a great relief and rested her forehead on the floor. The blonde was talking seriously, and she'd been a fucking idiot, again, letting some one know her weakness.

"You try that again…" Helena mumbled, glaring at her "…and I'll kill you slowly."

"I don't think so. I studied the different ways in which ultrasonic sound affects the human body." Josie explained, circling her "As ultrasonic sound pitches, or cycles per second, decrease, deadly effects on the body increase. Your characteristics are interesting. I adjusted my system to your sensitive hearing and it hits directly at your brain."

The brunette moved, trying to attack, but before she could jump at the older woman, she pressed the button on the remote again. Helena cried and covered her ears with her hands again, falling on her knees.

Fuck!

She needed to get that remote.

-----------------------------------

The signal had a lot of interference. Oracle could barely hear the woman's explanation, but the word 'sound' gave her a good idea as to what was happening. She couldn't detect any sound, but she knew that Huntress could hear frequencies that normal humans could not; she turned and checked her protégées receivers.

She opened another window.

Bingo.

She found the sound, it was a very low frequency level. The graphic on the screen showed it was at a dangerous levels for the brunette. She knew that when intense sound waves were combined with excessive low-frequency vibrations, the effect was tremendously painful to humans. In Huntress' case, it would be worse.

"If you can hear me, get out of there!" she shouted in the mic. "Huntress!" She opened an alternative mic, her other protégé was in her bedroom and the dark woman needed back up. "Dinah, Huntress is in trouble, hurry!"

-----------------------------------

Josie crossed her arms and released the button. She took her cell phone and dialed a number.

Huntress moved restlessly on the floor, moaning. That fucking sound was breaking her ear drums. She needed to find a way to escape. Oracle was saying something to her, but she couldn't understand well, the sound stunned her.

"I got her, hurry," Josie said, watching the brunette.

The brunette tried to attack, but Josie saw it and hit her with another low frequency wave. Helena hit the ground crying, trying unsuccessfully to block the sound with her palms over her ears.

"Bad movement, honey, you are mine." Josie sighed.

-----------------------------------

Barbara picked up her laptop, after worriedly checking Huntress' vitals. She knew some sound levels could produce a heart attack, and her protégés was having an irregular heart beat. She put her comms on and moved toward the elevator, followed by Dinah.

"Huntress, can you hear me? Hold on, we are on our way!" she said, pressing the elevator button to the basement.

-----------------------------------

"Hurts, little one?"

Josie sat on her couch, crossing her legs, observing the brunette. Helena was curled up in a tight ball, trying unsuccessfully to cover her ears and block the painfully sharp sound. The sound completely defeated her. Her eyes fluttered open and her body shook uncontrollably.

"Sometimes it's a disadvantage to have meta-abilities, no? Thirty more seconds and I'll fry your brains out. It would be a good lesson for you."

-----------------------------------

"Stop it, stop it, dammit! You are going to kill her!" Oracle clenched her teeth as she monitored Huntress' vitals. They were altered in a dangerous way. She was afraid she would have a heart attack. She gave the laptop to Dinah and moved the Hummer out of the garage at high speed, toward the location of her friend.

"It's my fault, it's my fault…" the redhead mumbled to herself, praying she would arrive in time. She needed her; she needed to tell her that she loved her, she needed her. She couldn't imagine her life without the dark woman…

And she'd never would forgive herself if something happened to her.

-----------------------------------

Josie released the button of the remote control again. She knew the young woman was barely conscious, stunned by the sharp wave of sound. She kneeled next to her.

"Helena, dear? How do you feel?" She brushed the damp hairs on her forehead back. "Like your head is going to blow off?... Probably, but don't worry, I need you alive, you are not going to die tonight."

Huntress heard a buzz still echoing in her ears; she tried to move, but she couldn't coordinate her movements. They were erratic and weak. She wanted to kill that woman.

She would do it.

She growled in annotance when she felt Josie touching her.

"Ohh… poor Helena…" The blonde smiled and moved her finger over the delicate lines of the young woman's face, as she tried to keep her eyes open.

"You are so beautiful."

Josie leaned down and traced the contour of Helena's lips slowly with her tongue.

"And soft… I love when you touch me... when I feel you inside me…"

Huntress tried to move away, but her body didn't respond. She wanted to kick the other woman's ass. Josie pressed her mouth against her. The blonde then moved back, licking her lips.

"You taste as wonderful as always. It's a shame it's all over." Josie said, smiling. "I need to take my precautions. Listen to me, my little cat. I need to keep my merchandise safe. I can't have any risks, so, I'm going to program the sound to emit at a lower level, not as painful as the one I used earlier, but enough to keep you stunned and quiet. I'll apply a 73 cycles per second (Hz) – That will cause a lack of visual acuity, a feeling of distortion or spatial orientation; you will have \ poor muscular coordination and loss of equilibrium, slurred speech and blackout." she pause and shrugged. "Not that you can even understand what I'm saying to you right now..."

The blonde adjusted her remote control and turned on a switch.

A sharp sound hit the young crime fighter's sensitive ears; she arched her head back, growling. This one was not as strong as the other, but it was annoying, terribly annoying. It was impossible to think straight.

Josie's men opened the door. The tall woman took the brunette's chin in her fingers and kissed her again.

"Three million dollars, Helena. I hope you'll forgive me." She stood up and walked toward the exit. "Let's go. We need to move."

The men stood over the brunette, who tried to fight them, unsuccessfully. They pushed her against the ground and cuffed her hands behind her back. They cuffed her feet and dragged her out of the room.

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	24. Chapter 24

When the brunette opened her eyes again she was in another place. Maybe she had been unconscious because she didn't remember how she had arrived there. Where had they taken her? Her vision was blurred and she couldn't move. It seemed she was inside a big hangar.

Where was she?

After long minutes, she realized she was in a cage. Her head hurt like hell. She tried to organize her thoughts unsuccessfully, the annoying sound didn't allow her to think straight; her hands and feet were cuffed. She looked up. Josie was there, smiling.

"Hi dear, ready to travel?" She kneeled next to her.

"Stop it…" Helena felt her mouth stick. "Please…stop the sound".

"Sorry, I can't, little one." She looked at the remote in her hand. "So, don't worry, you will be okay."

The brunette clenched her teeth and rested her forehead on the floor of the cage. She wanted the sound to stop."Turn… it off." she growled.

"The plane is ready," one of the men said.

"Well, your plane is ready." Josie smiled. "The money is in my account. Now I think it's time to say goodbye, little one."

The young woman closed her eyes and bit her lips. Fuck! Damn sound. She felt the other woman lifting her head before darkness enveloped her.

"You are a fantastic lover," Josie mumbled, kissing her again. "I'll miss you, little one." She moved out of the cage and locked the door. "Let's go."

Four men pushed the heavy metal cage inside a big wooden one.

"Hurry. I don't want trouble," the woman ordered the other man.

"We paid the inspectors not to check the merchandise on the plane," he said while the other henchmen moved the heavy wooden box inside the plane.

"Excellent." She gave him the small device. "Keep this close to her, if you don't want her to escape and break your neck."

"Yes, ma'am."

-----------------------------------

Barbara sped through the city. The signal had stopped at the airport. She blamed herself. She had rejected the young woman and she had fallen into that bitch's trap. She owed this to Helena. She needed to let her know that she loved her. The Hummer almost flew over the streets. She had heard part of the conversation, they were planning to send her young ward to an unknown place and she needed to stop them in time.

"We're here," Dinah announced, looking at the fence that bordered the airport. "Her signal is on the other side, where the private planes are."

"Got it." Oracle crashed the Hummer through the fence.

"What are you doing?" Dinah shouted.

"Taking a shortcut."

The Hummer jumped over the irregular ground several times until it landed on the runway. The redhead pressed the accelerator. Dinah looked at the screen. She lifted her head and pointed in front.

"There, the hangar on the left." The blonde opened her eyes wide when she saw a small plane wheeling toward them. "Look out!"

Oracle turned the vehicle to the left without slowing her speed. She saw the tall blonde and three men opening the door of a dark car. She drove directly toward them.

"Oracle, careful!" Dinah yelled.

"Brace your self."

The thugs tried to escape, but the former Batgirl crashed her Hummer into their vehicle.

"Shit!" Dinah growled.

The redhead jumped out of the car and hit a man with her escrima stick. She had taken the precaution of wearing her the transponder. Dinah pushed two of the guys back with her TK power. Oracle identified Josie immediately, even though she'd seen her just once-- that night in the bar, but she would never forget that face.

Josie ran, trying to escape, and Barbara followed her. She threw one of her batarangs at the woman's feet, making her fall. She jumped on her and, rolling her over, she slapped the woman's face with anger.

She had used Helena.

No one screwed with her.

Josie pushed her back with her feet and stood up. The ex-Batgirl had more experience and pushed the blonde against the wall with her stick across her throat.

She wanted to kill that woman.

"Where is Helena?" she growled, her face inches from her.

"What?" Josie coughed, feeling the stick pressing against her throat.

The redhead's answer was a hard hit with her elbow to the woman's ribs.

"Where is Helena?" Oracle shouted.

"I don't know." The blonde coughed.

"Oracle!" Dinah interrupted.

"What?"

"Huntress is not here, " The blonde showed her the brunette's necklace. "They removed it. I found it inside the car."

"Damn." Barbara punched the woman's face. The tall woman slipped to the ground. She put the stick against her throat once more, pressing it with both hands.

"Oracle, no!" Dinah yelled.

"Get back!" She continued to press her stick against the woman's neck. "You don't want to see me pissed, got it, Josie? Or whatever your name is., right? I'll snap your neck right here if you don't tell me where she is…"

"On the plane, she just left on the plane." The woman moved her eyes to her right.

Oracle turned her head to look at the plane that they had almost crashed into on the runway.

"Shit." She turned her head to the other side.

The airplane had gone.

"No…" Feeling her heart sink, she clenched her teeth in despair. She had lost her.

She had failed her.The anguish disappeared, turning into anger. She pressed the stick harder against the woman's throat. Josie coughed, trying to breathe. Dinah, frightened, touched her mentor's shoulder.

"Oracle, no…"

"Where are you sending her?" the redhead growled at Josie.

"I don't know…" the woman coughed.

The redhead pushed impossibly harder against the woman's neck, knowing exactly how far she could go.Josie put her hands over Barbara's trying, unsuccessfully, to relieve the pressure, but Barbara's anger made her stronger. Josie had been sleeping with her Helena.

Sleeping.

Touching her.

She had been taking advantage of her feelings.

She used her.

"Listen to me," she said, trying to control herself, "I don't care if I break your neck. So, I'm going to ask you again. Where is the plane taking her? Who paid for her?"

Josie coughed, "I don't know… My orders were just to bring her here. The plane is private."

"Who paid you?"

Oracle hit the woman on her head with her stick making her bleed. She moved quickly and lifted her by her neck. Josie cried in pain and struggled, trying to free herself but Barbara maintained her grip, ignoring the burning sensation in her back.

"No, Oracle!" Dinah yelled, scared. The redhead could break her neck so easily.

"Move back, Dinah! Josie, I'm going to count until three, got it? Just three. I'll break your neck if you don't talk to me. One…"

Josie sobbed and tried to escape unsuccessfully.

"Two…" Oracle said with a firm voice.

"Al Hawke! Al Hawke!" the blonde yelled, "Please!"

Dinah opened her eyes wide and looked in concern at the redhead. "Hawke?"

The redhead hit the woman's head against the wall. Josie slipped unconsciously to the ground.

"Let's go, Dinah." Oracle said, running toward the Hummer.

"Where are we going?"

"I'll need to hack the airport database and try to find the flight plan of that plane. You drive now."She needed to find her, she couldn't lose her. She would never forgive herself if something happened to her. Hawke surely wanted to kill her, as he had done with Dinah's mother. He knew she was dangerous and he would try to make her disappear.

He loved to watch his victims die in front of him. It gave her a bit more time to try to find the brunette. She climbed into the passengers seat and opened her laptop.

"To Wayne Manor, Dinah."

"Wayne Manor?"

"We need a plane. Call Alfred, he is staying there tonight."

-----------------------------------

A few hour later in a distant place a four men moved inside an empty hangar a heavy wooden box that had just descended from the airplane.

"Where is the truck?" a man asked, opening the big wooden box.

"Careful with that!" another one said.

"It'll be here in a few minutes." A third man appeared.

"Help here, this is heavy," the first one called, trying to get the cage out.

They dragged the metal cage out of the wooden box and put it on the ground. A dark haired woman was curled up on the bottom of the cage, unconscious. One of the men circled it and kneeled to examined her.

"Well, well, what is this?" The leader kneeled next to the cage and looked inside. She was a stunningly beautiful girl. He knew he was going to pick up someone that had been fucking with his boss' plans. After months of searching and a lot of money he got… her. He'd assumed it would be a man.

"A woman? This is crazy," one said.

"She is lovely," he noted, smiling.

"But dangerous," another said, giving him the remote control. "Keep this near her. The boss said that."

"What is it?"

"I don't know, I just know it keeps her still."

"Maybe we can have a bit of fun here." The man grinned, putting the remote in his pocket.

"Are you crazy? Hawke wants her."

"Yes, he wants to kill her, so, it couldn't make a big difference." He went toward the cage's door and removed his jacket. "And she's cuffed."

"What are you doing?"

"Come on, it won't take us too much time." He took his keys and opened the door.

Huntress opened her eyes slowly. Disoriented, she tried to recognize where was she. The sound that was still blasting her ears had her totally dazed. How many hours she had been knocked out?

She was still inside the cage… but where was she?A shadow was over her. She felt hands under her armpits. Someone was dragging her out of the cage. She knew she needed to fight. She tried to struggle, but her body was disconnected from her brain.Whoever it was, let her fall on the floor. It was cold.She felt hands on her legs. Someone was uncuffing her ankles.

Who was it?

Someone was on her. Lips were on her neck and a hand cupped her breast.

Fuck! Just what she needed. She struggled weakly and moved her head to the side. That was disgusting.

"Easy, beautiful…" the man said, searching for her lips.

She didn't know how, but she kicked the man hard with her knee in his crotch.

The man yelled.

She rolled and tried to stand up to escape. It didn't help that her hands were still cuffed behind her back.

Crap. She couldn't move.

"Hold the bitch!" a man yelled.

"I told you!" the other one said.

In a moment, she was pinned down by strong arms. She hit with her head a man and struggled as she felt a hard kick to her ribs. Another blow took off the air from her lungs. She whimpered as the butt of a rifle struck her in the head.

"Stay quiet, bitch!" He glared at the man holding his crotch. "I told you not to touch her!"

Annoyed, he pushed him back; he walked toward the brunette and slapped her face. He put her back against the ground and opened the zipper of her short jacket.

"You will like this, honey." He grinned, opening his pants.

Stunned, the young woman moaned, the buzz in her ears was terribly annoying and the blow to her head had left her seeing stars. She distantly felt him unbuckling her belt. She wanted to fight… but she couldn't.

Barbara.

The redhead's smile came to her mind. Her look behind her glasses. She always thought it was damn sexy.

His hands unbuttoned her pants and rubbing her waist he leaned to kiss her.


	25. Chapter 25

"No…" Huntress struggled weakly. He was touching her.

"Easy…" He kissed her neck again and lowered the zipper of her pants.

"No..." she tried to move but she was totally stunned and he had a hard grip on her with the help of his henchmen.

Suddenly, the man yelled and then there was commtion. Gun fire echoed in the place.

A bat-a-rang had hit the man's head. Barbara had seen him trying to undress the brunette and anger consumed her. Her shot had been exact. The other men, surprised, didn't have time to think, they were pushed back by a strong force. One of the men fired at the redhead.

Dinah protected her mentor, who found the place where the plane taking her friend had landed, thanks to the incredible computer system on the batplane. The damn thing was scary fast, and she wondered how Barbara, a calm, rational person could pilot so crazy. That had been the most amazing thing she'd ever seen. It was totally silent and landed like a helicopter.

Oracle, with her escrima sticks, smashed the wrists of the man holding the rifle. The sound of bones breaking filled the place. She hit the man on his face and he fell, knocked out.

"Fuck!" The man on the floor, who had been hit in his head by the batarang, took his hand to his head. He was bleeding. Surprised, he saw two women easily defeating his men. If he lost the girl, Hawke would kill him.

The brunette was moving restlessly on the floor, trying unsuccessfully to protect her ears from the sound with her shoulders. He ran toward her and put his arm around her neck lifting her. He took out the remote device in his pocket.

"Stop!" he shouted to the women.

Oracle was holding a man by his neck. She released him and he sank, unconscious, to the floor. Dinah turned.

"Let her go." The redhead glared at him.

"No, I'll kill her!" he shouted. "Do you know what this is?" He raised the remote device, "This will kill her. Do you understand? Kill her. Get out of here!!"

The redhead walked toward him with firm steps. "Let her go."

"No! Don't take another step or I'll kill her!"

He thumbed up the volume of the device and the brunette growled, arching her back.

"No!" Oracle stopped, lifting her hand.

"Get out! I'll kill her, I just have to move this button up and it'll fry her brain!"

"All right! All right! Turn it off!!" the older woman said, stepping back. Whatever he had in his hand was hurting her Helena. "Just stop it!"

She balled her fists when she noticed he had his pants open. The brunette hung limply by her neck in the man's arms. He had tried to… son of a bitch.

"Get out!" he yelled pressing the button again.

The brunette cried out loudly. The sharp sound increased suddenly, hitting her sensitive eardrums.

Barbara felt her heart break when she saw the pain reflected in the brunette's face. That was enough. She'd had enough.

"Dinah…" She knew she just had to say it.

The small remote control flew through the air and crashed against the ground. Dinah's powers were growing. She was on the man in two steps. She slammed her fist into his face and he released the young woman. Dinah ran toward the small remote control and stepped on it, breaking it.

The sound stopped. Huntress groaned with relief and rested her forehead on the ground, breathing heavily. She never thought she could feel that kind of pain. The fucking sound was gone, but a soft buzz still echoed in her injured ears. She was certain that unconsciousness would envelope her at any moment.

Blinded with anger, Oracle punched the man in his head.

Two…

Three…

He fell backwards with her over him.

He had hurt Huntress and he had tried to take advantage of her when she was defenseless. She hit him harder. Only Dinah's shouting brought her back to reality. She turned her head still seething in anger, her fists still ready to attack.

Dinah was with the brunette; the teen had uncuffed her hands and had her head in her lap. "Oracle, we need to help her," she said, trying to get the redhead's attention. She had never seen her mentor so angry.

Helena knew Dinah was with her, but she couldn't open her eyes, they were so heavy, as were her limbs. She was a good kid, a good friend. She promised herself she wouldn't annoy the teen anymore… well, at least for the next two weeks.

A familiar scent suddenly surrounded her, as did the sensation of arms wrapping around her in a protective embrace.

Barbara.

Barbara was there.

Barbara was talking to her, she was saying something to her. Hard to know what it was. A hand touched her chin.

The brunette barely could open her eyes. She found green eyes regarding her; she tried to say her name, but she couldn't, her eyes refused to stay open and she closed them; she relaxed and rested her head on her shoulder. Soft hair caressed her cheek.

Barbara was saying something to her. She was so tired, she just wanted to sleep. That was the last thing she thought before she let the darkness overwhelm her.

-----------------------------------

Her nostrils were filled with her scent. It overpowered her senses, immediately telling her she was home… Barbara's bedroom.

Warmth enveloped her. She was cocooned by a nice bedspread, her bedspread. She flexed her left leg, that was good, she could move it as soon as she wanted to. No longer were her reactions so delayed. She enjoyed the contact of soft blankets against her skin.  
The sound had gone, thankfully. It wasn't drilling her brain anymore, she had just a small headache. She enjoyed the soft sound of drops of water hitting the glass window. It was raining. She didn't remember when she'd last stopped to listen to such an ordinary sound.

She opened her eyes slowly, blinking a few times before focusing properly. Her vision focused the white color of the ceiling and she stared at it. She realized she had never really looked at before. It was smooth, not exactly white, a bit grey.She was on her side and rolled on to her back, turning her head, she found lovely green eyes watching her.

She smiled. "Hi."

"Hi," the redhead said in a sleepy voice. The restless movement of the brunette had awakened her.

"What… am I doing here?" Helena asked, still a little dazed.

"Short version? We saved your ass last night."

"My ass?" the young woman smiled.

"Yes, your ass." Barbara moved her leg with her hand to help herself turn on her side. "Josie works in the underworld. She is a hired killer."

"Killer?"

"Yes, she sold you to Al Hawke."

"Hawke?" Helena felt ridiculous repeating what Barbara was saying as a question. It must be the lingering effects of that damn sound. "Al Hawke?"

"Yes, he contracted people to find you. You helped Black Canary to escape from his trap and he didn't like that. But we stopped his men before they could deliver you to him."

"Deliver me?"

Shit. Another stupid question. She was not the most brilliant person at this moment.

Barbara smiled "Yes, they were trading you."

"Fuck…" Helena felt stupid. Why hadn't she seen it coming? She closed her eyes.

"You need to choose your lover better next time," Barbara whispered.

"Sorry. I never expected…"

Barbara settled her eyes on the thin woman. Her unruly hair hid her blue pupils. She was blushing; she looked so cute. She couldn't keep hiding her feelings to herself; she had tried to do it, but they were stronger than her.

"Where is Josie?" the brunette asked.

Barbara felt a knot in her throat; she lowered her gaze and bit her lower lip, afraid the brunette had moved on. "In jail… Do you love her?"

"No…" Helena answered instantly and sat up.

"No?"

"No… I just…" The brunette knew she should just keep her mouth shut. " It was just… nothing important."

Barbara sat on the bed supporting herself with the bars above the bed and exhaled before continuing, almost in a whisper. "You slept with her…"

Helena swallowed. Punch directly to her gut. Cornered again.

Now what?

Well, she didn't have any other option. Just tell the truth.

"I was trying to forget you," she finally said. "I was trying, but I couldn't…" the words stuck in her mouth, "I… I was breaking up with her last night."

Green eyes stared at her.

"Don't be mad at me." Helena took her hands between hers and kissed it softly. "I'm sorry, Barbara, I promise you, I'm trying… I don't want you to be mad at me… just…" she said, shyly, lowering her gaze and releasing her hands, "I promise I'll do my best to not feel what I'm feeling for you…"

"I don't want that..." Barbara couldn't hold herself back and, cupping Helena's cheek with her hand, she leaned in and pressed her mouth softly against her. "I want you to keep feeling it for me…"

Motherfucker!

Helena gasped. She was dead and she hadn't realized it before.

Heaven was like Bab's bedroom?

The redhead moved back, smiling. The brunette was breathless. Her heart pounded against her chest, so hard that she was afraid Barbara could hear it.

She had kissed her.

What the hell was that about?

She blinked, looking at her in disbelief. Her muscles tensed. Many feelings overwhelmed her, making it hard for her to think properly. Confusion, fear, excitement. A kiss on the lips was definitely out of friendship. Barbara was straight, she liked men. She told her, very clearly, that she never would love her; she'd always kept her distance.

Suddenly, the young woman's eyes snapped open and she remained motionless. She had said…?

Was she just teasing her or was it for real? Or was she really dead?

"Hel? Are you okay?" the redhead asked, noticing her confusion.

Helena stayed still, completely at a loss. She didn't want to make a wrong move or say something she would regret later. Maybe the redhead was just happy to see her safe.

Yes, that was it…

That must be it… she was misunderstanding everything. Now, she needed to calm down a bit, try to control her breathing. Focus.

Focus.

"Hel?" Barbara brushed her cheek with her knuckles. She never had kissed a woman before, it had been soft, but electric.

That touch definitely wasn't helping the focusing thing. It was like a match that set her on fire.

She nodded, swallowing. "Sorry… I…"

Barbara found Helena's reaction to her words to be inordinately cute. She was staring at her, without a clue as to what to do. To be honest, she didn't know what to do either, so maybe it was best was let her feelings command her actions this time. She leaned in again; her mouth brushing the brunette's softly.

"I said," she mumbled between soft kisses and, with her right hand scratching Helena's scalp, "I… love… you."

The touch of her tongue against her was soft, she had never felt anything like this, she explored slowly, afraid at the beginning because she had never been with a woman before.

A shiver ran throughout the younger woman's body. She felt butterflies in her stomach while her heart wanted to jump out of her chest in joy. She was dazed, but she was definitely sure the movement of those fingers against her scalp were marvelous.

She closed her eyes, enjoying the moment and shyly kissed her back. It was like a kiss in a lovely dream, trying to do it delicately so that the moment would never disappear. When Barbara moved back, she rubbed her face against the smooth skin of the redhead's arm that was still scratching her scalp.

Barbara, knowing Helena's instinctive feline tendencies, found the movement terribly charming.

"Do you really love me?" Helena asked in a hoarse voice, half-opening her eyes.

The young woman watched her with hope and disbelief. Her heart was racing. She wanted to convince herself she wasn't dreaming.

"Yes, I love you, Helena." Barbara said touching her cheek, "I was so afraid to accept it, but I cant hold it back any more… I love you." She leaned in, kissing her again.

The kiss was soft and sweet. She melted under the caress and returned it gently, afraid to move roughly and scare the other woman. Barbara traced the outline of her lips with her tongue. She moaned and opened her mouth, allowing the older woman to move inside her.

The slow, languid strokes made Helena drown in her taste. Before she knew what was happening, she felt Barbara wrap her arms around her. She did the same and rolled on top of her.

The feeling of the older woman's chest against her was incredible; the play of tongues slowly against each other, magic. She was dreaming and she didn't ever want to wake.

When the redhead broke the contact, her heart ached with the loss of those full lips against her, she stared at Barbara with a drunk gaze.

Helena looked adorable, Barbara thought to herself.

"Are you okay?" she whispered, smiling.

"Yeah…"

"I was so afraid to lose you." she whispered, brushing her hair. "I really was scared. I'm sorry… I was so stupid, so blind…."

Helena stopped her words, trapping her lips again. She didn't care about anything, the only thing that mattered was that Barbara loved her. She was not lying, she could feel it, in her caresses, in her touch, in the melting duel of tongues.

She loved Barbara… and Barbara loved her back.

Barbara moved her head back, gasping for air. Now, that had been a real kiss.

Wow.

"Hel…"

The brunette leaned in and rubbed her nose on her cheek.

"Please listen to me," Barbara mumbled. She took the brunette's head in her hands and lifted it to look at her eyes. The young woman growled in disgust. "Listen to me… I'm sorry… I hurt you…"

"Barbara, no…"

"Please listen, I'm… always following my rules… When I knew I was in love with you, I didn't know what to do… Until I almost lost you. I pushed you to that woman…"

Helena opened her mouth to say something, but soft fingers covered her mouth.

"Yes, I pushed you to her," she explained. "I closed the doors of my heart to you. And my heart just wanted to be close to you, to tell you how much I love you."

Helena was speechless. She was had fantasized about this moment for so long and now….

"Will you forgive me?" Barbara asked.

The brunette brushed her cheek against her. The touch was terribly tender.

"There's nothing to forgive …" She bit her ear lobe and whispered, "I'm dreaming, you are my dream."

Barbara turned her head and searched for her lips, this time she was more demanding, more aggressive, surprising the young woman. She took her by surprise and using the strength of her upper body, she rolled them over and was on top of her, focused only on the taste and pleasure of the younger woman. After long seconds, she moved back, smiling.

"Do you think are you dreaming?" she asked.

"I… I'm not sure…" Helena gasped. "Can… we… try that again just to be sure?"

The redhead laughed.

"Sure."


	26. Final

The brunette ate her lunch happily at the kitchen table with Dinah next to her. It was still hard to walk, the sound had affected her balance. The blonde had helped her get to the kitchen. She'd always hated to be helped, but this time she didn't care. There was an incredible joy inside her.

Barbara had opened her heart to her.

She loved her.

For the first time in her life, she thought those poets that wrote about love were not as stupid as she'd always thought. Now she understood phrases like 'my heart sings when I see you' or 'I'm walking in heaven when I take your hand.'

The redhead had been so sweet with her and, after cuddling a few minutes before going to work, they'd talked. The best part was discovering she had been jealous of Reese and Josie all that time. She didn't want to let her go, but the redhead had an important meeting with the principal of the school. Afterwards, she slept almost all morning, soundly, surrounded by Barbara's scent still on her bed.

She chewed on a piece of beef. She almost spit it across the room after Alfred made a joke. The elevator 'ding' announced Barbara's arrival to the ClockTower. She felt her heart jump inside her chest. But she controlled herself, so as to not show anything to the teen and the butler. She needed to talk about it with Barbara first.

"Hi all," the redhead greeted, wheeling inside the kitchen.

"Good afternoon, Miss Barbara," the old butler said.

"Hi, Barbara." Dinah poked a piece of meat with her fork.

The redhead looked at the brunette, she really was beautiful, she loved her. Her smile was electric, she had been extremely happy all day, with a great joy inside her chest that she couldn't hide, and checking the clock every five minutes waiting for the time that she could return home and see her. It was not going to be easy, she needed to learn a lot about her new relationship, but this time she was not going to push her feelings to the side.

"Hi, Hel." She put her hand behind the brunette's neck and pulled her against her to kiss her softly on her lips and turned as if she had done it everyday.

Helena, stunned, stared at her lover; she had kissed her in front of everyone? Now that was the weirdest ever. She looked in trepidation at Dinah and Alfred, waiting for their response, without knowing what to think.

Alfred chuckled and turned to find a plate for the older woman and Dinah smiled, she was happy for them both, Barbara had overcome all her fears and finally made the decision to follow her heart. Helena stared at her without believing what was happening. Now what was she supposed to do?

"How do you feel?" Barbara smiled, stopping the wheelchair next to her and picking up a napkin.

"…Great…" Helena cleared her throat, gulping.

"She is doing pretty well." Alfred said, "She slept almost all day."

The young woman used to sleep so much after a hard day. Barbara imagined it was part of her healing system.

"That's good," she said. "I'm glad you're here. Your balance is better, Hel?" the redhead took a sip of water, amused at the reaction of the young woman.

"Huh?... Well… more or less... Dinah helped me get in here."

"I think that tomorrow you will be okay."

"Yeah… well, she can take me to my place in the car tonight," the brunette said.

"No, I'd prefer you to stay here tonight." The butler gave her a plate with spaghetti. "Thanks, Alfred."

"I told her that," Dinah explained, "but you know Helena."

"I want to check your eardrums tonight and tomorrow morning and check your reflexes," Barbara explained, taking her fork. "I don't want you patrolling until I'm sure you're all right."

"Smart decision." Alfred smiled.

"So, we have a free night?" the teen asked. "I want to go to the movies."

"Sure, I need to work on the Delphi and Helena can rest, and to be sure…" She pulled a plastic bag from her hand bag.

"What is that?" the teen asked, looking at it curiously.

"I rented some of Helena's favorite movies. I thought she might enjoy it."

"I hope it's not any of those stupid horror movies she loves." Dinah lifted her brow.

"Oh no…" Barbara showed her a box and read the title "This one sounds interesting '**_Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Hellbound, Flesh-Eating Subhumanoid Zombified Living Dead, Part 3'_. "**

Helena spat her coke.

"What is that?" Dinah laughed.

"The title of a horror movie, black and white, 2005."

"Are you joking?" Helena took the box looked at it.** " '**Independent New Jersey filmmaker Jim Riffel has redubbed _The Brain That Wouldn't Die_, a campy, low-budget exploitation film released by AIP in 1962. His new film, which he claims cost $99 to produce, is awkwardly titled **_Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh-Eating, Hellbound, Crawling, Zombified, Living-Dead Part 3_**."

"I'll pass." Dinah waved her hands.

" 'Freaks', 1932"" Barbara said, pulling another movie from the bag. "Early horror-film master Tod Browning gathered a cast of real-life sideshow performers for this creepy film about a group of "freaks" who get revenge on the evil, attractive characters."

"That one sounds great," Alfred offered.

"You have got to be joking." The teen glared at her guardian.

"I want to start with 'Freaks'," Helena said happily.

The blonde rolled her eyes. She was definitely going out to the movies.

-----------------------------------

The redhead read the last thing she had typed on the screen. The equation seemed to be okay. She pressed the enter button and the screen filled with numbers and data. A smaller window on the screen read 'searching'.

Opening her heart to Helena and sharing her feelings made her feel free and extremely happy. Helena was an enigmatic woman in many ways, dark, rude, but incredibly sweet when she let people look inside of her, with an incredible need for love and so much to love to give.

Remembering the events of the night before, she couldn't avoid feeling a shiver running through her spine when she remembered that man over the brunette, trying to take advantage of her, touching her...

She closed her eyes, feeling the same anger she'd felt in that moment. She usually never lost control, but this time it was impossible to control herself. The brunette's complete helplessness, plus the tension not knowing if she could rescue her in time, had sent her into a frenzy. Luckily, they were able to save her. She'd checked the unconscious brunette when they'd returned to the Tower.

Afterwards, Dinah had helped her move Helena to her bedroom. She kept a vigil on the young woman, she had almost lost her, and now, life had given her another opportunity. She was not going to lose it. She was going to fight against all societal rules and everyone for Helena. She had been her first enemy in their relationship, denying her own feelings, but now, she had the courage to accept it and to fight for her. To keep Helena's love.

She smiled to herself, remembering the brunette's reaction to her confession and attentions that morning. She stretched her arms.

"I thought you would like this." Alfred appeared, putting a tray of coffee next to her.

"You read my mind."

"My pleasure, Miss Barbara. Do you need anything else before I leave for the night?"

"No, thanks, it's okay," she said, taking a sip of coffee.

"Good night." He smiled and stepped back.

"Alfred? "The redhead turned her head to him.

"Yes, Miss Barbara?"

"I wanted to thank you," she said softly.

"Thank me?" He raised his brow.

"You didn't ask anything…" she lowered her gaze shyly "…about Helena and me."

"Well, it was something that was just about time."

The redhead was shocked. "Just about time?"

"Yes." He smiled. "For you to discover you share her feelings."

"Alfred…" she frowned, "What are you…?"

"Well, the only ones that didn't notice your feelings for her were you and her," he noticed she was blushing, "and I'm glad you had the courage to accept your feelings for her and try. I wish you the best."

She took his hand in hers. "Thank so much. You are a great friend."

"I know." He smirked and walked toward the elevator. "I suggest you go rest and keep an eye on Miss Helena. She asked me for a bowl of ice cream. You know what sugar does to kids."

-----------------------------------

Helena still wondered if she wasn't dreaming; Barbara had been attentive to her all day. Wheeling in sometimes to keep an eye on her and ask her how she felt, greeting her with a kiss, and not caring if Dinah or Alfred was near. And they seemed to accept it happily. She spent the afternoon in the living room watching TV, attentive and cuddling with her. She definitely liked being the center of her attention. She had been with her until late, when Barbara had moved to work at the Delphi and she went lie on the bed.

She felt drunk, surrounded Barbara's scent and the softness of the sheets; she was surely very tired because she had fallen deeply asleep. Dreams with Barbara were always pleasant dreams. Erotic. Her nude, next to her, touching, teasing, tasting.

The excitement was so powerful in the younger woman that she awoke abruptly, totally aroused and breathing heavily.

"Hel? Are you okay?" Barbara's sleepy voice asked from behind her. "Are your ear drums still hurting?

Helena blinked, she was in Barbara's bedroom, dawn was visible through the window. She had fallen so deeply asleep last night that she didn't realize when the redhead returned to her room. The feeling of a warm body behind her, with an elegant arm wrapped around her waist was wonderful… but not the best in her excited state

"Yeah…" she swallowed, "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up. I'm okay."

Barbara smiled and moved closer, kissing her shoulder, "What movie did you watch yesterday?"

Uh… that pressure against her back had been electric. Feeling her so close wasn't helping control the warm heat between her legs. The redhead's hand was on her waist, tracing gentle circles on her bare stomach.

"Repulsion," she mumbled, feeling her eyes morphing between normal and feline. "First Roman Polansky film project: Catherine Devenue had the title role."

Barbara couldn't restrain herself, Helena's skin of was soft, but firm, she wondered how it would taste. The light of the moon filled the room. Her neck was beautiful

"Catherine Deneuve?" Barbara moved her lips toward her neck.

"Yeah," Helena closed her eyes, trying to regain control. Well, that was definitely turning her on. She shifted her legs under the covers, hoping her bedmate wouldn't notice the light movement. "She was a sexually repressed Belgian manicurist…."

"Sexually repressed?" Barbara's hand moved up and brushed the tender the skin under her tank top. "People say that is terrible."

"Jesus…" The brunette felt her nipples harden under the contact. Barbara didn't know how easy she could turn her on. She wanted her, and it would be a bad idea to try to move things too fast as she didn't want to screw things up. She crossed her fingers with the redhead's and moved them slowly to her belly. It was a better place. Barbara's lips found her ear lobe. Fuck.

"Bar… Barba…. Barbara…" she gasped.

"Yes?" the redhead nibbled her lobe.

Helena broke the contact and turned around to face the redhead. She rested her head on her shoulder, hugging her and breathing hard. She was aroused, very aroused. She needed to calm a bit.

" Helena?" Barbara asked, softly brushing her hair. Something was wrong, maybe she was pushing so much

"Give me a second," she mumbled.

The redhead moved her head back and took the brunette's face in her hands. She looked for the brunette eyes but she had her lids closed.

"I don't want push you… I'm sorry… Is just…" Barbara mumbled. "I just wanted touch you."

"Is not that..." Helena mumbled. "Well… you… I have trouble controlling myself and I don't want…"

Barbara smiled. "Look at me," she said sweetly.

Helena was aroused. Amazing golden eyes met hers. Barbara had always thought it was damn sexy. She never had done this but she was not afraid, with Helena everything was easy and natural

"Love me…" the older woman whispered, trapping the brunette's lips between hers and cupping her breast with her hand. "Show me how to love you…"

Helena growled. Barbara's voice hit her core. All right, that was enough. No more words. She was officially out of control. She rolled in the redhead's arms and was suddenly on top of her.

"I love you…" she mumbled covering her face with kisses. Her fingers moved slowly, exploring the soft and marvelous pale skin gently

She was taking her time, she had dreamed of this so many nights and wanted to enjoy each second and make it pleasant for the other woman. Her mouth moved down to taste the redhead's long neck. She bit gently at the pulse point; she felt her shiver. She couldn't believe she was finally with her.

Barbara arched her back when she felt the brunette's mouth cup her right breast through her top. Helena was being incredibly sweet in each movement, in each touch. She felt a tingling sensation all over her body.

The young woman purred, feeling Barbara's hand caressing her spine under her tee. She rose up to help her to remove the top. Barbara lost her breath when she saw Helena exposed to her. She had seen her nude thousands of times, but never like this. She seemed to be a fine porcelain sculpture, with her muscles perfectly delineated. She put her arms around the brunette's neck and pulled her against her to steal another kiss, moving her hand under Helena's underwear to cup one of her ass cheeks.

This time the former cyber genius moved with demanding strokes. Helena felt her clit pulsing harder, the movement of Barbara's hands against her ass cheek make her excitement grow. She began to move her hips against her in slow movements. Shit. She was touching her. She was finally touching her.

The young woman pulled Barbara's top down freeing one of her breast. "You are so beautiful," Helena growled before her mouth lowered slowly and enveloped a rock hard nipple. The feeling was marvelous, she sucked slowly, letting her tongue caress the soft skin under it, while her hand kneaded the other breast on top of her shirt.

Barbara groaned and hugged the young woman, a delicious moist heat enveloped her and the pull of her lover's mouth made her mind dizzy. She had denied this to herself so long... and no more.

Helena was lost in the sensation of the soft flesh under her for long minutes. She suddenly kneeled on the bed and moved her head up.

"Sorry," the brunette breathed heavily, "This is hindering me."

Barbara sat up to help her to remove her top. Helena stared at her, kneeling. She was damn beautiful. She wanted to jump on the woman, but she stopped when she saw green eyes fixed on her. She swallowed, fisting her hands in balls to contain herself.

The older woman took a slender wrist in her hands and pulled Helena to her. The slow teasing of long fingers along Helena's body was like fire; every inch was overwhelmed by desire. The pressure of her soft nipples against her made them both shiver and gasp in pleasure.

The dark haired woman began to rub her body slowly against her lover, without breaking the kiss. She wanted to consume her, fill all her senses.

Barbara rolled over. She was on top. Her long fingers cupped a small breast, she closed her eyes to let her senses feel, enjoy, a new territory. The woman she loved. Barbara's mouth found her breast and cupped it tenderly.

Gasping, the brunette rolled them over again and put Barbara's back on the mattress. Rapid exhalations and the sound of sheets shifting under the movement of bodies broke the silence of the dark room. They explored, teased and touched, discovering each other, trying to find sensitive points, pleasure points.

"Sorry," Helena smirked, "I don't want this to end yet."

Barbara wondered how she could have been avoiding this marvelous moment for so long. Helena's touch was different from any man she had been with. In bed, she was incredibly delicate, gentle, the polar opposite of her of violent crime fighter persona. She seemed to know where to touch her and, more importantly, how to touch her.

The young woman licked Barbara's chin and began to kiss her. She moved down the slender body slowly, with soft caresses and stopped at the perfectly delineated abdomen of the older woman. A powerful scent filled her nostrils. She rested her forehead on the older woman's belly and closed her eyes. The smell overwhelmed her: Barbara's arousal. It was a direct hit to her libido and she felt her own sex moist with lust. She lowered herself and kissed Barbara's inner thigh. The aroma was powerful. She closed her eyes. Barbara cupped her face between her hands and pulled her up.

"Come here… I want you here…" She caught her lips.

Barbara had never been so aroused, so hot for someone; she had been hacked by a strange and dangerous lust virus that didn't allow her to think properly. She noticed the soft rocking of the young woman's hips against her and increased her tempo.

"God!" the redhead gasped, feeling Helena's hand touching her sex.

"Do you feel it?" Helena asked softly.

"Yes…"

The brunette moved her hand and began to rub her gently. She loved Barbara's reactions and the sounds she emitted. Erotic sounds to her ears, guiding her.

"I love you." The brunette kissed the redhead's lips at the time she thrust into her, "I love you so much."

The older woman arched and closed her eyes, overwhelmed by the sensation. They began to move until they found the rhythm.

They lost long minutes in sensations and movements. The brunette kept the movement of strong fingers against the redhead's sex; concentrating in when the older woman reacted to her touches, discovering what would pleasure her. Barbara thought she would go crazy, Helena seemed to know where she needed be touched. A thumb grazed her clit. She cried out.

The dark woman smiled to herself, knowing she had caught her prey. She moved up and kissed the older woman. Totally submerged in pleasure, the aroused and panting redhead moaned when she felt the young woman finger's teasing her entrance.

"Please Helena…" Helena moved gracefully and put her sex against Barbara's thigh, rocking.

She was loving Barbara. Barbara was loving her. She was in heaven and each time she moved faster, grunting. She buried her head in the long, elegant neck of her former mentor, feeling the moment coming. Barbara wrapped her arms around her young partner. Her nails buried deliciously in her back. She felt her orgasm build up -- slowly, inevitably.

Helena swallowed her cry of release covering Barbara's mouth with her own. The brunette felt her fingers trapped inside warm walls and a warm moisture enveloping her hand. She was there. And so was Barbara. The young woman was enveloped by an incredibly long, powerful climax, one as she'd never felt before that blocked all her senses. Helena was exhausted, feeling the softness of her human pillow under her. She wrapped her arms around Barbara and enjoyed the feeling for long minutes listening to the steady rhythm of the older woman's breath.

-----------------------------------

When she opened her eyes again, the room was illuminated with the light of day. Cocooned in a soft bed, curled tightly against a very nude and beautiful Barbara Gordon, was glorious for her. Her head rested on her sharp shoulder. She let inhaled the combined scents of herself and the other woman. She closed her eyes, remembering each wonderful moment they had shared a few minutes before. Her fingers caressed the side of the older woman's smooth torso. She felt long fingers brushing her hair gently. She lifted her head. Marvelous green eyes were tenderly regarding her.

"Hi…" she smiled.

"Hi…" Barbara kissed her forehead. "Glad you're back."

"I was out?"

"Very…"

The brunette lifted up and kissed her softly on the lips. The redhead kissed her back; she had been so close to losing her. She had been so stupid. She held the thin body tightly against her.

"I was so afraid… I was avoiding you, and you are wonderful… I was so stupid."

"Don't say another word." Helena moved back and stared at her lovingly. She cupped the redhead's cheek and brushed her lips with her thumb. She narrowed her eyes.

"Something wrong?" The redhead lifted her brow.

The brunette remained still, lost in her gaze.

"Hel?"

"Do you know how frickin' sexy you are when you wear your glasses?" The question make the redhead laugh.

"You're crazy:"

"It's true." The brunette grinned. "It's always turned me on."

"How can I turn you on wearing eyeglasses?"

Helena crawled over her and took the eye glasses from the night table.

"What are you doing?" Barbara frowned.

Helena put the glasses on the other woman and moved back, kneeling on the mattress. Her eyes glued on the older woman nude's body, her skin was like porcelain, an incredible waist and perfectly delineated abs. She worked so much in her upper body and it was fantastic. Her gaze lowered, stopping on the juncture of her long legs. Her mouth was suddenly dry..

"Fuck…" she swallowed, feeling a knot in her throat.

"What's going on?" the redhead asked, intrigued.

The young woman leaned over her slowly, brushing abs against abs, breasts against breasts. Both women shivered under the sensation. When Helena's face was inches from the older woman's, Barbara's heart was beating really loud against her chest. Her fine hearing could hear it clearly. She pressed her lips against Barbara's and the older woman opened her mouth to let her in. They melted in a passionate kiss.

"I was right…." the brunette mumbled through the kiss.

"Right?"

"Yeah… I'm turned on… let's do it again."

THE END

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**Thanks for all your somments and post, many of them make me laugh, you all are terrible funny. Thanks for your kind words and Im glad you had enjoyed as me, this fic.**

**Jag**


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